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frozenfreeze

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frozenfreeze
  • Town/Country : Baton Rouge, LA, USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 446
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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frozenfreeze's favorite FMLs

Today, I twisted my ankle during a round of golf, after trying to do a fancy jumping high five. FML

#19327159
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6028) - you deserved it (18834)

On 03/22/2012 at 4:17pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML

#17839732
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35002) - you deserved it (2880)

On 09/26/2011 at 2:52pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up next to my boss naked. We are both women and she is married. Work should be interesting tomorrow. FML

#17839569
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18838) - you deserved it (42232)

On 09/26/2011 at 2:20pm - intimacy - by BigBananaLover - United States (California)

Today, whilst at my job as a lifeguard, a small child decided he couldn't hold it any longer and released his bowels in the pool. It was my job to clean up his dump, including the floating pieces of sweetcorn. FML

#16474774
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30778) - you deserved it (2132)

On 06/02/2011 at 9:44pm - work - by corn - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I got to see my son's dream of being on television come true. Unfortunately, it was because he'd been arrested for trying to rob a bank. FML

#16468673
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34727) - you deserved it (5055)

On 06/02/2011 at 2:43pm - kids - by fuck (man) - United States

Today, I flew home to Germany to see my wife before I'm deployed, only to find her in bed with another guy. She explained that she wants us to stay together, but she can't take a year without being intimate with someone. FML

#16468049
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50719) - you deserved it (4615)

On 06/02/2011 at 1:39pm - intimacy - by jsalmons - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I gave my husband an ultimatum: either he could have sex with me or play Minecraft. Needless to say, he spent the rest of the evening playing Minecraft. FML

#16467610
384 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34473) - you deserved it (12645)

On 06/02/2011 at 12:52pm - intimacy - by minecraftwilldie - United States (Illinois)

Today, while I was in the shower, my curious cat jumped in. She decided she really doesn't like showers and to avoid getting wet, used my naked body as a makeshift tree. FML

#16467206
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26632) - you deserved it (3113)

On 06/02/2011 at 12:06pm - animals - by brittaneejanex - United States

Today, while I was in the shower, my curious cat jumped in. She decided she really doesn't like showers and to avoid getting wet, used my naked body as a makeshift tree. FML

#16467206
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26632) - you deserved it (3113)

On 06/02/2011 at 12:06pm - animals - by brittaneejanex - United States

Today, I had an orgasm for the first time in almost 3 months. My husband was beaming, saying he had given it his all and was ecstatic that he had finally satisfied me. But to be honest, I'd remembered we had a bag of potato chips in the kitchen. FML

#16466460
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30858) - you deserved it (14180)

On 06/02/2011 at 10:49am - intimacy - by satisfied88 -

Today, I was shopping for clothes. I thought this guy was a mannequin because he was standing perfectly still. I poked him and he screamed like a girl. FML

#16464729
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12713) - you deserved it (30605)

On 06/02/2011 at 6:05am - misc - by ohcrap - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a customer had an allergic reaction to the almonds in the sundae I made for her. We're supposed to put the almonds on unless the customer asks otherwise. She complained to my boss that I'd poisoned her. FML

#16462261
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27507) - you deserved it (2901)

On 06/02/2011 at 12:40am - work - by Unemployed (man) - United States

Today, I had to be an observer for a drug test at work. Me and two others got to watch 130 guys take a piss, and then leave work two hours later than everyone else. FML

#16460145
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21550) - you deserved it (1804)

On 06/01/2011 at 10:48pm - work - by evomadrid24 - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got kneed in the stomach by a sixth grader. I couldn't breathe. I have a black belt in Taekwondo. FML

#16452469
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25552) - you deserved it (13584)

On 06/01/2011 at 2:44pm - misc - by Stiny (man) - United States

Today, my daughter turned 18. She decided to use this day to tell me everywhere her and her boyfriends have had sex in my house to get revenge for being overprotective. FML

#16451971
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20611) - you deserved it (56137)

On 06/01/2011 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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