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  • Town/Country : Mississauga, Canada
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 25 November 1999 (16 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 382
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

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hoeslikedicks's page activity

Visits<b>Raveen</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 4:24pm<b>hadim</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 4:02pm<b>odod777</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 3:13pm<b>Kitteh8601</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 5:33pm<b>black_day</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 9:34am<b>Mmorpheus</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 8:30am<b>Nai_Wiley</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 8:30am<b>xn3x</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 7:11am<b>aimeeowl</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 4:54am<b>rhyspiecesno8</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 11:27pm<b>dimos4ever</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 7:22pm<b>clickme</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 5:18pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 2:46pm<b>marshm610</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 10:11am<b>arealsexybitch</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 9:49am<b>XanderLance</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 6:39am<b>princessofbelair</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 6:58pm<b>R_Sage88</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 8:36pm

Fucked!<b>hadim</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 10:03pm<b>Kitteh8601</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 11:33pm<b>Mmorpheus</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 2:31pm<b>sparkledoge</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 8:37pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/16/2016 at 3:18pm<b>spankthatcow</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 7:01pm<b>camogirl2249</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 4:49am<b>Makksiim</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 4:06am<b>odod777</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 1:18pm<b>val2114</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 3:47am<b>Idekanymore123</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 2:47am<b>Emi1y</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 2:28am<b>csjc</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 2:23am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 2:19am<b>perfect_heart13</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 5:16am<b>maria95aa</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 12:31pm<b>hairissabear</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 5:16am<b>butterfingers583</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 3:29am

hoeslikedicks's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of hoeslikedicks's badges

hoeslikedicks's favorite FMLs

Today, I found a bowl of green beans just sitting in my microwave. The only person in my life who ever eats green beans is my psycho ex-girlfriend. She moved out three months ago. FML

by now afraid... / 04/03/2016 at 1:28pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, it's been three months since i went to my GP for a swollen foot. She sent me to a rheumatologist, a pulmonologist, vein ultrasound, DNA testing and finally an X-ray, which revealed I've been walking around on a broken foot. By now, the two bones are grown together at weird angles, forever. FML

Today, my scumfuck brother and his friends spent my baby sister's funeral snickering and telling dead baby jokes to one another. FML

by Anonymous / 09/18/2015 at 11:35pm / United States / Kids

Today, my dad got so drunk that I had to drive him home. He kept yelling at me to not speed, saying I was going too fast and that there were too many bumps on the road. I hadn't even started the car yet. FML

Today, after being with my fiance for almost a decade, my future mother-in-law has been accusing me of being a gold digger because we want to buy a house together. She has conveniently forgotten her son was out of work for two years and I supported the both of us. FML

Today, I slept on the plane ride home and had a scary nightmare. I started screaming in my dream, so loud that it shocked the old lady sitting next to me into screaming as well. The whole plane began laughing as we were both screaming. FML

Today, I was walking down the street holding my boyfriend's hand, when a seemingly sweet old man said to him, "Hey, you've got to hold her hand properly". I asked him to show me what properly meant. He licked my hand. FML

by peak4u / 10/09/2014 at 5:42pm / United Kingdom (Milton Keynes) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while on the bus, a friendly-looking guy smiled at me, so I smiled back. He then pointed at my teeth and said, "You gonna get those fixed, or just keep them as a conversation starter?" FML

Today, I found out I sent several embarrassing videos while under the influence of the meds I was given while getting my wisdom teeth out. When I asked my mom why she didn't take my phone, she said she tried but I started whining and growling at her. FML

Today, my girlfriend of three weeks found the engagement ring I tried to give to my ex. She started crying and said yes. FML

Today, on a flight, I needed to use the restroom. The passenger next to me was in a deep sleep, and was very large, so I couldn't get out by climbing over him. The urge got severe, so I resorted to tapping him on the shoulder. Turns out he had some nice reflexes and hit me in the face. FML

Today, on a flight, I needed to use the restroom. The passenger next to me was in a deep sleep, and was very large, so I couldn't get out by climbing over him. The urge got severe, so I resorted to tapping him on the shoulder. Turns out he had some nice reflexes and hit me in the face. FML

Today, my vibrator was in another room and I was too lazy to get it. I was also too lazy to do it manually. It's like I've been married to myself for too long. FML

Today, it's the last day of my sign language class. At the end of the class, my teacher surprised us by speaking for the first time, also surprising everyone that she wasn't actually deaf. It wouldn't have been so bad had I not just given someone an answer to the test, thinking she couldn't hear me. FML

Today, I ate some amazing homemade brownies that my best friend's wife made for us. She waited till I'd shoved a third one into my mouth before she mentioned she made them with breast milk. Knowing her, I don't even doubt it was true. FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2014 at 3:36pm / United Kingdom (Fife) / Miscellaneous