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eyesak

Offline (the 02/24/2015 at 3:31pm) | Search for a member

eyesak

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1280
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About eyesak : With blood and rage of crimson red.
Ripped from a corpse so freshly dead.
Together with our hellish hate.
We'll burn you all--that is your fate.

eyesak's page activity

Visits<b>pureportedpear</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 6:07am<b>darwinism</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 4:42am<b>rybaby23</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 7:18pm<b>Goodtobebad</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 5:04pm<b>kirstenmartin</b> - the 05/10/2014 at 11:49am<b>crue88</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 1:14am<b>ChenEighty</b> - the 03/26/2014 at 9:12am<b>Welshite</b> - the 10/27/2013 at 10:01am<b>cnparks1990</b> - the 10/26/2013 at 8:15pm<b>Mr_Quinten</b> - the 08/07/2013 at 12:29am<b>fuckyourlifeOP</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 4:34am<b>Zoeythedinosaur</b> - the 06/23/2013 at 2:26pm<b>AMorassOfPixelz</b> - the 06/11/2013 at 12:33pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 05/31/2013 at 7:43pm

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eyesak's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up with my penis taped inside a milk bottle. Yes, I'm as baffled as you are. FML

#21350665
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29170) - you deserved it (4810)

On 02/05/2015 at 11:14pm - misc - by Milked Richard (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was complimented on my freckles. I don't actually have freckles, just a load of blackheads that won't go away. FML

#21322767
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27946) - you deserved it (3172)

On 12/23/2014 at 3:41pm - health - by eamiller (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, after a huge fight, my girlfriend started coming onto me. I thought it was actual make-up sex and went along with it. It was great, until she suddenly shoved me off her just as I was almost ready to come. She smugly announced she was dumping me, got dressed, then left. FML

#21308219
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36487) - you deserved it (5876)

On 11/29/2014 at 4:08pm - intimacy - by blueballed (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, I video-chatted with my mom and showed her my new, very short haircut. My dad walked in, took one look at me and said, "I can only attribute this to penis envy," and walked out again. FML

#21259205
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28740) - you deserved it (4137)

On 09/16/2014 at 12:31am - kids - by HeIsKindaRightTho (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, my dad stopped me mid-sentence and said he wanted to punch me in the face and set me on fire for using the word "selfie". FML

#21243189
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22884) - you deserved it (39538)

On 08/22/2014 at 2:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML

#21240323
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43141) - you deserved it (9404) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/18/2014 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Degueusement (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boss threw out the report I wrote for the board of directors. He said that if it were legal, he'd smash me in the balls with a brick for using Comic Sans. I had to do the whole thing again in another font with my coworkers snickering at me. FML

#21238351
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20981) - you deserved it (51097)

On 08/15/2014 at 5:35pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I heard my sister gagging in her room. She was doing it quietly, and I got pretty concerned, after hearing a lot about bulimia recently. I knocked, then heard a gasp, so I let myself in, only to see her on her knees and her boyfriend with his underwear around his ankles. FML

#21233355
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51840) - you deserved it (21178)

On 08/09/2014 at 3:29pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I let my coworker use my PC during lunch, because his was having problems. A few hours later, my boss called me into his office and gave me hell for apparently looking at furry porn during lunch break. He won't believe my explanation. For fuck's sake, Dave. FML

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

Today, I put on some sexy lingerie, ready to have some fun with my husband. I found him in the living room, opening a bag of doritos in front of the TV. He saw me and understood. Then he looked back at the doritos, then back at me and said gravely, "No way, babe. No way." FML

#21190698
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51923) - you deserved it (6648)

On 06/27/2014 at 7:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I got hit by a car while walking into the hospital to visit my wife, who had also gotten hit by a car. FML

#21182903
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57052) - you deserved it (4384)

On 06/21/2014 at 8:50am - health - by anon - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out I have genital herpes. I'm a virgin. FML

#21181955
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54832) - you deserved it (5367)

On 06/20/2014 at 2:20pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be witty to buy a miniature stop sign, and hold it up when she gets bored during sex. FML

#21180516
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50564) - you deserved it (14253)

On 06/19/2014 at 10:37am - love - by stopinthenameoflove - Ireland (Dublin)



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