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ghostlilac

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ghostlilac

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 30 April 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4929
  • Number of comments : 150
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About ghostlilac : green day, billy talent, weezer fan. canadian. have been described as "wonderfully awkward" and "sheldon cooper-esque".

ghostlilac's page activity

Visits<b>johnny692</b> - the 03/31/2015 at 10:40am<b>mukmuk7</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 5:37pm<b>zingline89</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 11:10pm<b>appi</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 1:48pm<b>whitelightning19</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 2:01pm<b>ImBetterInPerson</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 3:49pm<b>lisaint</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 9:21am<b>FaultInMyStars</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 6:52am<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - the 08/01/2014 at 9:00am<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 1:57am<b>Crusher74</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 5:08am<b>redstone7693</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 2:13pm<b>Fuaaad1994</b> - the 12/02/2013 at 6:35am<b>Killjoy4821</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 10:16pm<b>SofiaFaolan</b> - the 10/30/2013 at 9:42pm<b>carriexmichelle</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 8:41pm<b>bitch_plz</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 11:52pm<b>DeOxy</b> - the 09/01/2013 at 1:13am

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You have thumbed 5000 comments.

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You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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ghostlilac's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally had the best sex I've ever had with this really hot guy I've been hanging out with lately. I thought everything was all well and good until he turned to me and said, "You know, your orgasm face kinda reminds me of Steve Martin, but in a good way." FML

#20570614
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46445) - you deserved it (7946)

On 04/01/2013 at 8:18pm - intimacy - by LadySteveMartin (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my dad yet again uttered the words "well, that escalated quickly," while watching the news. He uses this godforsaken meme multiple times a day. I lost my shit and told him to just shut up already. He raised an eyebrow and said, "well, that escalated quickly." FML

#20566988
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21376) - you deserved it (52319)

On 03/30/2013 at 2:17pm - misc - by fuck you dad (man) - Ireland (Monaghan)

Today, I awoke to my husband talking to someone on the phone at 2am. I heard him say, "Baby you're making me hard." Immediately, I asked him who he was talking to. His response? "It's Jake, from State Farm." FML

#20562846
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82603) - you deserved it (8552)

On 03/27/2013 at 7:55pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I found out my boyfriend has a chicken nugget fetish. He wants me to take a chicken nugget bath in a bikini. He seems to be dead serious. FML

#20549296
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46612) - you deserved it (4773)

On 03/18/2013 at 2:10pm - intimacy - by chickenmcnuggetgirl (woman) - Ireland (Meath)

Today, my boyfriend started coming onto me, despite me being on my period. He said it was okay, and we went to his bedroom. He told me to spread my legs as he spread his hands. Thinking it'd be sexy, I did. He then yelled, "I AM MOSES! I PART THE RED SEA!" and broke down in laughter. FML

#20533607
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56039) - you deserved it (14682)

On 03/06/2013 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by RedWaters - United States

Today, my 20-year-old came whining to me, asking why his job interviews keep going so poorly. I had to delicately explain that the "PIMP SLAP" tattoo he had put on his right hand recently may have something to do with it. FML

#20533491
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29896) - you deserved it (4091)

On 03/06/2013 at 1:04pm - kids - by ProudMother (woman) - United Kingdom (Telford and Wrekin)

Today, while working my shift at Taco Bell, a creepy guy started flirting with me. He said, "You remind me of something," acting as if I knew him from elsewhere. I quickly said I used to work at Chili's. He shook his head and said, "No, not a person! An animal. A sloth maybe." FML

#20533458
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29558) - you deserved it (3659)

On 03/06/2013 at 12:19pm - work - by SlothyMolly - United States

Today, my wife packed my lunch. Inside of my lunchbox was a photo of her eating my sandwiches. FML

#20526564
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35604) - you deserved it (6796)

On 03/01/2013 at 2:18am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I stayed in a hotel near the college I was applying for a scholarship. We were eating breakfast and there were some other applicants in the breakfast room. As we walked away, my mother yelled, "My daughter's gonna get this scholarship so there's no reason for you muddafuckas to show up." FML

#20511941
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36345) - you deserved it (3205)

On 02/18/2013 at 9:01am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend taking pictures of his penis in a condom. When I asked him what the hell he was doing he told me that he was making a stop-motion film called "All Dressed Up with Nowhere to go." FML

#20510302
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38858) - you deserved it (9298)

On 02/17/2013 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Notaplacetogo (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I took an afternoon nap, and when I woke up, it was pitch black outside. Still groggy, I went downstairs, only to see my dad sporting a shocked expression and a suspiciously powder-white beard. He actually almost convinced me that I'd just woken up from a five year coma. FML

#20510255
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28628) - you deserved it (6008)

On 02/17/2013 at 12:56am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was taking a stroll in our yard, when my mother decided it would be hilarious to run me down with her Segway. FML

#20498382
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24439) - you deserved it (3323)

On 02/08/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my 17 year old boyfriend's mother bought him a giraffe onesie. He refused to take it off and insisted on wearing it everywhere we go. We live in Australia and it's our summer now. So far he has passed out 3 times in public because he over heated, but he still won't take it off. FML

#20453308
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39684) - you deserved it (6402)

On 01/11/2013 at 6:36am - love - by GiraffeLover - Australia

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

#20448629
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34426) - you deserved it (2779)

On 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm - kids - by ugh (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at Walmart when I saw my grandpa in the next aisle looking at magazines. Wanting to surprise him, I ran up behind him and hugged him around the middle. Up close, I realized he wasn't my grandpa. FML

#20420733
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15402) - you deserved it (26526)

On 12/25/2012 at 6:17am - misc - by Oops (woman) - United States (Maine)



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