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harrypotter955

Offline (the 08/20/2015 at 5:09am) | Search for a member

harrypotter955

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 5 October 1999 (15 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6337
  • Number of comments : 75
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

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harrypotter955's page activity

Visits<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 12:05pm<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 11:59pm<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 1:02pm<b>nfern046</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 11:27pm<b>Nail7777</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 10:37pm<b>perfect_heart13</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 7:40pm<b>Cheeky_Fellow</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 12:40am<b>joarasmi</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 6:46am<b>dannie_jones</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 8:24pm<b>w0nd3rl4nd</b> - the 06/20/2015 at 6:22am<b>g_willikers24</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 4:52pm<b>the_aspect</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 10:19am<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 9:36am<b>Camlin93</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 8:56am<b>badbitch23</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 11:58am<b>alyssa81296</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 2:40am<b>urbantrashcan</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 3:23pm<b>kaiboi702</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 5:17am

Fucked!<b>kaiboi702</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 11:17am<b>thederpylemon</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 4:44am<b>g_willikers24</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 2:46am<b>Just_A_Fantasy</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 3:12pm<b>SierraaaNicoleee</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 6:37am

harrypotter955's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of harrypotter955's badges

harrypotter955's favorite FMLs

Today, I was walking up to girlfriends house when her terrifying Marine Corps dad threw a football at me. Not being very athletic i surprised myself by catching it. He gestured for me throw it back and i watched it spiral wildy to the left and hit my girlfriends mom in the face. FML

#433084
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74504) - you deserved it (13814)

On 03/18/2009 at 1:41am - misc - by Jaxter (man) - United States (Idaho)

Today, my mother had to take a stool sample because she has been ill for several days. Curious, I eventually had to ask, "how did you intercept the poo before it got submerged in water?". She yelled from the other room, "you know that little plate with the red stripe". I was eating off of it. FML

#327078
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (81863) - you deserved it (6950)

On 03/14/2009 at 7:06pm - health - by imfullthanks (man) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, I yelled at my spouse in front of 20 guests for not coming to blow out his birthday cake candles. Turns out he was in the other room, quietly changing his disabled friend's diaper. FML

#319539
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20716) - you deserved it (202938)

On 03/14/2009 at 11:16am - love - by Noname (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while showering in my dorm, a hand reaches through the curtain and grabs my ass. I hit the person on the other side of the curtain. He opened the curtain thinking that I was his girlfriend. He apologized and he had sex with his girlfriend in the shower stall next to me. FML

#268539
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71314) - you deserved it (3283)

On 03/11/2009 at 3:37am - intimacy - by Noname (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went on my porch for a late night cigarette. When I opened the door and took one step inside, all I remember is a big thud. I woke up 5 minutes later with my Father over top of me saying "nice right hook, huh?" Then he chuckled. He thought I was a burgler and he knocked me out. FML

#268069
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55491) - you deserved it (9040)

On 03/11/2009 at 2:04am - misc - by Noname - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I bought a parakeet for my kids. When I got home and presented it to them, they wanted to let him fly around inside. We went around the house making sure all the windows and doors were shut. Unfortunately I forgot to turn off the ceiling fan. FML

#264253
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32209) - you deserved it (58729)

On 03/10/2009 at 8:10pm - misc - by Noname - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was in spanish class, having a debate about the death penalty. When I went to make a point, I meant to say "La pena de muerte", which means "The death penalty". I said, "La pene de muerte". Turns out that means, "The penis of death". FML

#206263
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29380) - you deserved it (43648)

On 03/04/2009 at 12:42pm - misc - by Señor Guapo (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, a customer opened with "you open bottles with them thangs?" I look around my desk for something he might confuse with an actual bottle opener. His girlfriend then informs me he is talking about my breasts. I work for a bank. FML

#176117
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45000) - you deserved it (3729)

On 03/01/2009 at 9:31pm - work - by bottlepoppin (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, after class I was chatting with my teacher, a really cool and stylish old black guy. I tell him he reminds me of one of those soul dudes from those 70s movies, right down to the pimp-walk. He tells me he walks that way because he was beaten for drinking out of the wrong fountain as a kid. FML

#115273
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23283) - you deserved it (49345)

On 02/23/2009 at 5:11pm - misc - by catfish - United States (Texas)

Today, I was playing musical chairs at a family reunion. It's a well known fact that I'm competitive and tend to hip check people to get that last chair. It came down to me and The Nana. I won. The Nana has a broken hip. FML

#46151
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7501) - you deserved it (64993)

On 02/15/2009 at 10:29am - misc - by nana. (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I stood by the wall at a party while everyone else danced and ignored me. It was my birthday party. FML

#44996
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57539) - you deserved it (10831)

On 02/15/2009 at 12:44am - misc - by Noname - United States

Today, my wife told me that if she had a penny for every time I had brought her to climax she'd have change for a nickel. We've been married for 16 years. FML

#11991
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33561) - you deserved it (12061)

On 02/06/2009 at 5:09pm - misc - by phobopohobia (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I got stuck in an elevator for 2 hours with my boyfriend and the guy that I have been secretly having an affair with for 6 months. FML

#5470
354 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46501) - you deserved it (378358)

On 02/02/2009 at 2:23pm - love - by Noname (woman) - United States (Maryland)



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