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foaming

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foaming
  • Town/Country : Bulgaria
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 62
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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foaming's favorite FMLs

Today, while driving home, my 3-year-old daughter told me she had to poop. I told her that she would have to wait until we got home. When we got home, she pulled down her pants and shat on the floor, because, "I'm home now." FML

#21040159
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42352) - you deserved it (8330)

On 01/25/2014 at 11:29pm - kids - by mom - United States (Texas)

Today, after getting a root canal, I told my mother how boring it was just sitting there with my mouth open for ages while the dentist did his work. She then told me how she had to do the same kind of thing on her anniversary night with my father. FML

#20968136
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41240) - you deserved it (3811)

On 11/23/2013 at 4:57pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Argentina

Today, I called my dad to let him know some details for my wedding had changed. It would have been really nice if he had paused the porno I could clearly hear in the background. FML

#20921288
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41057) - you deserved it (2764)

On 10/15/2013 at 6:10am - intimacy - by hes (woman) - United States

Today, while having sex with my wife, my Candy Crush addiction hit me full force, and all I could do was think about possible moves I could make in the level I'm stuck on. FML

#20890032
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20848) - you deserved it (43094)

On 09/21/2013 at 11:09am - intimacy - by CandyCrushAddict (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my dad made a big show of sending me to my room and grounding me for a week. Not because he heard me cursing at my video game, but because I "swear like a little girl" and it embarrassed him in front of his friends. FML

#20889957
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33004) - you deserved it (6087)

On 09/21/2013 at 9:10am - misc - by dadyoureacunt (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I started my new job. Only after I met my new boss did I realise I've met him before. He was at my friend's party last month, the only time in my life when I got so wasted that I danced on a table before puking on myself. He remembers me, too. FML

#20886598
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38366) - you deserved it (10110)

On 09/18/2013 at 2:31pm - work - by Anoymous (woman) - Slovakia (Bratislava)

Today, I bought a live lobster to have for dinner. When my four year old daughter discovered it in the cooler, she thanked me incessantly for finally getting her a pet. She now won't let "Mr. Shelly" out of her sight. FML

#20883807
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41983) - you deserved it (7410)

On 09/16/2013 at 2:47pm - kids - by meganmagee (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52743) - you deserved it (26549)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I was asked to leave a church service for laughing at the kids trying to sing. FML

#20876850
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20574) - you deserved it (70194)

On 09/11/2013 at 9:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, my pregnant wife was crying, so I let her sit on my lap so I could comfort her. She quickly started laughing in embarrassment as she peed on my leg. FML

#20874571
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49564) - you deserved it (5697)

On 09/09/2013 at 4:16pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, after growing my hair out for over a year and constantly being told that it makes me look like a girl, I finally cut it. The first thing my friends said when they saw me was that I now look like a "lesbian." FML

#20874059
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40129) - you deserved it (5127)

On 09/09/2013 at 2:42am - misc - by jessel_ladd92 (man) - United States

Today, my 16-year-old daughter burned all her baby photos because they were unflattering and made her "look fat". FML

#20873371
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44182) - you deserved it (3791)

On 09/08/2013 at 7:20pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as if to prove that there is no end to the unspeakable stupidity of the human race, a patient was brought into my hospital, needing a cellphone removed from his anus. FML

#20872880
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46573) - you deserved it (2737)

On 09/08/2013 at 12:38pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Switzerland (Bern)

Today, I actually had to explain to my husband why his habit of wiping his boogers off into our baby's hair has to stop. FML

#20859193
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41669) - you deserved it (3198)

On 08/29/2013 at 12:26pm - misc - by grossedout (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I caught my sister eating crayons. She's 19. FML

#20858152
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35842) - you deserved it (2343)

On 08/28/2013 at 5:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)



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