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hereicomment's favorite FMLs
by fartypants / 06/18/2015 at 6:53pm / United States (Florida) / Work
by feels like an asshole / 06/09/2015 at 4:03pm / United States / Health
Today, I was exhausted due to staying up all night practicing for the most important performance of my orchestral career. I decided to take a nap to energize myself in preparation of the evening and woke up just in time to realize I'd missed the entire concert. FML
by bruhskoni / 05/30/2015 at 10:25pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by sianydiddle / 04/30/2015 at 6:36pm / Intimacy
by MiniJeans / 04/29/2015 at 10:25pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
Today, coming home, I discovered that my dog had left me a beautiful mound of poop in the middle of the corridor. He'd made an effort, though: there was a roll of shredded toilet paper next to it. FML
by morphea / 04/29/2015 at 6:54pm / France (Bretagne) / Animals
by Anonymous / 02/27/2015 at 2:37pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
Today, I came home from work to find that my girlfriend had sold all of my N64 and Atari games and both the consoles and bought me a PS4 with the money. While I was standing there in shock, she kissed me on the cheek and said, "I know, I'm the greatest." FML
by Anonymous / 02/22/2015 at 3:41pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by poncho55 / 02/21/2015 at 3:28pm / Miscellaneous
by bradix1186 / 02/21/2015 at 1:00pm / Philippines (North Cotabato) / Health
by BDSM4Jesus / 01/19/2015 at 11:42pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time in over a month. When I came, I thrust one last time and let out a huge fart. She couldn't keep her mouth shut about it, and now all our friends keep calling me "CumFart". FML
by I'll Make You FartCum / 01/02/2015 at 4:53pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I was leading a tour of my university and saw a girl in ripped jeans and combat boots smoking a cigarette. I told her that she shouldn't be representing the school in such a manner. She shot back: "I'm a Presidential Scholar. Suck my dick, bitch." FML
by Anonymous / 10/15/2014 at 1:07pm / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous
Today, my girlfriend went shopping at Victoria's Secret with me. While she was in the fitting room, her parents walked by and saw me. They don't approve of the store, so I panicked and told them I was considering becoming a woman. FML
by Anonymous / 09/09/2014 at 11:16pm / United States (California) / Love
Today, after years of wonderful flying experiences, I boarded a flight and took my seat only to find a baby sitting in front of me, behind me, and to the right of me, and across the aisle from me. All of whom decided to cry in unison. It was a 9-hour flight. FML
by MLeguillon / 09/01/2014 at 12:34am / United States (Missouri) / Transportation
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…