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greygloss

Offline (the 02/10/2016 at 10:53pm) | Search for a member

greygloss

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 9649
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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greygloss's page activity

Visits<b>mattymuffins</b> - the 01/12/2014 at 3:46am<b>ashleyylove3</b> - the 11/01/2013 at 7:22am<b>olpally</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 1:22pm<b>jillytc</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 9:44am

greygloss's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of greygloss's badges

greygloss's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried to be sexy by pulling down my girlfriend's panties with my teeth. I didn't expect to be faced with the mother of all shit stains and start gagging so bad I nearly puked. FML

#21522398
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25706) - you deserved it (3651)

On 02/03/2016 at 10:40am - intimacy - by :x (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, after a badly misjudged hand signal, I accidentally hit my boss in the face instead of high-fiving her. FML

#21522381
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18490) - you deserved it (2830)

On 02/03/2016 at 10:06am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, at my job drug testing high schoolers, I see that one of the kids selected for the testing looked incredibly high. So, after he goes in the bathroom and gives me his cup with his urine inside, I take a closer look and see that the little shit jizzed in the cup. I hate my job. FML

#21522183
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23601) - you deserved it (2272)

On 02/02/2016 at 5:53pm - work - by zachhewett - United States (Alabama)

Today, I found out that my tax filing status was never changed after my divorce. This means I haven't been paying enough and now the government wants its money. FML

#21522112
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19604) - you deserved it (3906)

On 02/02/2016 at 1:48pm - money - by sideeffect001 (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I walked in on my son's new habit. Sticking his finger up his ass, farting on it, and smelling it. Apparently, the scent is the purest then. FML

#21521749
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21446) - you deserved it (2032)

On 02/01/2016 at 10:54am - kids - by notsoproudfather - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I accidentally walked in on my sister shaving, naked. I don't know what's worse, the fact I've now seen her nude, or that she looks ten times better than any girl I've ever slept with. FML

#21521379
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23342) - you deserved it (5043)

On 01/31/2016 at 4:33am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I told my grandpa that I want to join the police force. His response: "You wanna lynch some blacks without the jail time, eh?" FML

#21521366
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20450) - you deserved it (2194)

On 01/31/2016 at 3:13am - work - by onlyjuggalos (man) - United States

Today, I confronted my husband about a pair of panties I found in his office. They're his. He put them on to show me that they fit. FML

Today, it was an extremely hot day so I hit up the beach for a swim. Just as I entered the water, the first wave approached me. I tried to jump it and lost my footing, managing to dislocate my hip. I had to be dragged from the water by the lifeguards. FML

#21520345
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19844) - you deserved it (2118)

On 01/28/2016 at 6:42am - misc - by water fail - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I took a swig of my Dr Pepper while having a meeting with my manager. As soon as I was about to swallow, I began coughing, and spat a whole mouthful all over her face. FML

#21520140
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17763) - you deserved it (3308)

On 01/27/2016 at 5:35pm - work - by westwoodcosmo - United States (Arizona)

Today, my friends and I were goofing off playing tag behind the local church, when I heard a banshee-like wail behind me. Assuming it was one of my friends, I wailed right back and ran. Turned out there was actually a funeral going on, and the wail was from one of the bereaved. FML

#21520005
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17710) - you deserved it (7262)

On 01/27/2016 at 8:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend wasn't kidding when she said that if I hit her cervix just the 'right' way during sex, she'd puke. I was on the bottom. FML

Today, I had to convince my parents to shut the door when they have sex. They have done this on multiple occasions. FML

#21519030
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19986) - you deserved it (1408)

On 01/24/2016 at 8:04pm - misc - by helloimkylieee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I twisted my knee while cutting firewood with my grandpa. The pain was so crippling, I fell over screaming. His response? "Quit your bitching, I had my kneecaps blown off in Vietnam. They had to stitch 'em back on." He's never been to Vietnam, or even out of the country. FML

#21518868
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24177) - you deserved it (1969)

On 01/24/2016 at 12:10pm - health - by fuckoffgramps (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out my family refers to my room as "the virgin cave". FML

#21518755
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21536) - you deserved it (2570)

On 01/24/2016 at 12:40am - misc - by Dexter_39476 (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)



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