hessel

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hessel

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 12 November 1997 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1835
  • Number of comments : 123
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About hessel : i am handsome, smart, rich, strong, popular, athletic and a compulsive liar

hessel's page activity

Visits<b>Chibster</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 5:12pm<b>nikkibodnarchuk</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 12:35am<b>Tgimonday</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 1:06pm<b>teacupofsunshine</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 12:22am<b>carbontetra</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 10:14pm<b>Ahaddad123</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 8:09am<b>MrNiceGuy569</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 6:39am<b>iPixelCheese</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 12:17am<b>LifeKeepsGoingOn</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 1:32am<b>savannah2208</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 11:07pm<b>Pilotdog</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 8:59am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 9:30am<b>SydLovesLacey</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 3:16pm<b>HairyPunisher</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 5:36pm<b>MysticPanda</b> - the 02/20/2015 at 5:59pm<b>Kierst</b> - the 01/26/2015 at 1:32pm<b>lndala</b> - the 12/26/2014 at 12:10pm<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 10/13/2014 at 11:22pm

Fucked!<b>HairyPunisher</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 11:36pm<b>MysticPanda</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 12:00am

hessel's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of hessel's badges

hessel's favorite FMLs

Today, someone came into the store I work at, laughed at my name on my name-tag, and left without even buying anything. FML

by Anonymous / 06/26/2013 at 5:07am / United States / Work

Today, I was bored so I began to try to convince my boyfriend that Albert Einstein was actually African-American, and that he painted himself white so he would be accepted as a scientist. Due to his competitive nature, he replied, "I already knew that babe." FML

by anonymous / 06/25/2013 at 2:12am / United States (Minnesota) / Geek

Today, I was riding a bike when a truck accidentally hit me. The handsome driver came out and asked if I was alright. I said, "I am now" and winked. He said "Eww, no" then immediately ran away and drove his truck around me. FML

by Anonymous / 06/13/2013 at 9:44pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Transportation

Today, I left my dog in the car while I quickly ran into a store. I came out to a woman smashing at my window, screaming that it was too hot in the car for the dog and saying I was being inhumane. The car was still running and the air conditioning was on. FML

by Anonymous / 06/12/2013 at 12:47pm / United States (New Jersey) / Animals

Today, I got a concussion and several staples in my head. As it turns out, watering flowers is much more dangerous than it might sound. FML

by Sean / 06/09/2013 at 10:27pm / United States / Health

Today, I went to the gym for the first time in a while. I was doing upper body workouts and decided to ask a very large man to spot me while I did bench presses. As he stood over me, I saw two beads of sweat roll off his nose. One hit me on the cheek. The other landed in my open mouth. FML

by dollabill009 / 06/06/2013 at 4:49am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had my wisdom teeth pulled. I woke up right as the dentist pulled my last tooth. FML

by Applejacks18 / 06/06/2013 at 1:01am / United States (Montana) / Health

Today, my boyfriend of six days proposed to me. FML

by The Clitshank Redemption / 06/05/2013 at 7:11pm / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Love

Today, my puppy came into my room, and I cupped his head in my hands and bent down to kiss him. As I did, I realized that the part of his head I was kissing was covered in his own shit that he'd seemingly been rolling in. FML

by SHIT-BREATH / 06/05/2013 at 12:03pm / United Kingdom (Monmouthshire) / Animals

Today, I was getting out of my car, when my new neighbor asked if I'd help him unhitch a trailer. On my way over, he said, "Oh never mind, I thought you were a boy." I am a boy. FML

by Time for a haircut / 05/21/2013 at 3:05pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in the doctor's office waiting for my husband to arrive, when a little old lady sat beside me. She seemed nice, until she started farting and blaming it on me. They weren't silent; they sounded like trucker farts and smelled like death. I was there for over an hour. FML

by babs / 05/07/2013 at 3:07pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was reading and started laughing at a funny part in my book. My mom then bitched me out because she thought I was laughing at her. She called me a liar after I explained myself. Her logic? "Books aren't funny". FML

by Marmarfarfar / 05/07/2013 at 12:43pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in a bathroom stall and I accidentally dropped my new tampon on the ground. Just as I was about to reach for it, I heard a voice on the other side of the stall say, "Oh great, I needed that" and then a hand reached under my stall and grabbed it. It was my last one. FML

by the girl next door / 05/07/2013 at 1:10am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML

by SkeetinKeaton / 05/06/2013 at 2:29am / United States / Kids

Today, I accidentally dropped my engagement ring down a sewer. To my surprise, the sewer water was frozen and my ring sat on top. During my efforts to retrieve it, I had to watch as the ice slowly melted due to the warm day. The ring sank further and further until it was completely gone. FML

by CLH / 01/25/2011 at 1:08pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous