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feedmankeynow

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feedmankeynow
  • Town/Country : Dallas, Texas
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 September 1998 (15 years)
  • Number of visits : 810
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About feedmankeynow : .

feedmankeynow's last visitors

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feedmankeynow's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of feedmankeynow's badges

feedmankeynow's favorite FMLs

Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML

#17919622
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35932) - you deserved it (9555)

On 10/06/2011 at 12:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, while my boyfriend was asleep, I gave him a soft kiss and whispered how handsome and gentle he looked. His response, still asleep, was to roll over and let out a massive fart. FML

#17919318
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23349) - you deserved it (1467)

On 10/06/2011 at 11:23am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I'd just finished feeding my parrot and sweeping all the seeds under the cage. As I was walking away, my parrot whistled. I turned around to see him get up onto the food dish, pick up a clawful of food and toss it on the floor. FML

Today, I applied for a job as a dishwasher. I was denied because I don't have enough experience. FML

#17903490
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23743) - you deserved it (2104)

On 10/04/2011 at 12:18pm - work - by SimpleSwimmer - United States (California)

Today, a man punched me for sleeping with his wife. Bewildered, I insisted I would never sleep with a married woman, to which he retorted "She wasn't my wife when it HAPPENED, dumbass!" I was assaulted for sleeping with my own girlfriend three years ago. FML

#17848518
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41016) - you deserved it (3192)

On 09/27/2011 at 3:53pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I shat a magnet. FML

#17843744
287 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10056) - you deserved it (27699)

On 09/26/2011 at 10:51pm - health - by mimi - United States (Illinois)

Today, I saw what I thought was a spider. Wanting to kill it as quickly as possible, I smacked my hand against the wall with force. It was a nail. FML

#17843188
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15836) - you deserved it (25938)

On 09/26/2011 at 10:03pm - health - by Jesus (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my mom put me in an anger management class because I said "crap." FML

#17729404
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27494) - you deserved it (2631)

On 09/12/2011 at 5:37pm - misc - by siikman313 - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night feeling sick. I went to the bathroom and knelt in front of the toilet, waiting to throw up. When I finally did, I violently shit my pants at the same time. I was at my friend's house. FML

#17714662
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33713) - you deserved it (2688)

On 09/10/2011 at 9:54pm - health - by sadddddd (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, I brought my date home to meet my parents. We walked in the front door to find my drunken father wearing nothing but a Viking helmet, and swinging and jabbing our living room furniture with a pool noodle. FML

#17711935
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24115) - you deserved it (2417)

On 09/10/2011 at 3:01pm - misc - by Hailey Antone - United States

Today, I visited my son at work. He's an interpreter for the government. As I watched him converse with a group of men, I was overcome with pride. Then the woman next to me said "I can't believe they're talking about that in public." They were discussing masturbation techniques. FML

#17625902
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29458) - you deserved it (3229)

On 08/30/2011 at 11:30pm - intimacy - by mystupidson (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got woken up by a text from an unknown number at 3 am saying, "haha I found your number." I ignored it and tried to go back to sleep. After hours of trying to fall asleep, my drowsiness was disturbed by another text from the same person saying, "Sorry, wrong number." FML

#17516576
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22866) - you deserved it (3577)

On 08/19/2011 at 2:38am - misc - by Reena (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, a downstairs neighbor of mine claimed money from me because apparently my dog took a dump on the fire escape, and the poop fell through the grates and on her groceries. I don't have a dog, but I paid the money anyway, because I was too ashamed to tell her it was my husband. FML

#17421184
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35022) - you deserved it (7812)

On 08/09/2011 at 6:55pm - animals - by Zoe Avila - United States

Today, I took my kids to the circus. We were having fun, right up until the point they saw an old man dressed as a clown, at which point they screamed, grabbed onto my shorts, and managed to accidentally pull them down. FML

#17396996
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20173) - you deserved it (2599)

On 08/07/2011 at 1:14pm - kids - by SheaLili - United States (California)

Today, I was at the airport. A creepy man smiled at me, so I politely smiled back. I then realized his shirt said "Smile if you take it in the ass." He then winked at me and walked off. FML

#17315983
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34543) - you deserved it (11902)

On 07/31/2011 at 1:11am - intimacy - by creepedout - United States



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