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englishmuffin

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englishmuffin

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 35991
  • Number of comments : 237
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About englishmuffin : I don't know why I chose the name Englishmuffin because it might give the impression that I'm English. Sadly, I am not.

englishmuffin's page activity

Visits<b>vana1697</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 5:10pm<b>tzemmy</b> - the 01/01/2015 at 6:37pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 7:51pm<b>GoodGuyForSure</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 11:09am<b>WingedLovely27</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 10:04pm<b>Pwib</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 5:15am<b>Arni792</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 8:56am<b>Fyrepower</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 12:13am<b>LittleJess23</b> - the 10/22/2013 at 7:12am<b>tjbrooks96</b> - the 01/12/2013 at 1:10am<b>Quest_</b> - the 10/23/2011 at 10:32pm<b>blackmanfh</b> - the 06/23/2011 at 2:19pm<b></b> - the 01/24/2011 at 4:08pm<b>TigerTattoo</b> - the 08/09/2010 at 8:07am<b>ilmbff</b> - the 07/01/2010 at 12:54am<b>nuclear</b> - the 10/04/2009 at 2:42am<b>ch2358</b> - the 09/30/2009 at 4:38pm<b>kayla_f_babyyy</b> - the 08/31/2009 at 11:04am

englishmuffin's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

englishmuffin's favorite FMLs

Today..!! mah parent are freaking at me because I just got mah report and I faild mah frst year of college!! They told me they have never been more looool disappointd in me!! I have to tell them that I'm also pregnant!! mega FML

#3800582
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21791) - you deserved it (93803)

On 07/16/2009 at 12:25pm - misc - by failure - Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador)

Today, while I was working as a waitress, I had to wait on a table of 13 people. I was struggling through it an when they finally left I went by the table to pick up mah tip. Instead of a money I got a napkin saying "Here's your tip, don't be a waitress." FML

#3729416
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55045) - you deserved it (6421)

On 07/13/2009 at 10:04pm - work - by Nick (woman) - United States (Arizona)

TODAY, MY COUSIN TOLD ME THAT THE STOP SIGNS OUTLINED WITH A WHITE LINE WERE OPTIONAL. LATER, A COP PULLED ME OVER, WHEN I ASKED WHY HE SAID, "YOU RAN THAT STOP SIGN BACK THERE." I EXPLAINED WHAT MY COUSIN HAD TOLD ME AN HE LOOKED AT ME FUNNY AN REPLIED, "ALL STOP SIGNS HAVE A WHITE OUTLINE." MEGA FML

#3593613
260 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12037) - you deserved it (101019)

On 07/08/2009 at 9:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, the car in front of me was going slow and I flashd my lights and honkd. I floord it and passd the car, flipping off the driver. Just as I went around the next corner I got pulld over by a motorcycle cop. A few seconds later, the guy I flippd off drove by honkd and wavd. FML

#3583602
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7839) - you deserved it (91968)

On 07/08/2009 at 2:45pm - misc - by AmberKCole (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today , I was driving with a friendhen we saw a wallet in the middle of his neighborhood road. When we picked it up , we saw it was loaded with cash. We drove to the mans house to return the wallet , andhen we handed it to him he told us "I would give u a reward but I don't have any cash." FML

#3465989
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44043) - you deserved it (5208)

On 07/03/2009 at 10:19pm - misc - by Hayls5 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today... I Watcd My Best Friend Get Marrid To Te Guy I Ave Been In Love Wit Since Te 8t Grade. I Was Te Maid Of Onor... And Ad To Give A Toast To Te Couple. FML

#3465145
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65623) - you deserved it (16062)

On 07/03/2009 at 9:45pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today , mah boyfriend calld me explaining that he is getting marrid this weekend to a woman he met on Craigslist. Why? Because I won't marry him , and he'll make an extra thousand dollars per month having a wife since he is in the army. FML

#3462029
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41757) - you deserved it (11046)

On 07/03/2009 at 7:25pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I finally crackd the password on my husband's email account. I don't know which is worse: finding out your husband is cheating on you with several people, or finding his password include his ex-grlfriend's name. FML

#3305940
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58791) - you deserved it (22810)

On 06/28/2009 at 1:42pm - love - by resipsahipsta (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex . Over breakfast, she said it was the most intense, primal and mind-blowing sexual experience she ever had . Problem is, I don't remember a damned thing . FML

#2602287
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66069) - you deserved it (9320)

On 06/04/2009 at 4:10pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

today I got pulld over for speeding!! I startd fixing mah hair and unbuttoning a couple of buttons on mah shirt, hoping the policeman would let me off with a warning!! When he got to the car, he rolld his eyes and mutterd something under his breath!! I saw him walk back to the cop car gagging!! FML

#1316192
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11670) - you deserved it (78980)

On 04/25/2009 at 9:51am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)



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