hannahisthewin

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hannahisthewin

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 22 July 1997 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5567
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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hannahisthewin's page activity

Visits<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 5:01pm<b>BeepBeepSwerve</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 8:44pm<b>TEZZ</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 3:22am<b>Hazamachi</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 7:00am<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 7:25pm<b>MissVeracity</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 10:47am<b>VVasquez</b> - the 06/29/2013 at 11:42pm<b>Nordrag</b> - the 06/29/2013 at 4:24am<b>Rhendrick69</b> - the 06/29/2013 at 1:51am<b>jello22</b> - the 06/28/2013 at 12:26am<b>erynys</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 6:38pm<b>RainbowInput</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 8:07am<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 1:13am<b>Oxidation</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 11:38pm<b>justmyluck79</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 5:23pm<b>HKCgrimmjow</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 5:21pm<b>MrConcise</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 5:07pm<b>thewhitelover3</b> - the 06/26/2013 at 5:02pm

hannahisthewin's FML badges

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hannahisthewin's favorite FMLs

Today, I was accused of shooting drugs at work. I was only feeding a baby bird that was tucked into my arm using a medicine syringe. I've been smuggling it to work because it has to eat every 2 hours or it will starve. Now everyone there thinks I'm a hardcore dope fiend. FML

by Gribby / 06/27/2013 at 7:56pm / United States (Missouri) / Animals

Today, my sister called me up extremely excited because she found out Flo Rida is from Florida. She's 22. FML

by smh / 06/27/2013 at 7:37pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, on my first day at my new job delivering pizzas, I got bit by a guy dressed as Dracula. FML

by keiran123 / 06/27/2013 at 7:15pm / United States (Louisiana) / Work

Today, I was diagnosed with strep throat. My mom wasted no time accusing me of whoring around and claiming that most people get strep from performing oral sex. FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2013 at 12:58pm / Finland (Western Finland) / Health

Today, I was doing a little victory jig after finally sending out the last of the invitation cards for my wedding when I realised that I had forgotten to put the date of the event on them. FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2013 at 8:13am / United Kingdom / Transportation

Today, I cleaned up my brother's room, since he's moved out. Under the bed I found a Doritos bag full of used condoms. FML

by the_lonely_life / 06/26/2013 at 9:02pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I rode my motorcycle to an appointment and parked in the parking garage. When I got out, some ass had pushed my bike from the spot and had boxed it in between the wall and his car. Apparently, he felt he deserved the spot more than me and didn't care if I wanted to leave. FML

by MadMax / 06/26/2013 at 4:49pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Transportation

Today, I foolishly thought that I was alone in the house, and let out a huge fart on the toilet. This went on for a while due to an upset stomach. I later walked into the living room only to find my parents and a few of their friends sitting on the couch, teary-eyed from laughing so much. FML

Today, I found out my old DVD player is jealous of my Blu-ray player. It fell from the top of my closet and hit me in the head. FML

by Anonymous / 06/26/2013 at 2:57am / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went out on a date with a girl. Everything was going well until I shared how my family was affected by the 2010 earthquake in Haiti. She immediately got up and left, calling me a liar. Apparently, I'm "too cute" to be of Haitian descent. What the hell? FML

by Kn0wledge123 / 06/26/2013 at 1:27am / United States (Florida) / Love

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my husband thought it would be funny to mow a penis into our lawn. I guess he forgot my parents are coming over. FML

by Anonymous / 06/25/2013 at 7:26pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was bored so I began to try to convince my boyfriend that Albert Einstein was actually African-American, and that he painted himself white so he would be accepted as a scientist. Due to his competitive nature, he replied, "I already knew that babe." FML

by anonymous / 06/25/2013 at 2:12am / United States (Minnesota) / Geek

Today, my daughter's obsession with Canada got out way of hand when she was suspended for climbing up the flagpole, in an attempt to replace the flag with a red-and-white maple leaf one. FML

by VictoriaLeavitt / 06/24/2013 at 8:35pm / United States (Nevada) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML

by jgtrflynn / 06/24/2013 at 12:37am / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, I was playing a video game that required me to hunt a few animals. My mom walked in, saw what I was doing, then went into her psycho vegan mode and started yelling at me. She basically grounded me for "murdering" pixels on a screen. FML

by welp, time to become an assassin / 06/23/2013 at 2:14pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous