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hansam

Offline (the 09/21/2014 at 3:12pm) | Search for a member

hansam

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 6 October 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1155
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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hansam's page activity

Visits<b>ForXToday</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 2:15am<b>xXsnowbreezeXx</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 5:05pm<b>ewmoldycheese</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 12:38pm<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 07/17/2014 at 5:22pm<b>olpally</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 2:05pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 8:42am<b>lolnothanks</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 3:15am<b>Jay_FTW</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 10:57am<b>mariannezr</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 12:02am<b>joea21</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 10:41pm<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 5:56pm<b>That_Ginger</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 3:03pm<b>EmmaMK</b> - the 01/13/2014 at 5:14am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 4:46pm<b>The_Tenth_Doctor</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 5:54am<b>sophiaaxxgrace</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 8:59pm<b>paindnsicuas</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 6:00pm<b>foxxakush</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 10:36pm

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hansam's favorite FMLs

Today, a man with a clipboard came up to me in the street to ask me if I was happy with my life insurance. I couldn't bring myself to admit to him that I'm so clueless about my own life that I wasn't sure I was even happy with the Twix I was eating at the time. FML

#20095768
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15991) - you deserved it (3089)

On 09/30/2012 at 8:49pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while shopping, I saw a little girl and her mom. The girl was pouting so I tried to cheer her up by asking her if she was a princess, because she was so pretty. She smiled but her mom looked at me with disgust and told me to, "Get lost, pedo." I'm a 17-year-old girl. FML

#20065720
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29987) - you deserved it (3110)

On 09/10/2012 at 12:39am - kids - by well okay then (woman) - United States

Today, I'm quite ill. My new step-mother believes that the genetic wheat allergy I got from my mother would have gone away since she's now married to my father instead. Looks like dad picked a winner. FML

#20057050
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30511) - you deserved it (1655)

On 09/04/2012 at 4:53am - misc - by hooligyn123 - United States

Today, I found out that my new husband is expecting two children: ours, due in January, and our 16-year-old neighbor's, due in March. FML

Today, I told my son to go clean his mess of a room. He yelled, "Dobby has no master! Dobby is a free elf!" and walked off. He turned 18 a week ago. FML

#19983117
323 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28840) - you deserved it (13116)

On 07/25/2012 at 6:54am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, at the bank, my 8-year-old son decided to pull out realistic looking toy gun, and scream "FREEZE! Give me all your money!" The dim-witted bank teller pressed the silent alarm, and I was nearly arrested. FML

#19962934
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19680) - you deserved it (28626)

On 07/20/2012 at 6:20am - kids - by great - New Zealand (Waikato)

Today, I found out my late grandfather left me a significant amount of money in his will. I thought it was weird because he always acted like he hated me. When I got the envelope, there was $500,000 inside, all in Monopoly money. FML

#19961966
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37650) - you deserved it (3280)

On 07/20/2012 at 1:13am - money - by Rachel - United States

Today, I had to pick my son up from school after he beat the crap out of another student. The words that made him go nuts were apparently, "You mad, bro?" FML

#19607657
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24473) - you deserved it (3675)

On 05/11/2012 at 3:30pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)

Today, during my first day as a doctor’s intern, I attended a consultation. The embarrassed patient asked me to leave. Not really knowing my way around, I went through the first door I could find. By the time I realized it was a closet, I didn’t dare come back out. Twenty minutes is a long time to wait. FML

#19490705
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26839) - you deserved it (5183) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/18/2012 at 4:41pm - work - by bibou2324 -

Today, after a nice swim at the local pool, I ran into a naked girl in the showers. She screamed, kicked me in the nuts and ran off. I still have no clue what she was doing in the men's shower room. FML

#19189124
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38018) - you deserved it (2624)

On 02/29/2012 at 2:18pm - misc - by ouch (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)

Today, my friend and his girlfriend got in a fight while drunk and he started walking home. While driving around looking for him, I accidentally hit him with my car. FML

#18417405
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30464) - you deserved it (9114)

On 12/03/2011 at 5:03am - misc - by Sam - United States

Today, it was my first day on the job as a first grade teacher. One student pushed another, so I asked him to apologize. His response? "If you boss me around, I'll tell Daddy you touched me somewhere you shouldn't have." I think I'm now this kid's slave. FML

#17615072
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36875) - you deserved it (3555)

On 08/29/2011 at 7:59pm - kids - by slavelaborsux (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that as a supervisor, if you reprimand a female worker and end the conversation with "Now get back to making sandwiches." your boss will consider it sexism and suspend you. I work at Subway. FML

#16589228
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53834) - you deserved it (8379)

On 06/10/2011 at 1:01am - work - by MakeMeASandwich (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I started petting my cousin's Doberman. Now, whenever I stop he growls menacingly. FML

#16166972
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31256) - you deserved it (5158)

On 05/14/2011 at 1:44am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my parents. They got quite drunk, and my mom shouted at him, "Have you had sex with my daughter?" As he was shaking his head, my dad said, "I have" in a really creepy voice, thinking it would be funny. It wasn't. FML

#16126147
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64644) - you deserved it (5037)

On 05/11/2011 at 1:17am - intimacy - by Chels (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)



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