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gAt_d

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gAt_d
  • Town/Country : kentucky, u.s.a
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 341
  • Number of comments : 130
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About gAt_d : Hello, I'm Derek. Thanks for stopping by. My life: kids back and forth to school, guitar, Misty(love of my life), guitar, writing, job searching, music, cooking, our pug, Neka, and FML!

"If you have love in your heart, let it show while you can" -avett bros.

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gAt_d's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

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gAt_d's favorite FMLs

Today, to help with my insomnia, I downloaded some relaxing rain MP3s and set them to loop. For the first time in ages, I fell asleep within minutes. Somewhere around 5, however, the sound of trickling water caused my bladder to empty itself all over my bed. FML

#20832201
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41052) - you deserved it (5926)

On 08/11/2013 at 1:24pm - misc - by just about pissed off (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, my girlfriend discovered subliminal messaging. She thought that whispering "you want to shave your beard" under her breath while I'm not looking at her, then denying ever saying it, would eventually make me shave my alleged upper-lip hair FML

#20832150
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32331) - you deserved it (4834)

On 08/11/2013 at 12:26pm - misc - by -__- (woman) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, while I was hanging out with a cute girl, I slapped her ass playfully. She told me that she was going to get me back. She slapped my ass later that night unexpectedly while I was holding in a huge fart... It came out. FML

#20832105
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56997) - you deserved it (20423)

On 08/11/2013 at 11:35am - intimacy - by ass slap - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, someone told me that my initials really fit my personality. I took it as a strange compliment, until I realized my initials spell "ew". FML

#20832005
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41568) - you deserved it (3972)

On 08/11/2013 at 9:09am - misc - by ew - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was walking along the beach at night with my family. A huge wave came up and knocked me over. When we got to the van, I realized that the keys that had been in my pocket were now in the ocean. Our cell phones, shoes, and money were in the van. We had to walk three miles to our hotel. FML

#20831839
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38129) - you deserved it (5842)

On 08/11/2013 at 3:28am - misc - by cricketsins (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while working out in the gym, I spotted a very attractive girl. I decided to pick up the heaviest dumbbell to show off how much I could curl. She ended up driving me to the hospital because I burst into tears after tearing up my bicep and deltoid. FML

#20831608
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21637) - you deserved it (57300)

On 08/11/2013 at 12:24am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after swimming in the pool, I went into the shower. Little did I know that my niece was hiding in there. She excitedly yelled "I saw your boobs!" Now my nephew won't stop crying because he didn't get to see them as well. FML

#20831181
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46174) - you deserved it (3345)

On 08/10/2013 at 8:04pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was flirting with a cute bartender on my last day in Spain. It was going well until we somehow got onto the topic of how I was recently dumped by my boyfriend of 3 years via Facebook. He spent the next 5 minutes laughing and telling his coworkers how hilarious that was. FML

#20831150
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37356) - you deserved it (7981)

On 08/10/2013 at 7:41pm - misc - by selfesteemloss (woman) - Spain (Catalonia)

Today, I went to get my hair done. The hairdresser managed to catch my eyebrow piercing in his comb and almost rip it out. I now look like I have a gunshot wound on the upper right hand side of my face. I'm getting married in a matter of hours, and I still had to pay £100 for the hair cut. FML

#20831030
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40929) - you deserved it (13014)

On 08/10/2013 at 5:55pm - misc - by ouchbrow (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my mother-in-law yelled from across the house for me to come quickly. She sounded frantic, so I rushed and asked what was wrong. She said, "Nothing." and that she just wanted to remind me that she hates my guts. She'll be living here with me and my wife for the next two months. FML

#20830989
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43700) - you deserved it (3181)

On 08/10/2013 at 5:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, my little brother told me to give him my phone so he could play a game on it. I said no, because I was taking a call from a friend at the time. He then walked over to the wall, headbutted it, burst into tears, then told my parents that I punched him. They believed him. FML

#20830944
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47308) - you deserved it (2888)

On 08/10/2013 at 4:56pm - kids - by rachel (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I took my driving test. As I was about to turn at a green light, a car sped toward us from the other direction, running a red light. My instructor failed me because I stopped to avoid getting rammed. Apparently I should have kept going, because it was my right of way. FML

#20830853
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55770) - you deserved it (2801)

On 08/10/2013 at 3:28pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was carrying a stack of paperwork at work, when my pen rolled off and onto the floor. As soon as I bent down to pick it up, a nearby co-worker, who's always hated me, accused me of putting on a show and sexually harassing him. He actually followed up by reporting me to HR. FML

#20830800
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40321) - you deserved it (2549)

On 08/10/2013 at 2:41pm - work - by his word vs mine = me suspended (woman) - United Kingdom (Stockport)

Today, while at a private lake, my colon declared a state of evacuation. I ventured as far from my family as my sphincter would allow, only to make eye contact with two very horrified kayakers mid-explosion. FML

#20830594
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40213) - you deserved it (4657)

On 08/10/2013 at 11:23am - health - by Oh-Shit! - United States

Today, my new husband and I were called up to have our first dance at our wedding. While I rested my head on his shoulder, he whispered the most romantic thing to me: "Your breath stinks." FML

#20830424
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43066) - you deserved it (9631)

On 08/10/2013 at 6:48am - love - by fml (woman) - United States (Michigan)



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