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Offline (the 04/24/2016 at 7:11am)



  • Town/Country : Eugene, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 13 April 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1346
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 11 posted

About fionabean : My dog is rad

fionabean's page activity

Visits<b>Jake42100</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 10:36pm<b>Xaian1</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 10:20am<b>nhatt</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 4:04pm<b>TexasDiesel97</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 6:08am<b>AyeTee77</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 3:06am<b>apineapple</b> - the 10/29/2015 at 11:02pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 10/29/2015 at 10:10pm<b>Mons</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 4:41am<b>cpmagma</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 10:10am<b>Jayroc</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 5:04am<b>mickey2015</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 12:15am<b>christofferkamal</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 11:28am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 11:24am<b>tranced_</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 10:52am<b>Cherhorowitz</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 8:58am<b>minutepoet</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 2:34am<b>edmunson</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 2:19am<b>youngindian</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 1:24am

Fucked!<b>apineapple</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 4:02am<b>nhatt</b> - the 10/26/2015 at 5:07am<b>AyeTee77</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 1:31pm<b>cpmagma</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 4:10pm<b>TexasDiesel97</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 11:59am<b>tranced_</b> - the 10/18/2015 at 4:52pm<b>DarkJediLove</b> - the 10/10/2015 at 5:58pm<b>kittykittyrun</b> - the 09/15/2015 at 4:06pm<b>brkopplin</b> - the 09/12/2015 at 8:36pm<b>Seabass_Chan</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 5:35am

fionabean's FML badges

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fionabean's favorite FMLs

Today, I was roused from my peaceful slumber by the sound of evil laughter coming from my closet. It was my old Furby, with dead batteries, that I could have sworn I got rid of several years ago. FML

Today, my boyfriend tried to rid me of my hiccups. As he'd screamed at me and I'd pissed my pants, I just burst into tears. FML

by catt / 10/17/2014 at 4:12pm / Germany (Berlin) / Health

Today, my dad told me someday I'll find a man who wants a nice lumberjack for a wife. FML

by axewoman / 10/17/2014 at 4:14am / Love

Today, I was leading a tour of my university and saw a girl in ripped jeans and combat boots smoking a cigarette. I told her that she shouldn't be representing the school in such a manner. She shot back: "I'm a Presidential Scholar. Suck my dick, bitch." FML

by Anonymous / 10/15/2014 at 1:07pm / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, a guy told me I "kind of look like a girl" if he looked at me from the right angle. Well, I am a girl, and this is the closest thing to a compliment that I've gotten in years. FML

by MikaykayUnicorn / 09/21/2014 at 10:57am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

by not a dick-man / 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I found a wasp in my kitchen, so I opened the back door and left the room for 10 minutes in the hope that it would fly away. Upon returning, I found that there were now three wasps, a vicious cat and a very panicked pigeon crashing around the room. FML

by Snow-White / 07/03/2014 at 8:27pm / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Animals

Today, I had to kick my own father out of my house after he started attacking my wife for breastfeeding our newborn son in the living room. All the way to the door, he ranted that "You don't see me whipping my dick out and pissing in front of everyone, do you?" FML

by Q / 05/20/2014 at 1:27pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom discovered a new way to get over her breakup: yodelling. FML

by shylahrc / 05/03/2014 at 7:51pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my non-English-speaking grandma bought me a new t-shirt. It would've been sweet if it didn't have the word "bondage" written on the back in pretty, bold letters. I had no choice but to wear it while we went shopping. FML

by Anonymous / 03/23/2014 at 12:59pm / Egypt / Miscellaneous

Today, I locked myself out and had to enter my house via the back door. Thinking I was an intruder, my 7-year-old daughter slammed a metal rake into the back of my head. Nice to know she can take care of herself. FML

by emergencyroom / 03/15/2014 at 8:21am / United States (Maryland) / Kids

Today, I was so tired that I fell asleep on a bus. When I awoke suddenly, half of the bus was staring at me, with some people chuckling and smiling. I have no idea what I did. FML

by Anonymous / 03/12/2014 at 11:33am / United States / Transportation

Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2014 at 10:47am / United States (Missouri) / Kids

Today, in the very middle of the night, my kitten started rubbing against my face. Thinking I saw her face in the darkness, I decided to kiss her before going back to bed. My lips made contact with her butthole. FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2014 at 10:20am / United States (Nevada) / Animals

Today, I was walking home from a horrible day at work, when some idiot emptied a trashcan on my head from his apartment balcony. He cried "Oh shit!" and apologized because I wasn't his intended target. FML

by Anonymous / 01/12/2014 at 12:28pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous