hbeeter

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hbeeter

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5959
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About hbeeter : Hey there! I'm Hanna. Send me a message if you want for I love meeting new people(:
BTW I DON'T HAVE A KIK SO PLEASSSSSSSSE STOP ASKING

hbeeter's page activity

Visits<b>msamake</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 2:36am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 2:39pm<b>LeviC</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 10:16am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 5:57pm<b>Austin300</b> - the 11/24/2013 at 10:08pm<b>boudin227</b> - the 09/11/2013 at 6:35am<b>OmgitsJay</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 3:06pm<b>Batgirl124</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 10:13pm<b>c_note21</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 3:57pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 9:05pm<b>jesse480</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 5:20am<b>im_fran</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 3:08am<b>Trollx</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 2:45am<b>Gshelton09</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 7:28pm<b>rob02</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 1:19pm<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 12:53pm<b>jerzjay</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 2:06pm<b>shaelynn2013</b> - the 06/24/2013 at 9:24pm

hbeeter's FML badges

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You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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hbeeter's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend left me for a girl I know. She was the girl my last boyfriend left me for. FML

by itsnotyouitsher / 03/09/2013 at 1:16am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, while working at Starbucks, a man came in and placed his order. I made his drink, topped it with whipped cream, and put the lid on. Some cream was seeping out of the top. He looked at me and said, "Good... you left a nipple..." and slowly licked it off. FML

by Anonymous / 03/09/2013 at 1:06am / United States / Work

Today, my boyfriend's daughter asked me what would happen if she chose to stop urinating for two weeks. She wanted to know whether it would kill her or just start coming out of her mouth. She's 17-years old, and was deadly serious. FML

by Anonymous / 03/08/2013 at 8:11pm / Argentina (Distrito Federal) / Kids

Today, my family threw me my 21st birthday party. My grandma's gift turned out to be a pack of condoms. "Not that you'll ever get to use them," she said, turning and walking off, cackling maniacally. Now I remember why I never talk to the old crone. FML

by fuck you, gran / 03/08/2013 at 7:38pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I showed my wife an article about how frequent orgasms can prevent prostate cancer, as well as increase both partners' overall health. She replied that she wouldn't judge me if I masturbated, as long as I don't use porn. FML

by marriage/celibacy/synonymity / 03/08/2013 at 6:36pm / Norway (Hordaland) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend came over and dropped off my phone, which I'd left at his place the night before. He immediately left in a sulk. As I looked through my texts, I discovered he was only so moody because I hadn't answered any of his calls or messages. I'm dating an idiot. FML

by Kiki / 03/08/2013 at 4:22pm / Poland (Malopolskie) / Love

Today, I bought a textbook for my college class. Not only is the £150 book only sold by our teacher, it turned out to be a piece of shit that he obviously wrote, printed, and stapled together at home. When I went to the faculty about it, I was told it's all perfectly legal, and to drop it. FML

by defrauded / 03/08/2013 at 1:44pm / United Kingdom (Argyll and Bute) / Money

Today, I sat through an incredibly long and tedious class lecture. Just as my professor was nearing the end of his lecture, the resident stoner loudly yawned and asked what we'd been talking about for the past hour. We got to hear most of the lecture all over again. FML

by Anonymous / 03/08/2013 at 12:44pm / Netherlands (Limburg) / Miscellaneous

Today, after about fifteen minutes of my cat bullying me into letting him get onto my lap, I finally caved. He clambered on, turned around, farted in my direction and got off as fast as he got on. FML

by orely44 / 03/08/2013 at 9:13am / France (Pays de la Loire) / Animals

Today, my teacher read my story about a haunted house for a class assignment. She liked it very much and turned it in to the office to be sent into a state writing competition. An hour later, I was called to the office where the guidance counselor called my work "disturbing" and said I "need help". FML

by Anonymous / 03/08/2013 at 6:29am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad and I had an hour-long conversation. When he was getting up to leave my room he said, "Good talk Chelsey." My sister is Chelsey. So I corrected him. He thought I was joking. My father can't tell my sister and I apart. We are not twins. FML

by Anonymous / 03/08/2013 at 5:51am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to discover that the guy I hooked up with last night did indeed have a mullet. FML

by WeHitTurbulence / 03/08/2013 at 1:01am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I finally got the courage to confess my feelings to the guy I have loved for a year now in a long note. He called half an hour later and said, "I'm not going to read this crap, just tell me what it says". FML

by hoolabaloo / 03/07/2013 at 10:53pm / India (Gujarat) / Love

Today, in my architecture class, my professor's lecture consisted of a list of movies and books which feature characters who are architects. I couldn't leave because I needed the attendance points, and it lasted 45 minutes. I paid out of state tuition for this. FML

by seriously wtf / 03/07/2013 at 10:18pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, after my 5-year-old finally got over his grandmother's death, we went to a store and saw a lady that looked exactly like her. She came up to us asking if we saw her grandson; I can't get my son to stop freaking out. FML

by Maxie / 03/07/2013 at 8:55pm / United States (Ohio) / Kids