Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

hilamonster06

Offline (4 hours ago) | Search for a member

hilamonster06

15Fucked!

hilamonster06hilamonster06
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 24 November 1987 (28 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 521
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

hilamonster06's page activity

Visits<b>purplesauce</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 8:08pm<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 10:50pm<b>psychedelicdezzy</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 1:06am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 5:29pm<b>my_fucking__luck</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 9:19am<b>MidnaLink</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 9:16am<b>yellow33</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 6:42pm<b>Gabygonzalez9211</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 1:37pm<b>cutycat136</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 7:19am<b>missa8604</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 11:47pm<b>Incognico</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 1:37am<b>Saxicolous</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 11:42pm<b>Froggy_Smacks</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 10:36am<b>prout92340</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 4:52pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 11:55pm<b>BillieGoat</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 11:10pm<b>mineller</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 5:07pm<b>Steffi3</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 3:06pm

Fucked!<b>Gabygonzalez9211</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 7:37pm<b>missa8604</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 5:47am<b>purplesauce</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 4:03pm<b>Moskaaa7</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 2:25am<b>Silentbadgurl55</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 9:23am<b>watermelon15</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 6:08pm<b>Aquila_Umbrae</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 2:38pm<b>RonFingSwanson</b> - the 09/20/2015 at 3:46pm<b>nonononononono</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 4:53pm<b>kittina</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 4:50pm<b>BexxyBb</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 12:56am<b>pizzzzza</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 6:30pm<b>MichelleMaBelle</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 4:24am<b>Threnody666</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 6:21am<b>supersavvy</b> - the 04/03/2015 at 2:59am

hilamonster06's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of hilamonster06's badges

hilamonster06's favorite FMLs

Today, I was driving a little over the speed limit, when I saw a cop car waiting to join the road ahead of me. I quickly hit the brakes so they wouldn't have a payday with me. I hit the brakes too hard, lost control and almost ended up on someone's lawn. FML

#21510493
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9902) - you deserved it (23035)

On 01/02/2016 at 2:04am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, something must be wrong with me. Last night, my dick went limper than overcooked spaghetti while in my wife's mouth, yet today I popped a massive boner that you could hammer nails with, while cutting the grass. FML

#21496296
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25785) - you deserved it (2670)

On 11/24/2015 at 2:38pm - intimacy - by anonymous (man) - Switzerland (Zug)

Today, my boyfriend and I lost our virginity to one another. He then did a naked victory lap around his dad's house, blasting Akon's "I Just Had Sex" at full volume. He's legally an adult. FML

#21472201
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28613) - you deserved it (5571)

On 09/24/2015 at 1:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I had to sit through yet another one of my mom's, "You need to grow and gain some weight!" rants. I'm 22 and she doesn't believe me when I tell her I'm done growing. I'm pretty sure I'm not getting past 5'2". FML

#21223478
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44113) - you deserved it (3683)

On 07/29/2014 at 4:27am - misc - by Tiny (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I went to my weekly AA meeting. It was a huge crowd and I was the guest speaker. Not 5 minutes into my speech, I was booed off stage and banned from further attendance because I accidentally wore a Jack Daniel's shirt. FML

#21217633
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23288) - you deserved it (54179)

On 07/22/2014 at 7:20pm - health - by dypshyyt - United States (Florida)

Today, while eating dinner with my boyfriend, I look up to see him staring at me, smiling. Hoping he wanted to say how lucky of a man he was who loved me deeply, I asked him what he was thinking. He replied, "You can't smell that yet? It was a noxious one." FML

#21209203
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43296) - you deserved it (6431)

On 07/14/2014 at 7:48pm - love - by KaiyaOtaku1 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, while in my backyard, I had some insane gastric distress. I let out a fart so powerful that it made me yelp in pain, and left my asshole numb. A second later, I heard a cough come from over my neighbor's fence. I had to quietly limp back into my house in shame. FML

#21206177
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43918) - you deserved it (6675)

On 07/11/2014 at 4:34pm - health - by soundslikeadumbcommentersituation (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was in a restaurant bathroom, when another girl walked in. I have anxiety issues, and couldn't leave my stall until the other person went first. She rushed into a stall and had violent diarrhea for a good 10 minutes. FML

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

#21205823
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55146) - you deserved it (7452)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend was feeling down because she has put on some weight. I tried to make her feel better by showing her I can still pick her up. I can, and I was even able to hide the fact that I shat myself doing it. I'm so romantic. FML

#21200680
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56754) - you deserved it (8458)

On 07/06/2014 at 3:28pm - love - by oh shit (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I'm staying with my in-laws. My husband is fighting with his dad, who's fighting with his brother-in-law, who's fighting with his wife. The only ones not fighting are my sister-in-law and her boyfriend, who're getting along great on a squeaky mattress in the room next to mine. FML

#20975413
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50786) - you deserved it (4014)

On 11/30/2013 at 12:58am - intimacy - by Thanksalot (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I texted a cute picture of my boyfriend and me to my mom, who lives very far away. She replied saying that my Photoshop skills are great, but that I don't need to go so far to pretend that anyone would date me, and that there's no shame in being single at 25. FML

#20899972
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47339) - you deserved it (3082)

On 09/29/2013 at 12:12am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, as I was about to enter a public restroom, a man walked out and said, "You may want to hold your nose in there. I just took the biggest dump of my life." It was the ladies' restroom. FML

#20785565
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48487) - you deserved it (3257)

On 07/16/2013 at 12:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, due to my allergies I can't stop sneezing. It wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't for my hemorrhoids making each sneeze feel like I'm getting a cactus shoved up my ass. FML

#20679212
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41518) - you deserved it (3716)

On 05/22/2013 at 1:38am - health - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my elderly neighbor had asked me to take her to her early morning doctor's appointment. I arrived at her house at 7:30 as agreed, and she appeared to have forgotten who I was. She started lobbing eggs out of her window at me, telling me she wasn't interested in what I was selling. FML

#20525434
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32952) - you deserved it (2493)

On 02/28/2013 at 6:57am - misc - by she sure has an arm. - United States (Massachusetts)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: