Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

helloimclaudia

Offline (10 hours ago) | Search for a member

helloimclaudia

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 8 November 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1107
  • Number of comments : 54
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About helloimclaudia : About me:
I'm a eighteen year old girl from The Netherlands. I speak Dutch, English, a little bit of French and a little bit of German. One of my goals is learning Spanish.
Right now, I'm in the fifth, and last, class of high school. (For the dutch people, 5 havo.) You could say that I'm in senior year.

helloimclaudia's page activity

Visits<b>paintedwings12</b> - 16 hours ago<b>hfudge</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 2:11pm<b>weveallbeenthere</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 8:26pm<b>ShadowGenius</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 4:10pm<b>hasanjk</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 9:29am<b>aliceablaze</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 1:20pm<b>Techno101</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 10:55am<b>lungjiao</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 10:51pm<b>limitedition</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 2:05pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 01/11/2015 at 12:27am<b>Kitty_Kat44</b> - the 01/03/2015 at 3:49pm<b>Shmatterhorn</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 10:33am<b>Steve95401</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 12:24am<b>firestream</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 3:19am<b>wasliedtoasakid</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 5:48pm<b>54MU31</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 4:10pm<b>Awesomegasm</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 8:06pm<b>stonedfly3</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 5:29pm

Liked!<b>man_in_black08</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 7:26pm

helloimclaudia's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of helloimclaudia's badges

helloimclaudia's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home from work to find that my girlfriend had sold all of my N64 and Atari games and both the consoles and bought me a PS4 with the money. While I was standing there in shock, she kissed me on the cheek and said, "I know, I'm the greatest." FML

#21361122
460 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44307) - you deserved it (4015)

On 02/22/2015 at 3:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I sat my son down for the sex talk. By the time it was over, he'd corrected me on several factual errors and told me what felching is. Now I remember why I never wanted kids. FML

#21340142
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31168) - you deserved it (6423)

On 01/19/2015 at 9:34am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, I told my father I'm going to a club with a friend and staying the night at my friend's place. He asked for my friend's name, number, and address so he knows where I'll be. I'm 30 years old. FML

Today, I had to show up at an anti-drugs lecture with full-blown pink eye. It's from an ongoing bacterial infection, but the speaker said he'd heard that excuse a hundred times before, and shamed me in front of everyone. FML

#21289648
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31998) - you deserved it (2472)

On 11/01/2014 at 11:28am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out the guy I've been dating for 5 months is engaged to his girlfriend of 3 years. I found out as we were talking, waiting for him to come outside after work. FML

#21288734
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35715) - you deserved it (3101)

On 10/30/2014 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by taylor w - United States

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

#21262210
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42504) - you deserved it (11634)

On 09/21/2014 at 1:11am - intimacy - by RuinedTheMood (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went with a couple of my friends to see a friend who's fallen very ill. Her dad walked in with a gun and demanded to know which of us had gotten his daughter pregnant. By the time I realized it was a joke, I'd already pissed myself. FML

#21261205
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34724) - you deserved it (4399)

On 09/19/2014 at 11:30am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I jokingly told my friend that I was the kid who stole his brand new glow-in-the-dark markers back in kindergarten. Now he's ignoring my texts and calls and says we're through. So much for our twelve years of friendship. FML

#20918380
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39558) - you deserved it (9679)

On 10/13/2013 at 12:33am - misc - by markerThief (man) - United States (California)

Today, we went boating with friends. For some reason the bottom of our tube deflated, causing me to be bounced roughly up and down on the water. As a result, I had the most intense orgasm of my entire life, while sitting 2 inches away from my dad's friend. He definitely noticed. FML

#20862305
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56550) - you deserved it (6019)

On 08/31/2013 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by SplishSplash (woman) - United States

Today, I discovered I have epilepsy. 10 years ago, I told my mother about my frequent fits of vertigo, deja vu, nausea, flashes of memory and strange sounds, smells, and images, coupled with an other-worldly feeling. I thought they were holy visions. So did she. FML

Today, I was going through my daughter's contacts, except all of them had names from Harry Potter. I found the name "Mom." I was relieved I didn't have some silly name, until I realized it wasn't my number; it was her father's new wife. My number was under "Voldemort." FML

#20726673
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48994) - you deserved it (20729)

On 06/15/2013 at 12:19am - kids - by Jill (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. She pulled down my trousers, saw my Poke-ball boxers, and absolutely lost it. I had to lie next to her in bed for the next 10 minutes hearing her howl with laughter while crying "Dickachu, I choose you!" FML

#20711208
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57199) - you deserved it (66114)

On 06/07/2013 at 3:10am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, whilst driving past a cyclist, I thought it would be funny to make him jump by blasting my horn right behind him and then driving off. I guess he thought it would be funny to catch up with me, yank off my wing-mirror, and hurl it through the open window at my face. FML

Today, I was in a bathroom stall and I accidentally dropped my new tampon on the ground. Just as I was about to reach for it, I heard a voice on the other side of the stall say, "Oh great, I needed that" and then a hand reached under my stall and grabbed it. It was my last one. FML

#20647074
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60571) - you deserved it (4736)

On 05/07/2013 at 1:10am - misc - by the girl next door (woman) - United States (Missouri)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: