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froggyjade's FML badges
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
froggyjade's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 12/10/2013 at 4:06pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, my fiancé left me waiting at the train station for two and a half hours because he offered his ex-girlfriend a lift to her friends wedding that was a few cities away. I normally wouldn't have minded, but I'm 6 months pregnant and it was pouring with rain. FML
by ali456 / 12/01/2013 at 10:16am / United Kingdom (Dudley) / Love
by Anonymous / 11/29/2013 at 10:37am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML
by I hate that game / 11/23/2013 at 11:11am / United Kingdom (Wigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, after having my sinuses draining for a couple days, my ma stopped by for a surprise visit. Upon discovering the trash can full of used tissues, she called my pastor grandfather to talk to me about the chronic masturbation problem I don't have, but that everyone now thinks I have. FML
by Thors_Hammer9999 / 11/23/2013 at 1:05am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by lax52389 / 11/09/2013 at 6:45pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was wearing a letterman jacket that had my school name and "Okinawa Japan" on the back. A high school kid walks up to me and says, "I can't forgive you people for bombing Pearl Harbor." I'm black. FML
by The_FN_Gunny / 10/29/2013 at 6:31pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
Today, I got married. My husband and I had been waiting until marriage to have sex, and when the time came, we started to undress. As I took my bra off, his eyes glazed over, and he fainted. An hour later, all he could say was, "I don't think we're meant to be together." FML
by Anonymous / 10/27/2013 at 7:46pm / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/17/2013 at 9:43am / United States (Michigan) / Work
by mustabeendrugs / 10/13/2013 at 9:14pm / United States (Arizona) / Work
Today, I again failed to convince my girlfriend that the $100 in our account is the minimum amount we have keep there to avoid being charged by the bank. We have a joint checking account, and the only way to take her off it is to close the account outright. FML
by BlindInTheDark / 10/09/2013 at 2:02pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Money
Today, I was at my in-laws' house, and as I was walking to the living room I had my hands on the back of my hips supporting my back. My mother-in-law told me to stop because it makes me look pregnant. I'm 9 months pregnant. FML
by she knows / 10/08/2013 at 12:30pm / United States (Hawaii) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/07/2013 at 11:03am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at Petsmart with my puppy. Someone tried to pet him. I tried to warn the guy that he is a rescue and doesn't trust easily. He didn't listen and now wants to sue me for a dog bite that didn't even break the skin. FML
by Anonymous / 10/03/2013 at 8:16pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Sunny / 09/18/2013 at 6:59pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got…
- Today, I found out my girlfriend of 5 years cheated on me. When confronted she told me, "I didn't… Today, the office I work at put up a "No Masturbating at Desks" sign. I'm disappointed by this, not… Today, while at my job, I walked past one of my colleagues who has been sick for the past couple of…