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getcrazy's favorite FMLs
Today, after getting into bed, I found a used condom under my covers. I asked my roommate about it. She freely admitted that since my bed was comfier than hers, she had sex with her boyfriend on it. FML
by anonymous / 01/08/2015 at 2:10pm / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy
by justawallflower / 11/29/2014 at 9:06pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, while at work, I was shown CCTV footage of myself staring at the chest belonging to a teenager I was serving. I was accused of being a paedophile and nearly fired, all because I wanted to know what version of Spider-Man was on her T-shirt. FML
by Not A Pervert / 11/03/2014 at 7:00pm / United Kingdom (Peterborough) / Work
Today, I finally got off my lazy ass and start studying for my upcoming exam. It was going pretty well, until my classmate called and after I proudly told him about my sudden motivation, the only thing he had to say was, "You got the date wrong, the exam was on thursday." FML
by demotivator / 11/02/2014 at 4:38pm / Romania (Timis) / Work
Today, I witnessed some greasy twat trying to chat a girl up by negging her, which is basically insulting a woman to lower her self-esteem so she's more likely to put out. "Goddamn negger", I muttered. "The fuck did you just say?!" yelled a black guy standing beside me. FML
by Anonymous / 10/10/2014 at 4:38pm / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, I was pulled over by a cop. He told me one of my lights was busted, and I couldn't help but point out that one of his was out too. He said, "Thanks, I'll get that fixed right away." then gave me a ticket. FML
by Anonymous / 09/29/2014 at 11:42am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation
by SinkingShip / 09/24/2014 at 3:15am / South Africa / Work
by a very unlucky dude. / 06/18/2014 at 2:37am / Canada (British Columbia) / Animals
by i guess / 05/02/2014 at 8:03pm / United States (Ohio) / Work
Today, I thought I'd finally finished the special project my boss gave me of changing the eligibility details on several hundred loans. My coworker later pointed out that the document was the same as it had been hours before, and that the changes I made hadn't saved at all. FML
by workaholic / 03/06/2014 at 11:24am / United States (California) / Work
Today, I walked into my apartment and smelled something extremely repugnant. I asked my roommate what had happened and she said, "I didn't know how else to kill it!" She'd trapped a bat that was in our apartment, put it in the oven, and set it to 400 degrees. FML
by BakedBat / 02/20/2014 at 11:10pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
by unloved cat owner / 02/15/2014 at 7:50pm / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I put a picture of my cat on Facebook. A stranger sent me a message saying how "attractive" she was and that her eyes are "very seductive". So, basically, someone is trying to hit on my cat. FML
by meow / 10/30/2013 at 3:03am / United States / Animals
by Anonymous / 10/12/2013 at 2:19am / United States (Connecticut) / Work
by easily amused / 10/12/2013 at 1:40am / United States / Kids