Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

hannaaaahr

Offline (the 05/04/2015 at 8:55pm) | Search for a member

hannaaaahr

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 6 March 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 10032
  • Number of comments : 260
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

hannaaaahr's page activity

Visits<b>Druu</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 12:52am<b>disasterlydeed</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 5:41pm<b>thejpanderson</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 9:23am<b>adamant84</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 5:57am<b>haiku575</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 3:11am<b>Azurexorcist</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 7:09am<b>weedle99</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 10:20pm<b>Dalboz</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 4:58pm<b>Allusivness</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 11:42am<b>Jayroc</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 9:11am<b>edenxero</b> - the 09/05/2015 at 3:45am<b>foxbryan13</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 3:27am<b>dubb420</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 5:32am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 08/19/2015 at 12:32pm<b>FlendtDK</b> - the 08/08/2015 at 11:54pm<b>WordBea</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 11:20pm<b>beeferjay</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 12:53am<b>JohnnyKade</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 3:22pm

Fucked!<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 9:55am<b>EvanescenceLuv</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 11:15pm<b>zombiekiller52</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 8:23pm

hannaaaahr's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of hannaaaahr's badges

hannaaaahr's favorite FMLs

Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML

#21403147
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35176) - you deserved it (3903)

On 05/01/2015 at 10:22pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was supposed to light candles at my aunt's wedding. I accidentally lit the groom on fire. FML

#21402824
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31447) - you deserved it (6108)

On 05/01/2015 at 9:41am - misc - by why? - United States

Today, my dad gave me the sex talk. After telling me all the stuff I already knew, he told me never to use Durex condoms. He said, "They break a lot. That's the only reason you're around today, really." then chuckled to himself. FML

#21060563
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59123) - you deserved it (5626)

On 02/14/2014 at 5:41pm - intimacy - by accident (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was out with my girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began, a guy approached and asked, "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprised me by saying, "Sure!" As I was about to protest, the guy cut me off and said, "Sorry miss, I was asking him." FML

#21059471
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50170) - you deserved it (7024)

On 02/13/2014 at 8:31pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my two parrots decided that my head was the best place to have sex. FML

#20903328
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45491) - you deserved it (5707)

On 10/01/2013 at 1:32pm - animals - by NestHead (woman) - Russian Federation (Moscow City)

Today, I decided to be friendly and say hi to the weird kid at school, who was sitting by himself eating lunch. After I said hello, he stared up at me intensely and said, "I don't have many friends. Yeah. Mainly 'cause I've eaten most of them." FML

#20895757
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42144) - you deserved it (5354)

On 09/25/2013 at 4:02pm - misc - by scared shitless in ohio (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was getting my cat some canned food. Out of habit I licked the spoon after I had emptied the can only to realize too late what I had done. FML

#20886441
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41303) - you deserved it (18024)

On 09/18/2013 at 10:53am - animals - by OldHabitsDieHard - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I bought a live lobster to have for dinner. When my four year old daughter discovered it in the cooler, she thanked me incessantly for finally getting her a pet. She now won't let "Mr. Shelly" out of her sight. FML

#20883807
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48915) - you deserved it (9006)

On 09/16/2013 at 2:47pm - kids - by meganmagee (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He told me he was a dinosaur. FML

#20883504
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45372) - you deserved it (5718)

On 09/16/2013 at 7:09am - love - by Kit (woman) - United Kingdom (Swindon)

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59768) - you deserved it (29693)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I was home alone and heard the kitchen tap turn on. Shocked, I turned it off. It continuously kept turning itself on so I set my video phone on it to find out the cause. My cat has learnt to turn it on. I later found said cat teaching another. I have three cats. All my taps are like this. FML

Today, after having recently told my 4-year-old daughter that she won't grow big and tall if she doesn't eat her veggies, she decided to pass this wisdom on to a midget that we passed in the store. FML

#20877041
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60316) - you deserved it (9754)

On 09/11/2013 at 2:10pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I was asked to leave a church service for laughing at the kids trying to sing. FML

#20876850
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24321) - you deserved it (80147)

On 09/11/2013 at 9:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, while at the zoo, I found out that the rhinos there can pee backwards, while standing directly behind one. FML

#20874616
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41485) - you deserved it (4391)

On 09/09/2013 at 4:51pm - animals - by Are you kidding me? - United States (Kansas)



FML's blog

  • Eni's illustrated FML
  • Greetings worshipers of lines and colours! This week, with the help of a talented young illustrator we’re checking kids out. No, not like that. Damn, that sounded bad. We’re taking a different look a…

Friday 12 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: