evan_7899

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Offline (the 01/13/2014 at 3:07am)

evan_7899

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 18 April 1979 (37 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5550
  • Number of comments : 197
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 29 posted

About evan_7899 : I Im from Toronto Canada and Italian Background

evan_7899's page activity

Visits<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 9:00am<b>doyouwantmedead</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 12:46pm<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 1:42pm<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 2:14am<b>aeisha26</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 8:49pm<b>slingerslasher</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 4:28pm<b>Envy22</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 10:25pm<b>xTommytheGUNx</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 4:28pm<b>Strangequeen22</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 2:16am<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 09/18/2015 at 4:53am<b>TheBestAround23</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 10:11pm<b>Haon329</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 1:32am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/29/2015 at 12:31pm<b>Wondermage</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 9:08pm<b>tampabayfan</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 10:54pm<b>shay_serendipity</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 8:35pm<b>EmoKami</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 4:08pm<b>Ka5hif</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 11:53am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 8:20pm

evan_7899's FML badges

Tweet, tweet

You have shared 20 FMLs on Twitter, your followers love you and we can understand why.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I like things a lot, 20 times in fact

You have liked 20 FMLs and your Facebook friends are going to like the FMLs that you have liked. We like that.

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evan_7899's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned I was conceived to the sounds of a Spice Girls album. FML

by queenxalee / 11/11/2013 at 6:58pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was mentioning to a coworker how there was a huge lull today in business. A young coworker then turns to me and says in a snooty tone, "I think you mean a 'lol', it's pronounced L-O-L." FML

by shut up. / 11/11/2013 at 5:36am / New Zealand / Work

Today, my family got together for a big game of paintball. My grandpa wanted to play too, but I told him he was a bit too old for such a rough sport. He joined anyway, and spent the whole 2 hours hunting my dumb ass down. I'm now in constant pain after being riddled with paintballs. FML

by nl4 / 11/01/2013 at 7:55pm / Israel (Tel Aviv) / Health

Today, I got a new cell phone number and sent a text to my wife. Playing around, I said, "Hey sexy are you alone yet? I'm ready to come over." She responded with, "Hey, yeah he is at work - did you get a new number?" FML

by PapaW / 11/01/2013 at 3:01am / United States (Utah) / Intimacy

Today, my husband and I were watching Jurassic Park. At the end of the movie, he commented on how amazed he was that they could "train those dinosaurs" to do exactly what they wanted them to do. FML

by Anonymous / 10/29/2013 at 1:01pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, I had to listen to my boss say "Arabica beans" in a goofy, fake New England accent every time the McDonald's ice coffee commercial came on the radio. I worked a 12-hour shift. FML

by Anonymous / 10/28/2013 at 8:53pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Work

Today, I was assigned to fill in for a French teacher who was out sick. I had asked the class to name some French-speaking countries. I called on one girl and she replied, "Uh, Europe. That's, like, the only other one, right?" Nobody disagreed. I'm filling in for the rest of the month. FML

by :| / 10/21/2013 at 9:40pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years drunkenly proposed to me, while sitting on the crapper, with the door open. FML

by ShittyProposal / 10/20/2013 at 3:06am / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, my job application got denied once again. I looked over it, and saw that my roommate added "screwing over customers" and "hiding dead bodies" under my skills. FML

by Anonymous / 10/20/2013 at 2:21am / United States (California) / Work

Today, after recently complaining that the reality show "The Great Norway Adventure" portrays us as a country of nationalistic rednecks, I saw my drunk dad chasing my uncle on a tractor while bellowing the national anthem at the top of his lungs. FML

by overly nationalistic redneck / 10/19/2013 at 3:37pm / Norway (Hordaland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my weird neighbor is a conspiracy theorist and thinks the government is trying to kill him. Someone thought it would be funny to shine a red laser light through his window. I was on the stairs when he ran past, screaming bloody murder, sending me down a flight of steps. FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2013 at 3:13am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband yelled from upstairs, "Babe! BABE, COME QUICK!" Terrified that something might have happened to our newborn daughter, I rushed up, only to find out he just wanted to show me that he'd learned how to spin a top on the tip of his penis without it falling. FML

by -____- / 10/05/2013 at 5:28pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I was reminded that while I have a nice waist, bum and boobs, I'm unspeakably ugly. I was walking down the street when a guy wolf-whistled from behind me, and when I turned around, he visibly recoiled in disgust. FML

by british_babe / 10/05/2013 at 1:51pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, my gran came over for dinner, for which I had to go grab some supplies from the supermarket. I guess I should have locked my laptop, because when I came back, I found my gran had used my Facebook account to propose to my now-ecstatic girlfriend. FML

by my gran is a cuntwaffle / 09/26/2013 at 4:36pm / United Kingdom / Love

Today, the Internet wasn't working. One girl decided to try to diagnose the problem. It said to connect the Ethernet cable. She started making fun of the computer for spelling "Internet" wrong. I'm graduating with this idiot in less than a month. FML

by Anonymous / 09/18/2013 at 10:57am / United States / Work