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firebabe2014

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firebabe2014
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 38
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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firebabe2014's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

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firebabe2014's favorite FMLs

Today, a girl and I were flirting and it was going well. Feeling bold, I asked what she would do if I kissed her. She smiled flirtatiously and said "Why don't you try it and find out?" I went in for a kiss, and she slapped me. FML

#20965644
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53384) - you deserved it (11418)

On 11/21/2013 at 11:10am - misc - by smooth (man) - United States

Today, I learned that no matter how much of a nerd a girl claims to be, she is not ready for you to speak Klingon during sex. FML

#20963971
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23557) - you deserved it (60293)

On 11/19/2013 at 10:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while I was working out, I was listening to music with my earbuds in. The Pokémon theme started playing and I begun singing along. It wasn't too long after that I remembered I was in a crowded gym on a military base. FML

#20940589
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34843) - you deserved it (9500)

On 10/31/2013 at 7:18pm - misc - by GymBattle (man) - United States

Today, I had to take my 15-year-old son to the hospital. He'd gone out dressed as some My Little Pony character and encountered someone who'd had the same idea. They then got into a fistfight, and my son got the shit beaten out of him. I wish I'd never bred. FML

#20940283
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38605) - you deserved it (7827)

On 10/31/2013 at 2:27pm - kids - by anna (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I had to call a plumber out to clear a blockage in our bathroom drainpipe. After coming back from work later in the day, and after a tearful confession from my wife, I found out that pipe wasn't the only one he snaked. FML

#20932505
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52719) - you deserved it (3259)

On 10/24/2013 at 4:06pm - misc - by soon to be divorced (man) - United States

Today, I found out through one of my friends that my boyfriend cheated on me. He says it doesn't count as cheating because he couldn't get it up. FML

#20930754
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43569) - you deserved it (3055)

On 10/23/2013 at 3:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my two parrots decided that my head was the best place to have sex. FML

#20903328
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38420) - you deserved it (4639)

On 10/01/2013 at 1:32pm - animals - by NestHead (woman) - Russian Federation (Moscow City)

Today, I went skinny-dipping with my friends. At one point, I jokingly pointed out how one of them had the smallest boobs of us all. She calmly got out of the pond, dried herself, scooped up our clothes and phones, and drove off in her car. The cops she called arrived soon after. FML

#20861665
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21286) - you deserved it (62768)

On 08/31/2013 at 12:25pm - misc - by criminal tit offender - United States (Alabama)

Today, I got sexual tingles while watching a Subway worker assemble my sandwich. FML

#20846728
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39408) - you deserved it (8527)

On 08/20/2013 at 6:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, out of partying reflex, I downed Communion wine like a vodka shot. FML

#20830409
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21968) - you deserved it (42568)

On 08/10/2013 at 6:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I sprayed down some ants in my house. In the sea of ant corpses was a single living ant seemingly cradling a dead one in its arms. I'm convinced I just became the villain in an epic tragedy. Now I have to live with my ant problem because I can't bear to tear another family apart. FML

#20824961
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44193) - you deserved it (20773)

On 08/07/2013 at 1:40am - animals - by Blood on my hands (woman) - United States

Today, I crawled into bed with my boyfriend. He was snoring loudly which is how I knew he was passed out cold. Once I was under the blanket next to him, he slowly turned over, stared me straight in the face and said, "I have to kill you". Then started snoring again. FML

Today, after more than six years of working my ass off, I finally summoned the courage to ask my boss for a raise. She just chuckled, "I'm gonna need you to eat a dick, John." and stared at me unblinking until I awkwardly left. FML

#20790691
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42991) - you deserved it (3270)

On 07/18/2013 at 3:53pm - work - by no new apartment for me (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my girlfriend guilted me into roleplaying as Justin Bieber before and during sex. I now feel physically ill. FML

#20788707
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55440) - you deserved it (18775)

On 07/17/2013 at 4:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was out on a leisurely jog. Out of nowhere, a car slowed down in the street, and a passenger screamed "HAPPY 4TH OF JULY, MOTHERFUCKER," before tossing a lit Roman Candle at my feet. FML

#20763905
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42718) - you deserved it (3690)

On 07/04/2013 at 6:30pm - health - by Your ass... Grab it... (man) - United States (Texas)



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