Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

forlifebro

Offline (the 05/22/2015 at 5:48am) | Search for a member

forlifebro

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 5 July 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6102
  • Number of comments : 23
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About forlifebro : • Junior in high school
• APSA squad is the only time I will say squad
• I love photography
• I want to be a clinical psychologist
• I wish more people would understand that school is worth the time and stress, even the money's

forlifebro's page activity

Visits<b>Wizardo</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 9:11am<b>Littlest_things</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 10:30pm<b>herecomestheboom</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 4:21pm<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 7:46pm<b>LondonderryAir</b> - the 11/16/2014 at 7:59pm<b>idkwat2useasname</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 10:41am<b>RockUntilYouDie</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 7:48pm<b>cherrio27</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 10:25pm<b>krupa1017</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 3:34pm<b>GreenBeast</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 2:02pm<b>klm2purple</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 1:06am<b>Istah</b> - the 01/01/2014 at 3:21am<b>equitationbound</b> - the 12/31/2013 at 4:20am<b>MichellinMan</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 11:54am<b>mesutozil11</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 10:17pm<b>Mackay92</b> - the 12/15/2013 at 5:33pm<b>specialist8404</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 9:22pm<b>Zephyrrr</b> - the 11/18/2013 at 1:10am

Fucked!<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 1:46am<b>idkwat2useasname</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 4:41pm

forlifebro's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of forlifebro's badges

forlifebro's favorite FMLs

Today, I overheard my uncle talking about me to his friends. Nothing serious, just that he'd fuck me senseless if we weren't related. FML

#21399079
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37113) - you deserved it (2446)

On 04/24/2015 at 3:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Laois)

Today, I complimented a player in a game who protected my ass the whole match. As a joke, I told them to marry me. Turned out the person was a horny 40-something lesbian stalker who spent the next 5 hours sending me pictures and trying to find out where I live. FML

#21398988
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27912) - you deserved it (5526)

On 04/24/2015 at 12:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, the pills my doctor prescribed for my extremely painful period cramps apparently have a side effect; excruciatingly painful cramps. I feel like I'm being repeatedly stabbed in the ovaries with a rusty fork. FML

#21398967
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28639) - you deserved it (2011)

On 04/24/2015 at 11:18am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that, given the correct velocity, a used condom can actually fly through a tiny window and slap you on the leg. I also found out that when you go to the window to yell at the perpetrator, they might have more ammunition. FML

Today, I started work cleaning a customer's pool. I think her husband watches too much porn because he keeps glaring at me from the windows, and I overheard him telling his wife that he knows what's "going on" and that he's "not gonna let it happen". FML

#21397916
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29742) - you deserved it (2101)

On 04/22/2015 at 11:44am - work - by cock blocked (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boss gave me the job of dealing with the guys doing the roofing at our store. His reasoning is that since we're all Hispanic, I'm perfect for the job because "You guys all know each other." FML

#21397904
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28516) - you deserved it (2453)

On 04/22/2015 at 11:06am - work - by -_- (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my religious girlfriend convinced me to let her take my virginity. A few hours later, she broke up with me, crying and saying I was going to hell for having sex before marriage. But apparently she isn't, and she can't be with someone who "tempts" her. FML

#21397889
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32599) - you deserved it (2827)

On 04/22/2015 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my best friend can now say "I fucked your mom" to me and actually mean it. FML

#21397883
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41359) - you deserved it (2819)

On 04/22/2015 at 10:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my dad sat me down and angrily accused me of doing drugs, all because he's noticed I've recently become a lot more energetic and emotional than usual. The truth is, I'd been smoking weed daily for 3 years and just decided to never smoke it again 2 weeks ago. FML

#21397872
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29936) - you deserved it (5227)

On 04/22/2015 at 9:39am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I saw a lady with a stroller in the park. She stopped at the water fountain and got a drink, then left without her baby. I ran to the stroller and started rolling it after her. Two grown men attacked me, accusing me of trying to steal said baby. Turns out it was a baby doll. FML

#21397871
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28610) - you deserved it (2124)

On 04/22/2015 at 9:31am - kids - by ireallylikecats - United States

Today, I came out as bisexual to my 17-year-old sister. She was quiet for a second, then told me she knows for sure I only have "girl parts". I had to explain to her the difference between being bi and being a hermaphrodite. FML

#21397585
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29635) - you deserved it (3142)

On 04/21/2015 at 7:00pm - intimacy - by Notthatone (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my nurse girlfriend told me she's more attracted to the veins in my arm than any other part of me. FML

#21397356
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27947) - you deserved it (3216)

On 04/21/2015 at 9:48am - love - by veiny - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I started getting really bad chest pains at work. I googled it and the internet convinced me I was having a heart attack. Scared for my life, I started to dial for an ambulance when I let out the biggest fart you could ever imagine. Turns out it was trapped gas. FML

#21397265
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26068) - you deserved it (9462)

On 04/21/2015 at 3:55am - health - by Not dying. (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I found out the only reason my parents haven't kicked me out yet is because of my OCD which makes me clean the house every single day. FML

#21397145
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30780) - you deserved it (3133)

On 04/20/2015 at 10:42pm - misc - by Zach - United States (Delaware)

Today, my boss finally did something nice for me and bought me a coffee. By mistake I poured salt in it. To not be ungrateful, I drank it all in front of her. FML



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: