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1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4191
  • Number of comments : 166
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About guitarbeast : I love music, and I love guitar

guitarbeast's page activity

Visits<b>BonerFart</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 6:34pm<b>msk1155</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 7:59pm<b>Cbjhockeyfan</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 10:27am<b>redstone7693</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 6:41pm<b>LordGiblett</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 9:36pm<b>kiaraarreola11</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 8:51pm<b>panromantic</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 7:28pm<b>shmoooopie</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 2:32pm<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 2:55pm<b>Wondermage</b> - the 08/03/2015 at 2:44am<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 12:46am<b>pugpuggy</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 5:45pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/01/2015 at 11:45am<b>Destrukto</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 5:41pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 7:05am<b>MasterPug</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 5:39pm<b>LiveDreamsG</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 3:10am<b>maria95aa</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 1:55am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 1:05pm

guitarbeast's FML badges

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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guitarbeast's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my son for the first time since I had to put him up for adoption over two decades ago. I wanted to make amends and get to know him. Instead, all I got to know was how well he can throw a punch. FML

by me / 01/13/2012 at 8:38pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I guess I accidentally left Facebook open on my work computer while I went to the bathroom, because my boss updated my status to "Unemployed." FML

by Needsanewjob / 01/10/2012 at 10:34am / United States (Arizona) / Work

Today, I came across a picture of my grandpa taking a hit off a bong, while wearing nothing but a Playboy shirt. FML

by mortifiedgrandchild / 01/09/2012 at 1:53pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was going over to my friend's house for the first time. A creepy-looking old man answered, and smiled at me. I asked "Is this the right house? Does Isaac live here?" He replied "Yes, he's in the basement. Would you like a drink?" Right then, Isaac called and asked me where I was. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2012 at 2:34am / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, thanks to some asshole with a padlock, I got trapped in porta potty for over an hour. FML

by stinkyhair / 12/19/2011 at 12:48pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I caught my mother attempting to write a $1400 cheque. To whom? The proprietor of a "Christian charity fund" with whom she had been having Internet conversations. The proprietor's name, and that on the cheque, was "Herp McDerpington". FML

by scammed / 12/18/2011 at 12:18am / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML

by blondie101 / 12/09/2011 at 1:11am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a dream that I was trying to pop a balloon. Nothing I did was working, so I put it between my knees and tried to pop it that way. Immediately, I woke up to the sound of frantic hissing and meowing. As it turns out, I was trying to pop the cat. FML

by furryballoon / 11/21/2011 at 11:46pm / United States (Washington) / Animals

Today, I got into a car accident. The other party left the scene immediately after without exchanging insurance information. Deer can be so rude. FML

by Anonymous / 11/16/2011 at 9:24pm / United States (Texas) / Transportation

Today, my best friend threw my football over a wall, so we hopped over to go and get it. Next thing we know, we're both surrounded by men pointing guns in our faces. FML

by Anonymous / 11/01/2011 at 5:03am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, it's my first Halloween in America since moving from Russia. While handing candy to children, my roommate told me to compliment a little girl by saying "You have a face only a parent could love". I found out it isn't a compliment when I was punched by her Dad. FML

by VladyBoi / 10/31/2011 at 8:18pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, I was bitched out by my 17 year old son's teacher. It seems the idiot teacher made the kids advocate for his own political beliefs in a presentation, and my son ended his speech saying, "And it remains my opinion that our instructor is cramping my motherfucking style." Instant suspension. FML

by Anonymous / 10/28/2011 at 11:52am / United States / Kids

Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML

by adieuvelib / 10/14/2011 at 9:53pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, the boy I like came to my house with a dozen roses to ask me to homecoming. My uncle chased him down the street with a pitchfork. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2011 at 5:52pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I shat a magnet. FML

by mimi / 09/26/2011 at 10:51pm / United States (Illinois) / Health