hbeeter

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hbeeter

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5626
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About hbeeter : Hey there! I'm Hanna. Send me a message if you want for I love meeting new people(:
BTW I DON'T HAVE A KIK SO PLEASSSSSSSSE STOP ASKING

hbeeter's page activity

Visits<b>msamake</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 2:36am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 2:39pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 09/26/2014 at 7:27pm<b>LeviC</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 10:16am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 12/06/2013 at 5:57pm<b>Austin300</b> - the 11/24/2013 at 10:08pm<b>boudin227</b> - the 09/11/2013 at 6:35am<b>OmgitsJay</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 3:06pm<b>Batgirl124</b> - the 08/28/2013 at 10:13pm<b>c_note21</b> - the 08/23/2013 at 3:57pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 9:05pm<b>jesse480</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 5:20am<b>im_fran</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 3:08am<b>Trollx</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 2:45am<b>Gshelton09</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 7:28pm<b>rob02</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 1:19pm<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 12:53pm<b>jerzjay</b> - the 06/25/2013 at 2:06pm

hbeeter's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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hbeeter's favorite FMLs

Today, our dog jumped on the bed while my fiancé and I were having sex, and let out the most horrific fart. My fiancé, like a gentleman, held my nose closed while he continued banging me. FML

by cremyfrozentreat / 03/10/2013 at 9:40am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend decided to get a new haircut. Now, she hates the haircut and blames me for, in her words, "turning me into something I'm not". FML

by Nogood / 03/10/2013 at 5:09am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, I tried to pick up a girl by asking her what the time was as a conversation starter. She responded by telling me it was time to pick a girl more in my league. FML

by Anonymous / 03/10/2013 at 3:52am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were on my bed when things started getting hot and it began to shake. My little sister called the entire family to the hall to listen to "the frogs in the wall". FML

by lolk / 03/10/2013 at 3:41am / United States (Arkansas) / Intimacy

Today, I finally told my dad about how I've been diagnosed with clinical depression. He began to recite a commercial for depression meds, but he couldn't finish because he was overwhelmed with laughter. FML

by depressed / 03/09/2013 at 9:05pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I received an email from my friend in South Africa, with whom I'll soon be staying for 2 months. She was telling me that she had bought me a few things so I would be prepared for my stay. What did she buy me? A taser and some pepper-spray. FML

by Anonymous / 03/09/2013 at 7:40pm / United Kingdom (East Sussex) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm so broke after paying my bills, that I resorted to eating plain garlic butter from the pizzeria down the street for lunch. The worst part: to get the butter, I stormed in and angrily complained, saying they forgot to give it to me. I never even ordered a pizza. FML

by Anonymous / 03/09/2013 at 6:03pm / United States (South Carolina) / Money

Today, a technician from my ISP came to my house to replace my router. He asked for a glass of water, one thing led to another, and for some reason I'll never fully understand, we ended up having sex. Looks like porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. FML

by je_regrette_tout / 03/09/2013 at 1:50pm / Intimacy

Today, I'm 5 months pregnant. My 20-year-old boyfriend still refuses to tell his parents because he thinks he'll get in trouble. He thinks we can get away with "never telling them and just hiding the kid." FML

by Anonymous / 03/09/2013 at 12:42pm / Pakistan / Love

Today, the guy in the dorm room next to me was playing very loud metal music. I went next door and kindly asked him to turn it off. He did, so I went back to my room to go back to sleep. It turns out he was using the music to drown out his girlfriend's very loud moans. FML

by ShittyWalls / 03/09/2013 at 8:35am / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

Today, while at the mall, a lady dropped her credit card while in line to buy something. I came over, picked it up and gave it to her just for her to shove it in my hand and scream, "She's stealing my wallet! My wallet!" The police came. FML

by whaaaaat111 / 03/09/2013 at 7:04am / United States (Virginia) / Money

Today, I received several texts congratulating me on my pregnancy. It turns out that my husband announced he is going to be a father on Facebook, which I don't use. I'm not pregnant. FML

by Quiteannoyed / 03/09/2013 at 5:35am / Finland (Southern Finland) / Love

Today, my boss told me that, while he respects the fact that I have my own style, I have to stop wearing "that hideous wig" because apparently, it "makes the clientele uncomfortable". I don't have a wig. It's my natural hair. FML

by hairdresser / 03/09/2013 at 4:05am / Australia / Work

Today, while having sex with my husband, he went soft. When I asked him what happened he said, "I'm about to fall asleep." He then plopped down on my chest and began to snore. FML

by Anonymous / 03/09/2013 at 3:56am / United States / Intimacy

Today, one of my elderly swimming students ran into me at Walmart. Being a polite teenager, I said hi to him. He looked at me surprised and said, "Oh dear! I didn't recognize you with your clothes on!" I'll never forget the look on his wife's face. FML

by Anonymous / 03/09/2013 at 2:02am / Canada / Miscellaneous