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feedmankeynow

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feedmankeynow
  • Town/Country : Dallas, Texas
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 1 September 1998 (15 years)
  • Number of visits : 816
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About feedmankeynow : .

feedmankeynow's last visitors

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feedmankeynow's FML badges

Consolation prize

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Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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feedmankeynow's favorite FMLs

Today, while walking to work, I swore I saw one of my old friends from college standing in the park across the street. I started shouting her name and waving my hands like a maniac to get her attention. It was a statue. FML

#19447038
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9041) - you deserved it (21568)

On 04/10/2012 at 11:49pm - misc - by Becca (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I punched myself in the face while trying to put my bra on. FML

Today, my morning sickness decided to show itself every time I smell coffee. I work at a coffee shop. FML

Today, I introduced my mother to my new girlfriend. My mom made a very nasty comment about her in Spanish, not realizing that my girlfriend teaches Spanish at the local school. FML

#19385390
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30497) - you deserved it (2246)

On 03/31/2012 at 11:01pm - love - by spanishsucks - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I flew to Florida with my grandma. She tried to go through airport security with a pocket knife in her backpack. FML

#19369663
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19056) - you deserved it (1625)

On 03/29/2012 at 12:19pm - misc - by yelyah - United States (Illinois)

Today, my girlfriend decided to pleasure me with a handjob. It was incredibly painful because she didn't understand that my foreskin isn't as flexible as she thought it to be. I didn't have the heart to tell her to stop until she asked, "Is it supposed to turn this color?" FML

#19336672
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20917) - you deserved it (7626)

On 03/24/2012 at 1:30am - intimacy - by purple - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked into the kitchen to eat some breakfast. I got a full visual of my drunk neighbor dancing naked in my backyard. FML

#19297071
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19893) - you deserved it (1664)

On 03/17/2012 at 10:41pm - misc - by vanorav (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to Hooters for lunch. My food was brought to me by a man. FML

#19288594
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20806) - you deserved it (12871)

On 03/16/2012 at 1:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up Tard Mode and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML

#19264126
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25997) - you deserved it (5669)

On 03/12/2012 at 12:27pm - love - by yamsterr (man) - United States

Today, I got burned, all because the toaster scared me while I was holding a pot of boiling water. FML

#19237523
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18400) - you deserved it (5772)

On 03/08/2012 at 2:13am - misc - by thatchick3333 - United States (California)

Today, I was having a pleasant jog, that is until I was struck by the terrible feeling of an oncoming turd. Being only about 20 minutes from home, I thought I could make it back without letting the beast out. I was so wrong. The only thing I'm grateful for is that I was carrying the Sunday paper. FML

#19207356
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19204) - you deserved it (3001)

On 03/03/2012 at 3:27am - health - by fingerhut - United States (California)

Today, in bio class, we were studying the reproductive system. I don't like talking about this stuff, and I twitched every time my teacher said "penis" or "vagina." When I told my family, they laughed and kept repeating those words just to see me twitch. FML

#19182988
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8230) - you deserved it (28222)

On 02/28/2012 at 4:03pm - misc - by kal - United States (New York)

Today, I was attacked by a bird at 3 in the morning. The bird was being attacked by an owl, and decided the safest place to land wasn't in a tree, but my face. No-one will believe me, despite the 12 stitches across my face. FML

#19026198
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21510) - you deserved it (1723)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:45pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, some guy hit my car and then threatened to sue me for "parking my car in such a way that it was impossible not to hit it." My car was in the driveway. FML

#18998594
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23174) - you deserved it (1373)

On 02/05/2012 at 3:08am - misc - by dreefsa - United States (California)

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

#18974920
215 comments


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