Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

footballguy55

Offline (the 02/07/2016 at 6:29pm) | Search for a member

footballguy55

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 392
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

footballguy55's page activity

Visits<b>Dom_Olivares</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 1:05am<b>mjj99</b> - the 05/12/2015 at 2:09am<b>hereforfun012</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 10:53pm<b>VMG</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 3:58pm<b>808andheartbreak</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 9:02pm<b>mylyfesuksDB</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 8:41am<b>lirideout</b> - the 06/08/2014 at 9:36pm<b>Tiryth</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 5:12pm

footballguy55's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of footballguy55's badges

footballguy55's favorite FMLs

Today, I was babysitting. As I went to leave the bathroom, someone grabbed the knob and pulled the door shut. I figured it was one of the kids and told them to knock it off. A second later, the grip let off. There was no one there and the kids were still asleep. I don't know what to think. FML

#21508063
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23942) - you deserved it (1643)

On 12/26/2015 at 11:54am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out why my history grade is so low: the kid in front of me takes my homework, writes his name on it, and passes it off as his own. FML

#21505155
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22906) - you deserved it (1669)

On 12/18/2015 at 1:16pm - misc - by Tejanoswhy -

Today, I heard my sister screaming from the basement, "Don't you hit me, you asshole!" Knowing her boyfriend was over, I ran downstairs with my baseball bat, ready to smash the fucker hitting my sister. Turns out they were just playing Mario Kart and he rammed her off the edge of a bridge. FML

#21428714
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28279) - you deserved it (4100)

On 06/19/2015 at 6:21pm - misc - by baberuth - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was spooning with my girlfriend. She fell asleep and spent the next 15 minutes farting on me. FML

#21407637
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31503) - you deserved it (4871)

On 05/10/2015 at 4:40am - love - by gassygirlfriend - United States (Idaho)

Today, I took my son to lunch. After we ate, the waitress came over and told me that my son was the most well-behaved child they had ever had there. His response was to pull his pants down and moon the entire restaurant while smacking his bottom. FML

Today, a customer came into our store and asked if we sold "child sized coffins". This isn't even the weirdest question I've been asked. FML

#21140459
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42341) - you deserved it (4519)

On 05/15/2014 at 8:02am - work - by iworkatofficedepothomes (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I received yet another rejection letter from a college I'd applied to. After crying for a week about how lousy I felt, my older sister gave me all 6 of the acceptance letters she'd been hiding. Turns out she's been forging rejection letters and keeping the real ones in her room. FML

#21140332
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71676) - you deserved it (5332)

On 05/15/2014 at 1:40am - misc - by livingamongtheflowers - United States

Today, three different strangers stopped me on the street and asked if I was Brad Pitt. Either there's some kind of conspiracy going on, or I'm the world's ugliest woman. FML

#21137630
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54720) - you deserved it (5363)

On 05/12/2014 at 10:38am - misc - by Lookalike (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, a customer asked me how long our 6-inch sandwich was. FML

#21136526
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45822) - you deserved it (4899)

On 05/11/2014 at 10:46am - work - by Makeitdance - United States (California)

Today, some girl in the street mistook me for Richard Simmons. FML

#21134956
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35734) - you deserved it (5611)

On 05/09/2014 at 4:31pm - misc - by romancocks - United States (Florida)

Today, my brain-dead brother-in-law decided to play five finger fillet while at my place. Predictably, he ended up slicing a finger wide open. My mother-in-law now wants my blood, because she thinks I dared him to do it, and that clearly her perfect little angel couldn't be such a moron. FML

#21134881
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42284) - you deserved it (3777)

On 05/09/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by fmlgirl (woman) - Netherlands (Zeeland)

Today, I was teaching my 4 year old daughter how to use "stranger danger". Later that day, we went out and since I didn't buy her a ice cream, she kept screaming "STRANGER DANGER!" A total stranger tackled me until the cops arrived. FML

#21134481
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50718) - you deserved it (6716)

On 05/08/2014 at 11:01pm - kids - by imnotastranger (man) -

Today, after finishing a two hour essay exam that will determine the future of my career, I realized I misread the question. FML

#21132154
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49470) - you deserved it (12611)

On 05/06/2014 at 5:11am - misc - by IBS (man) - China (Shanghai)

Today, I had an ingrown toenail cut out, and the pain medication I received does not actually help with the pain. Instead, it makes me high, which results in me losing balance and slamming my injured toe into objects and then getting sick from that new pain. FML

#21128289
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44705) - you deserved it (4566)

On 05/01/2014 at 8:23pm - health - by pained (woman) - United States

Today, I hurt my back, and now I have to lie on my stomach for twenty minutes every hour so I can ice the pain. My boyfriend won't stop using my ass as bongo drums every time. FML

#21127987
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43181) - you deserved it (7427)

On 05/01/2014 at 1:31pm - misc - by booty backfire - United States



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: