Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

heinous966

Offline (the 01/16/2015 at 8:35pm) | Search for a member

heinous966

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4650
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 27 posted

About heinous966 : I'm slightly obsessed with Star Trek.

heinous966's page activity

Visits<b>getindoe69</b> - 3 hours ago<b>BestOrginalName</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 8:23am<b>minimanion</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 1:30pm<b>bethkelchner</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 3:48pm<b>jomar_19</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 10:52pm<b>thesnypist8</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 12:08pm<b>adamant84</b> - the 06/13/2015 at 7:28pm<b>StrangeNigga</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 10:39pm<b>facelick</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 1:57pm<b>jsb1426</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 12:45am<b>metalbullet</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 6:04pm<b>VeryMuchDutch</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 11:19am<b>Juicenub</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 4:39am<b>Effulgence</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 12:32pm<b>Kitty1811</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 1:00am<b>Malteser95</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 3:08am<b>imkool136</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 6:56am<b>Mendez6</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 12:02am

Fucked!<b>minimanion</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 9:27pm<b>imkool136</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 12:56pm<b>douglas423</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 1:47am<b>thesnypist8</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 7:32am

heinous966's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of heinous966's badges

heinous966's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that the girl who my high school boyfriend cheated on me with is now the woman my husband is having an affair with. FML

#14503708
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65230) - you deserved it (3830)

On 01/08/2011 at 12:22am - misc - by sad (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my crush walked me home. As my mom opens the door, she tells me in Russian how ugly he is, and that I have extremely bad taste. Out of all the languages in the world, he happens to be fluent in Russian. FML

#13432971
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44305) - you deserved it (3632)

On 10/13/2010 at 10:45am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Brunei Darussalam

Today, my cousin came to visit from America. While out shopping, she said loudly that she was having trouble finding clothes to fit around her huge fanny, causing a lot of people to stare in our direction. I had to explain to her that "fanny" in the UK means "vagina." FML

#12975254
276 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37283) - you deserved it (4193)

On 09/09/2010 at 10:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my very handsome, fit, Russian boyfriend tried to make me feel better about being a little overweight by telling me, "It's okay, you're American, everyone expects you to be fat." FML

#10696817
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33537) - you deserved it (14628)

On 05/22/2010 at 7:24pm - love - by ChubbyAmerican (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, my boyfriend wanted to have Valentine's Day sex. He then remembered it was unlimited pancakes at IHOP. FML

#8246402
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20218) - you deserved it (3425)

On 02/14/2010 at 11:31am - intimacy - by DallasGal (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was having sex with a girl when her parents decided to come home early. Trying to run out the back door I fell and broke my ankle. Not only did her former Navy Seal father find out I was banging his little princess, he drove me to the ER, alone. FML

#7598826
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13043) - you deserved it (27414)

On 01/26/2010 at 9:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, a man I don't know came up to me and started screaming about how "all you damn Mexicans were stealing American's jobs" and he stormed off. I'm Native American, and I'm pretty sure we've been here longer. FML

#7482237
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52361) - you deserved it (4153)

On 01/21/2010 at 7:45pm - misc - by hardtotell (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I almost crashed my car because I was checking out an Old Navy mannequin wearing a bra. FML

#7313785
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5874) - you deserved it (44747)

On 01/13/2010 at 1:31am - misc - by Creepster (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my mother confronted me about my bird's masturbation problem. We spent Christmas Eve Googling "bird masturbating" and watching videos to see if that was actually what my bird was doing. At least he's having a good Christmas. FML

#6933145
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25594) - you deserved it (3162)

On 12/25/2009 at 1:25am - animals - by suuuuuupucci (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went on blind date with a guy because both our moms thought we'd like eachother. Things were going really well until I got up to go to the bathroom and he says: "My mom was right, you do have perfect breedin' hips!" FML

#6255110
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36107) - you deserved it (3632)

On 11/11/2009 at 7:21am - love - by Starchyld (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to my Russian language class after days of being sick. We must speak in Russian. The professor asked how I felt. I said "like shit." I didn't know the word I used was the verb, not the noun. So I told an awesome prof and class I was "feeling like I was in the process of defacating." FML



FML's blog

  • Feeling shitty? Write to Auntie Bernie!
  • It's a new summer, so here's a new feature. OK, that doesn't mean much, but you've got to start somewhere. The idea came from the fact that we get sent a lot of FMLs that touch us, in our heart of…

Friday 24 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: