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fantita495's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 04/20/2013 at 12:34pm / Thailand / Kids
Today, I posted a video of a dance I choreographed on Facebook. I got a notification a few hours later telling me that my grandpa had also shared it. His caption? "My granddaughter dances like a gay baboon and this dance sucks balls. Throw grapes at her." Thanks grandpa. FML
by thanks gramps / 04/19/2013 at 3:27am / Canada (Yukon Territory) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was late to a lecture when I tripped up the stairs. With a few hundred people already staring and laughing at me, I started to curtsy to my "adoring fans" but instead fell backwards down the massive flight of stairs. FML
by Anonymous / 03/25/2013 at 2:03am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
by And I'm still single / 03/24/2013 at 4:59am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out why my boyfriend likes to do my hair and makeup for me. Far from it being some kind of fetish or hobby, it's because he thinks I do such a crappy job that feels he has to apply it himself so I don't "embarrass" him when we're out in public together. FML
by Anonymous / 03/14/2013 at 5:01pm / Germany (Thuringen) / Love
by itsnotyouitsher / 03/09/2013 at 1:16am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
by ForeverAlone / 03/06/2013 at 5:28pm / United States (Missouri) / Love
by Anonymous / 03/01/2013 at 2:18am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was terribly late for class, so I rushed to the classroom door, thinking it was unlocked. I smacked face-first into the glass, and awkwardly fell to the floor. Once I got back up, I peeked through the glass, only to realise it wasn't even my class. FML
by nosebleeder / 02/13/2013 at 3:31pm / Sweden / Miscellaneous
Today, I got permission from my parents for my boyfriend to stay over. Things got intimate, and I tried my hardest not to make too much noise. However, while having a post-sex cuddle, we heard my parents in the next room muttering about my "faking". FML
by Anonymous / 02/09/2013 at 12:08am / United Kingdom (Somerset) / Intimacy
by katelynm / 02/08/2013 at 1:24am / United States / Love
by PokeWife / 02/06/2013 at 8:38am / United States (Nebraska) / Love
Today, the police arrived at my door, telling me my child had been caught vandalizing. A boy who looked about 15 hugged me and said, "Hey, mum". I'm only 26 years old and had never seen this boy in my life. FML
by Female / 01/22/2013 at 6:16pm / Australia (Victoria) / Kids
Today, my mum excitedly discussed with me the prospect of starting a mother-son YouTube duo. Thinking she was joking, I went along with it. She is now installing a 24-hour webcam in the house to record our conversations, which she perceives as hilarious, and is going to upload them. FML
by Anonymous / 01/14/2013 at 5:06am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, I caught my boyfriend wearing yoga pants and taking pictures of his butt to post on a "Girls in yoga pants" site. He saw my expression and said, "Nah, it's cool, I hid my junk so they'll think it's a chick!" FML
by Amy / 01/10/2013 at 12:09am / United States / Intimacy
- Today, on the road in China, I committed a small offense. A cop saw me, stopped me and told me that… Today, I’m in Sweden. This morning, I went out to get the mail in my pajamas. Well, it doesn’t only… Today, I’m a French teacher in Ukraine, and in class we were debating gun legislation. In order to…