heartlessbiotch

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heartlessbiotch

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 29 February 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 378
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About heartlessbiotch : I go to seek a great perhaps.

heartlessbiotch's page activity

Visits<b>ratman775</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 5:08pm<b>allisenmae</b> - the 01/09/2014 at 10:36pm<b>tea_brewer</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 9:43pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 6:56am<b>TallyFtw69</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 8:29am<b>Grand_Cookie</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 5:21am<b>pimp_named_mitch</b> - the 09/24/2013 at 2:48pm<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 9:30pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 3:28pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 09/16/2013 at 1:32am<b>Dracoboxer357</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 12:52am<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 3:58pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 3:31pm<b>ilovecuddling</b> - the 09/06/2013 at 2:56am<b>chargers2588</b> - the 09/05/2013 at 2:20pm<b>noobly28</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 11:05pm<b>shibeep</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 10:35pm<b>larson15</b> - the 06/07/2013 at 3:22pm

heartlessbiotch's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of heartlessbiotch's badges

heartlessbiotch's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend was extremely nervous to meet my parents but I made him do it anyway. One of the first things out of his mouth was, "I'm glad you had sex." When they gave him a look of shock, he added, "You know, when you made your daughter! She's awesome!" FML

by lsababy / 06/11/2013 at 2:46pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I got to drive my mom's car. I'd recently watched the new Fast and Furious movie, I thought it'd be fun to drift around a few corners. I ended up smashing straight into someone's front yard. FML

by Anonymous / 06/07/2013 at 6:00pm / United States / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to get intimate for the first time. He said he didn't want to use a condom, and that I should just give him one of my birth control pills instead, "so we can still be just as safe". What the hell? FML

by what the fuck / 06/07/2013 at 5:20pm / United Kingdom (Ealing) / Intimacy

Today, one of my elderly swimming students ran into me at Walmart. Being a polite teenager, I said hi to him. He looked at me surprised and said, "Oh dear! I didn't recognize you with your clothes on!" I'll never forget the look on his wife's face. FML

by Anonymous / 03/09/2013 at 2:02am / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out who my randomly assigned roommate was. Out of 10,000+ people, I just happen to get assigned a girl who threatened to kill me. FML

by roomingwithevil / 05/09/2012 at 7:26pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, a private number called me telling me to "Beware the water bottles" as soon as a water bottle flew through my open window, hitting me. FML

by waterbottlehit / 12/02/2011 at 12:23am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I drove the width of the country to tell the girl I've lost that I'm in love with her. She wasn't home. FML

by unrequited / 05/17/2011 at 10:36pm / United States / Love

Today, I was in line at the grocery store with my 3-year-old son. He was holding a tub of yogurt that had on it a cow wearing sunglasses. He shouted, "Mommy, look at the fat cow with the sunglasses on!" To my horror, the obese woman in front of us turned around. She was wearing sunglasses. FML

by annonymous / 11/30/2009 at 1:59pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at my school's spaghetti dinner with my family. My brother shook up my mom's soda, as a prank. My entire class witnessed my mom waving around an overflowing Diet Coke while my dad yelled, "Come on, put your mouth on it! Suck it! Suck it, Kathy!" FML

by gbhlaughingstock / 08/18/2009 at 3:20pm / United States / Miscellaneous