guitar666God

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guitar666God

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 24 January 1998 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1535
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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guitar666God's page activity

Visits<b>cole_tyler42</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 3:30am<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 11:27pm<b>Jeeper4Life</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 12:43am<b>Denny1</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 12:50am<b>_DoubleJ_</b> - the 08/15/2013 at 7:57pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 2:05am<b>kingwizard34</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 11:51pm<b>haylburg</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 6:49pm<b>blakesinthelake</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 2:34pm<b>chargers2588</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 1:39pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 12:41am<b>Hellostarshine92</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 10:59pm<b>chey4212</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 5:23pm<b>GweedSincE84</b> - the 07/16/2013 at 3:05am<b>awkward611</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 7:01am<b>Zombiekilla3229</b> - the 07/15/2013 at 2:57am<b>alex1010</b> - the 07/05/2013 at 11:31pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 07/01/2013 at 11:26pm

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guitar666God's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up at my cousin's house after staying the night. I went into the bathroom like I usually do and shut the door. Apparently the door lock on this bathroom doesn't function properly. I discovered this when my 4-year-old cousin walked in on me putting a tampon in. FML

by amanderpthepanda / 07/03/2013 at 1:21pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my parents blew my entire college fund in their quest to finish building their replica Hobbit house in our back yard. FML

by future burger flipper / 06/03/2013 at 3:22pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Money

Today, while at my aunt's funeral, my grandma who has terrible memory loss asked me whose funeral we were at. I had to explain to her that her daughter had died. FML

by Me / 06/03/2013 at 1:32am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to eat up a few specks of toilet paper to avoid spoiling "the moment" with my girlfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2013 at 3:17am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy

Today, I walked in on my sister masturbating with my curling iron. FML

by need € for new iron / 05/16/2013 at 3:49pm / Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend from high school contacted me, telling me we should hang out some time; I casually agreed. Two hours later she's on my doorstep in tears, wanting me to take her back. She's married with kids. I live four states away and haven't a clue how she found out where I live. FML

by Anonymous / 04/21/2013 at 7:26pm / United States / Love

Today, I walked in on my 12-year-old daughter lying on her bed, repeatedly opening and closing her legs. I asked her what she was doing, and she replied, "Trying to queef. I saw it online." FML

by reyoflight / 04/19/2013 at 6:04pm / Brazil (Rio de Janeiro) / Kids

Today, there was a new girl in one of my classes. We both corrected a classmate on his grammar, so, trying to make a new friend, I leaned back to her and said, "Haha, fellow Grammar Nazi?" She gave me a disgusted look and told me she was Jewish. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2013 at 6:43am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, my dad and I had an hour-long conversation. When he was getting up to leave my room he said, "Good talk Chelsey." My sister is Chelsey. So I corrected him. He thought I was joking. My father can't tell my sister and I apart. We are not twins. FML

by Anonymous / 03/08/2013 at 5:51am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to discover that the guy I hooked up with last night did indeed have a mullet. FML

by WeHitTurbulence / 03/08/2013 at 1:01am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend started coming onto me, despite me being on my period. He said it was okay, and we went to his bedroom. He told me to spread my legs as he spread his hands. Thinking it'd be sexy, I did. He then yelled, "I AM MOSES! I PART THE RED SEA!" and broke down in laughter. FML

by RedWaters / 03/06/2013 at 3:20pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I found out my girlfriend can do Heath Ledger's "Joker" voice perfectly. I'm not sure if I should be scared or impressed. FML

by nerdgirlmickey / 03/03/2013 at 11:05am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I was taking a peaceful stroll in the local park when a curious turkey decided to follow me. Trying to shoo it away, I swung my leg at it, as if to fake kick it. Being the stupid animal it is, it decided to fly into my leg as I swung, causing my foot to connect to its neck. It died. FML

by Anonymous / 03/03/2013 at 9:40am / Australia (Queensland) / Animals

Today, I was at my class's band concert. Before the curtain was raised, I helped haul the piano to a different spot so a girl who would've had to stand behind it could be seen. I said, "There, now your mom can see you play!" She responded with, "My mom's blind." FML

by Anonymous / 03/02/2013 at 1:22am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I gave birth to my daughter in a hospital corridor. The nurse who took me to my room afterward tried to comfort me by saying there've been worse incidents; she said that two years ago, a lady gave birth in the parking lot. That was me too. FML

by laprochainefoisjerestealamaison / 02/25/2013 at 2:47pm / France (Languedoc-Roussillon) / Health