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f_ckml432's FML badges
One ring to rule them all
You submitted an FML that was successfully published on the website. This makes you an exceptional human being.
Back from a party
An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
f_ckml432's favorite FMLs
Today, as I was waiting for my girlfriend in the street, I saw a woman who looked a lot like her. I ran towards her, my arms in the air ready to give her a hug, only to realise it wasn't her. I then had to pass the woman, my arms in the air, still running. FML
by minibuch1505 / 09/21/2012 at 7:31am / Miscellaneous
Today, I was sitting in on a boring presentation at work. I yawned and shifted in my chair, accidentally sitting on my testicles. I shrieked in pain and spent the next five minutes choking back tears, while my boss told me to shut my mouth and stop fucking around. FML
by kevcng / 09/10/2012 at 5:20pm / United States / Work
Today, I was watching some pretty intense porn on my Macbook. I unplugged the second monitor so I could lie on my bed. Instead of defaulting to the screen, Airplay somehow synced it to the living room TV, where the rest of my family was watching a movie. FML
by WhyAppleWhy / 09/01/2012 at 7:14pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by thewhompingwillow / 09/01/2012 at 1:56pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
Today, my sister, knowing that I'm terrified of his face, taped a picture of Michael Jackson over our toilet. When I entered the washroom, I sprinted back out screaming. Minutes later, while in the shower, I happened to glance up at the ceiling. Guess who was grinning down at me. FML
by ugh / 06/08/2012 at 12:35am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by boohoo / 06/04/2012 at 8:45am / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Love
Today, I found out that my colleagues had replaced my email auto-responder with a message saying, "I'm away for two weeks in Brazil. Due to the surgery, when I return, please address me by my new name: Crystal." FML
by Monsieur-Madame / 05/31/2012 at 4:19pm / France (Champagne-Ardenne) / Love
by cero_kewl / 03/05/2012 at 12:12am / United States / Work
by wetdreams / 02/04/2012 at 7:35pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
by bunnyluver4545 / 01/11/2012 at 12:42am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
Today, I was naked, still deciding what to wear, when the doorbell rang. I grabbed the closest thing to cover up with: my Snuggie. I answered the door, it was kids asking for donations. Without thinking, I turned around to grab my purse. FML
by anonymous / 11/15/2011 at 10:17pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Miscellaneous
by cupcake_butt / 10/17/2011 at 4:39am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Kate / 10/16/2011 at 10:50pm / United States / Work
by pottie69 / 09/07/2011 at 1:23am / United States (Illinois) / Health
Today, I went shopping with my new "It's true, I'm a Ninja" shirt on. Suddenly an apple comes and hits me right in the eye. A little boy runs up to me, yells "You aren't a Ninja! A Ninja would have caught that!", and runs off. FML
by Anonymous / 11/07/2010 at 8:13pm / United States (Texas) / Kids
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, it's been two years since I graduated with my master's. It's also been the same amount of…
- Today, on the road in China, I committed a small offense. A cop saw me, stopped me and told me that… Today, I’m a trainee who recently arrived in a prestigious company. My boss walked in on me sorting… Today, I came back from the hospital after back surgery which required putting screws in my spine.…