fuzzylumpkins19

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fuzzylumpkins19

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 8 February 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 807
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About fuzzylumpkins19 : Currently in college trying to figure out what to study to become a lawyer. I'm into everything from sports to anime and always up to learning about something new. I love reading fmls because they help the work day go by faster. Message me if you want to talk.

fuzzylumpkins19's page activity

Visits<b>SiaJoy</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 5:02am<b>DeathEchoo</b> - the 10/26/2014 at 6:38pm<b>rulezdunmatter</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 12:31pm<b>EmilyJane718</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 4:49am<b>macelonel</b> - the 11/05/2013 at 1:48am<b>EllaJSwiftie</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 1:51pm<b>C3S4R_V4R3L4</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 10:54pm<b>Denny1</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 8:27pm<b>thatotk</b> - the 10/08/2013 at 11:30pm<b>nanamarie98</b> - the 10/07/2013 at 9:38am<b>noelasis94</b> - the 09/25/2013 at 11:24am<b>fuckit_oo</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 8:21pm<b>madisonutecht</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 9:44pm<b>Wormie14</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 6:25am<b>Internetdude</b> - the 09/14/2013 at 10:28am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 09/08/2013 at 11:31am<b>haylburg</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 12:13am<b>chargers2588</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 11:43pm

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fuzzylumpkins19's favorite FMLs

Today, I could hear my daughter playing with her Barbie dolls in her room. "Do you think your boss will agree to give you a raise?", she said. "Of course, we slept together!" My daughter is six. FML

by Poly24 / 08/27/2013 at 6:32am / Kids

Today, a coworker told me she may be in love with me. I admitted similar feelings and we agreed, since we're both happily married, not to spend time together anymore. Two hours later we were both promoted to run the same project, where we'll be "working hand in glove for the next couple of years." FML

by Anonymous / 08/26/2013 at 11:16am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, like every day for the past 6 months, I got a call from the same telemarketers. I've been ignoring the calls, so now they've started leaving me voicemails. I can't get rid of the annoying voicemail icon on my phone without making a call, so I have to pay to listen to their offers. FML

by Sinkhole / 08/24/2013 at 11:27am / Guatemala (Guatemala) / Money

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I told my boyfriend that, due to my low self-confidence, all my bras are push-ups. He yelled, "EVERYTHING I KNEW IS A LIE" and stormed out. FML

by Anonymous / 08/23/2013 at 10:29am / United States / Love

Today, I learned that when a heavily-pregnant friend asks about my progress with the baby socks I promised to knit, it's rather unwise to tell her, "Not to worry, we're set even if it comes out with a few feet too many." She's still crying. FML

by Demotivation / 08/23/2013 at 10:12am / Germany / Miscellaneous

Today, my 50-year-old dad was in a foul mood after taking an online test that put him in Slytherin house instead of Ravenclaw where he "belongs" because he's "so smart". FML

by thanksad / 08/22/2013 at 9:38pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I moved into my university dorm a week before classes start. Everyone kept giving me weird looks as they watched me move my stuff in. Finally, one of my dorm mates asked me if I knew that school had actually started last week. I didn't. FML

by Kingofbosses / 08/22/2013 at 1:31am / United States / Work

Today, at work, I had to utter the phrase, "Sir, please stop rubbing yourself with the peas." It's exactly how it sounds. FML

by twatstick / 08/21/2013 at 1:30pm / United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire) / Work

Today, I got sexual tingles while watching a Subway worker assemble my sandwich. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2013 at 6:46pm / United Kingdom (Sheffield) / Intimacy

Today, I had to endure my girlfriend crying and screaming at me. The reason? I'm not able to please her like the fictional character Christian Grey in 50 Shades of Grey. When she left me, she took all her stuff and left me with copies of the 3 books. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2013 at 4:06am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I was out on a leisurely jog. Out of nowhere, a car slowed down in the street, and a passenger screamed "HAPPY 4TH OF JULY, MOTHERFUCKER," before tossing a lit Roman Candle at my feet. FML

by Your ass... Grab it... / 07/04/2013 at 6:30pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend in public. She happily said yes, and the surrounding crowd cheered for us. About 10 minutes later, after the excitement died down, she leaned over and quietly said, "Actually, I don't want to marry you. I only said yes so I wouldn't disappoint the crowd." FML

by Anonymous / 04/26/2013 at 5:17am / Love

Today, my boyfriend said he felt like eating icing. So I baked him cupcakes, put icing on them and decorated them. When I handed them to him, he picked off the decoration, licked the icing and handed the cupcake back to me, saying, "I told you that's all I wanted." FML

by Cupcakes / 04/15/2013 at 1:11am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that I'm expecting twins. A boy and a girl. My husband, upon finding out about this, immediately suggested that we give them Star Wars names. But not Luke and Leia. Oh no. He wants to name them Darth and Vayda. And he is absolutely serious about this. FML

by AGeeksWife / 09/12/2012 at 3:03am / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

by Anonymous / 09/12/2012 at 3:00am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous