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fatman1970

Offline (the 03/25/2015 at 3:18pm) | Search for a member

fatman1970

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 14 January 1970 (45 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3866
  • Number of comments : 149
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About fatman1970 : Balding, overweight and ugly!

fatman1970's page activity

Visits<b>Epiccake</b> - yesterday at 12:34am<b>neonvortex</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 5:53pm<b>SiRiSpartan</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 12:00am<b>silveronica5</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 12:46am<b>giantdbloom</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 1:33am<b>Toughsky</b> - the 07/14/2014 at 9:57pm<b>singer0421</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 3:12am<b>swick25</b> - the 04/06/2014 at 10:20pm<b>i_love_him_</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 10:50pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 5:04pm<b>SamanthaaNicolee</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 5:21pm<b>beaglegal</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 5:00pm<b>Trekos</b> - the 10/03/2013 at 10:41am<b>NightSkyRider</b> - the 08/04/2013 at 4:54pm<b>laurenzie</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 11:34pm<b>k_gils</b> - the 07/23/2013 at 12:59pm<b>xTrepidation</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 8:20pm<b>tegraturbo2000</b> - the 06/20/2013 at 1:20pm

fatman1970's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of fatman1970's badges

fatman1970's favorite FMLs

Today, as I was trying to remove my lunch from the hot oven tray, my finger brushed against the metal for a moment, and I instinctively put it in my mouth. I burnt my tongue, on my finger. I didn't realize that was possible. FML

#21373551
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28456) - you deserved it (3863)

On 03/13/2015 at 12:19am - health - by numbtongue - New Zealand (Otago)

Today, my mother-in-law sent me a pedometer for my birthday. I've been confined to a wheelchair for most of my life. FML

#21360985
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32018) - you deserved it (1776)

On 02/22/2015 at 11:09am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I asked my dad to please shave his awful beard, because I'm a laughing-stock at school for being picked up each day by a guy whose face looks like Bigfoot's ass. He agreed, and 10 minutes later was sporting a pedo-stache. It's going to be a long year. FML

#21354177
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27197) - you deserved it (9743)

On 02/11/2015 at 4:00pm - misc - by assholedad (man) - United States

Today, my coworker pointed to our nervous new intern and asked who he was. I jokingly said, "Can't you tell? He's our new slave." I then quickly realized how bad that sounded, given the intern is black. FML

#21327404
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26667) - you deserved it (15622)

On 12/30/2014 at 8:39pm - work - by smooth - United States

Today, I met my new roommate. I hadn't even gotten her name yet, because the first thing she said to me instead was that she wanted to hang her confederate flag on the wall. I'm black. FML

#21326235
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35534) - you deserved it (4293)

On 12/29/2014 at 12:00am - misc - by okay17 - United States

Today, I asked my spouse to help me apply some hemorrhoid relief cream, since I couldn't see what was going on down there clearly. Next time, I hope I'll remember if I'm still in a conference call with my online classmates so they don't witness the whole thing again. FML

Today, I won a gruelling fitness competition, only to find out the mystery prize was a voucher to get 10 free spray tans. I'm black. FML

#21249089
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48309) - you deserved it (3995)

On 08/31/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by disappointedjamaican - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, my blind date turned out to be my gynecologist. FML

#21229613
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50044) - you deserved it (4312)

On 08/04/2014 at 10:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, a new session started for my swimming squad. I walked down to the pool, tripped over a stray equipment bag, and belly-flopped into the pool in front of everyone, fully clothed. I'm the coach. FML

#21225439
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40339) - you deserved it (4661)

On 07/31/2014 at 1:00am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, it's my birthday. My next-door neighbours gave me a stool and some rope. FML

#21194564
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56288) - you deserved it (5217) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/01/2014 at 12:55am - love - by NosChersVoisins - France (Aquitaine)

Today, I broke my nose trying to pop a zit. FML

#21168348
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45637) - you deserved it (20712)

On 06/09/2014 at 3:36pm - health - by blanknameisblank (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, out of habit from twelve years of karate classes, I bowed to my teacher as I exited my classroom. My chemistry classroom. FML

#21156297
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40722) - you deserved it (6539)

On 05/29/2014 at 7:32pm - work - by mathesonn - United States (New York)

Today, thanks to my phone's shitty predictive text combined with me being half-asleep, I accidentally offered my heartbroken buddy "oral support" if he ever needs it. FML

#21151390
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45817) - you deserved it (8881)

On 05/25/2014 at 5:23pm - intimacy - by whoops (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my guide dog sneezed so hard that it slammed its head on the floor and knocked itself out. I have to trust this dog with my life. FML

#21117679
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51796) - you deserved it (4533)

On 04/20/2014 at 12:03am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today, I accidentally let a huge one rip while tending to an older patient at the nursing home where I work. The patient passed away shortly thereafter. Coincidence? FML

#21116703
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41707) - you deserved it (6686)

On 04/18/2014 at 9:19pm - work - by Anonymous - Norway (Nordland)



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