grogers311

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Offline (the 07/21/2016 at 2:15am)

grogers311

8Fucked!

grogers311grogers311
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2218
  • Number of comments : 85
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About grogers311 : Bass player.
Dad.
Star Wars nerd.

grogers311's page activity

Visits<b>pinkwho</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 12:37am<b>ebroks</b> - the 06/14/2016 at 9:10am<b>pippa247</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 1:49pm<b>Baustigt</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 10:56am<b>LyonDetreny</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 7:51am<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 5:57am<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 1:28pm<b>dillonfi</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 1:38am<b>shanewh40</b> - the 03/25/2016 at 6:09am<b>sorryheadphones</b> - the 01/01/2016 at 12:20pm<b>socalchic420</b> - the 12/13/2015 at 4:43am<b>Jen092</b> - the 12/05/2015 at 8:22am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 8:19am<b>MTJY</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 6:36pm<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 11:28am<b>NeyNeyDaDa</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 10:02am<b>davie94</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 11:28pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 11:40am

Fucked!<b>pippa247</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 7:49pm<b>theBalloonPerson</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 7:38am<b>tha_real_lion</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 11:11pm<b>maydayyparade</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 4:23pm<b>FordGirl98</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 3:46am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 4:12am<b>whitetiger13131</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 5:05am<b>False_Stupidity</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 10:13am

grogers311's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of grogers311's badges

grogers311's favorite FMLs

Today, I was woken by the sound of music coming from my living room at 1:30 am. My cat had managed to turn on the stereo and turn the volume all the way up. Just as I fell asleep again, there was a knock at the door. The police showed up about a noise complaint. FML

by elguapo3745 / 02/29/2016 at 1:20pm / United States (Kentucky) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I came to the realization that I dream more about my vibrator than I do about my boyfriend. FML

by wet dreams / 02/12/2016 at 12:46pm / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, my grandpa passed away. The only emotion my dad showed was anger, because my grandpa owed my dad money. Now he wants to take it from my grandma, like he's some sort of mobster. FML

by failing / 10/16/2015 at 12:40pm / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I caught two kids passing notes to each other in my class, so I told them to see me afterwards. When one of the kids eventually came up, I noticed he was crying. He looked up at me and sobbed out, "I was trying to make my first friend!" FML

by Anonymous / 09/08/2015 at 8:03pm / Kids

Today, I, along with two cops and another paramedic, had to fight to pin down some total scumsucker. He was high out of his mind on god knows what, in his underwear, screaming like a maniac outside someone else's house at 2 in the morning. I don't get paid nearly enough for this shit. FML

by hook me up with some smack, Jack / 08/01/2015 at 2:18am / Australia (Western Australia) / Work

Today, my religious friend and I ended up having wild sex in the back of his mom's minivan. We got interrupted by a priest knocking at our window. Well played God, well played. FML

by Marika / 07/20/2015 at 1:48pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was Skyping with my girlfriend. I was so incredibly tired and just wanted to go to bed, but she just kept talking and wouldn't let me go. I ended up blurting "Your mom's a cunt." just to start a fight and have an excuse to hang up on her. I feel like an asshole. FML

by Anonymous / 07/17/2015 at 8:54pm / United States (Tennessee) / Love

Today, my crackhead neighbour got slightly annoyed at my 2-day-old daughter's late-night wailing. Well, I think so, anyway, as she politely requested us to "SHUT THAT CUNT KID UP." or she would "BLOW BOTH OUR HOUSES UP, YOU FUCKING ASSFUCKS." But I'm not 100% sure. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2015 at 11:51pm / Australia / Kids

Today, I came out as bisexual to my 17-year-old sister. She was quiet for a second, then told me she knows for sure I only have "girl parts". I had to explain to her the difference between being bi and being a hermaphrodite. FML

by Notthatone / 04/21/2015 at 7:00pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy

Today, while waxing a client's chest, I forgot to have him turn his head. When I ripped the strip, I punched him in the face. FML

by waxer150 / 03/22/2015 at 6:32pm / United States (Ohio) / Work

Today, I googled for an hour how to open my CD player on my laptop. Turns out, there is none. They just put a space there to make it look like a CD player. FML

by Blonde / 03/10/2015 at 11:03pm / Canada (Ontario) / Geek

Today, my little sister complained about a young boy in her class always pulling her hair. She asked when boys will stop doing it. My mom replied, "They won't, even when they're grown-ups," then looked over at my dad and shared a dirty smirk. FML

by greatly disturbed / 03/07/2015 at 2:09pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, while laughing at a jogger that fell down while running, I choked on my French fries. They had to give me the Heimlich maneuver. FML

by teapotrevolt / 03/02/2015 at 3:40pm / Canada (Manitoba) / Health

Today, I tried to blackmail my douchebag boss for a raise, since I had ample proof that he's screwing a co-worker. Turns out he and his wife are in an open relationship, and HR doesn't give a damn about office romances. Now I have to quit or deal with the most hostile work environment ever. FML

by Anonymous / 02/18/2015 at 1:06pm / United Kingdom (Norfolk) / Work

Today, while shopping with my 6-year-old daughter, she said, "Mommy, remember you wanna get duck tape!" A middle-aged guy nearby scoffed and told her: "DUCT, not DUCK. Dumb cunt." I ended up having to drive my bawling daughter home with no shopping. FML

by Anonymous / 02/08/2015 at 2:16pm / Kids