About expertsmilee : Gamer at heart, more feelings than most guys, make love not war.
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expertsmilee's favorite FMLs
by w0w / 04/22/2016 at 8:12am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, after breaking up with my boyfriend of 2 years, I was backing out of his driveway when he came running out yelling "STOP!" I thought he wanted to make up so I kept going, until I'd run over his dog. FML
by itsnotyouitsme / 04/20/2016 at 2:54pm / United States (California) / Animals
by anonymous / 04/19/2016 at 11:09pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
Today, my son is having housing issues, so I let him stay at my place for a while. Today, he found out that the quiet, dorky-looking professor who lives next door is an MMA fighter. He tried to break into the guy's house in the middle of the night and is now in the hospital. FML
by Jim / 04/19/2016 at 1:25pm / United States / Kids
by Anonymous / 04/17/2016 at 1:27pm / Austria (Wien) / Miscellaneous
Today, I lay in bed reflecting on my fiancé's complaint about my lack of displays of affection. I felt terrible, so I rolled over and hugged him in his sleep. He's a fully trained martial artist and his immediate reaction was to try to snap my neck. FML
by bruised / 04/11/2016 at 3:26am / United States (Michigan) / Love
by Belle / 04/08/2016 at 2:11pm / United States (Illinois) / Health
by mackamuir / 04/01/2016 at 9:01am / Australia (Queensland) / Money
Today, my girlfriend accused me of cheating after she read some of my messages I sent to an old female friend. Apparently I'm very flirty with her. I showed her the same kind of messages that I sent to my guy friends as well. Now I'm apparently gay and cheating. FML
by Anonymous / 03/27/2016 at 12:46am / South Africa (Western Cape) / Love
Today, some of my coworkers have complained that I don't do my share of the work, though they can't specify exactly what I'm not getting done. Apparently, being too efficient and finishing first means I mustn't have done anything at all. The supervisor sided with them. FML
by 2fast4U / 03/21/2016 at 6:00am / Canada (British Columbia) / Work
by drucle / 03/18/2016 at 8:49am / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Health
Today, I joined my boyfriend at a work conference out of state. One of the other conference-goers struck up a conversation and I obliged. Apparently, I was too nice. He followed me into the hotel lobby and openly watched me go back to my hotel room, making sure to count the room numbers. FML
by CreeptacularBait / 03/16/2016 at 5:33pm / United States (Virginia) / Love
by GrandTheftArson / 03/08/2016 at 10:51pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
Today, while at a big speech and debate tournament, I corrected the judge's use of the word "podium" instead of lectern, because that's what my debate coach had told me was the correct usage. Well, she didn't take it too well and neither did my partner. Or my debate coach. FML
by Judgeisalwaysright / 03/01/2016 at 3:57am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/24/2016 at 12:58pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous