happydolphin

Search for a member

Offline (the 08/08/2016 at 7:23pm)

happydolphin

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2460
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

happydolphin's page activity

Visits<b>debmalyaroxx</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 2:48am<b>boredSOLDIER</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 12:29am<b>JD1147</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 6:33pm<b>PinkPoshling111</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 5:26pm<b>Wrex</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 8:34am<b>christian1509</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 1:06pm<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 5:03pm<b>Jay_FTW</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 12:18am<b>mcmuffinman1</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 10:33am<b>tayymeds</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 9:45pm<b>AngryRussianGuy</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 6:59am<b>addictedtojuice</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 6:45am<b>Claytonioo</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 6:34am<b>MWidderAUDI</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 6:24am<b>kneesocks</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 5:37pm<b>dk1991</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 10:04am<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 9:55pm<b>therealjc</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 7:43pm

happydolphin's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of happydolphin's badges

happydolphin's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm doing an architecture course in China. My boss asked me to create a lamp shaped like a shrimp. FML

by Anonyme / 01/29/2016 at 5:38pm / China (Shanghai) / Work

Today, after six weeks of dealing with various exterminators, my roommate and I were about to toast to what we were told was a wasp-free room. That's when we noticed several much smaller wasps flying around. Not only is our wasp problem not solved, but our room is a wasp breeding ground. FML

by OhWait / 10/22/2015 at 8:18pm / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, I was getting coffee when I pulled my lip balm from my pocket and started playing with it in my hands, tapping it on my face and lip. There were there two gorgeous guys in front of me who kept turning around and staring at me. I was actually holding a tampon. FML

by C BOMB / 09/14/2015 at 7:58pm / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was trying to sleep in the car, and when I went to rest my face on my fist, our car hit a bump and I ended up punching myself in the face. FML

by Bengemon825 / 06/20/2015 at 3:03pm / United States (Connecticut) / Transportation

Today, a calf kicked a needle straight into my arm hard enough to make me stab myself. The good news is I'm now fully vaccinated for cow diseases. FML

by ihatecoldfeet / 03/29/2015 at 4:54am / United States (Montana) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, when I woke up, I got into the bath that my boyfriend had prepared for me. I particularly appreciated its smell, so I asked him what he'd used. "I couldn't find the usual bath salts you use, so I just used what I could." It's official, I've taken a Alka-Seltzer flavored bath. FML

by Anonyme / 03/27/2015 at 5:50am / France (Bretagne) / Love

Today, I got my first handjob. I also found out today that a girl can pull your skin hard enough to cause it to bleed profusely. FML

by Anonymous / 03/10/2015 at 3:11pm / Intimacy

Today, I received a rejection letter from a job I desperately wanted. Yesterday, the job offer I'd been stalling on in while waiting for news about this one expired. FML

by badtiming / 03/03/2015 at 12:18pm / Brazil (Rio de Janeiro) / Work

Today, while laughing at a jogger that fell down while running, I choked on my French fries. They had to give me the Heimlich maneuver. FML

by teapotrevolt / 03/02/2015 at 3:40pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Health

Today, while having sex, my fiancé started talking dirty. I enjoyed it, until he had a brain fart and said, "God, you love fucking my pussy." FML

by Anonymous / 02/27/2015 at 2:37pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, while at the office, a surprise Valentine's gift arrived for me, the first I've ever received. It was a box of heart-shaped cookies. From my mother. I'm 39. FML

by FMAhole / 02/13/2015 at 10:49pm / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML

by con135 / 01/12/2015 at 8:16pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, in thanks for my assistance, a customer recommended me a plastic surgeon who could "really help with that face." FML

by Anonymous / 11/23/2014 at 5:27am / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, I'm old enough to be looking at houses to buy, but not old enough to get past the idea that they might be affordable because they're haunted. FML

by boo / 11/16/2014 at 10:07pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, after visiting friends for the weekend, I took the wrong train home. It was going in completely the opposite direction. I've now missed the last train back, will miss work tomorrow and have just been asked to vacate the train station. I'm 120 miles from home. FML

by Quackadoodledoo / 11/16/2014 at 6:25pm / United Kingdom (Nottingham) / Transportation

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.