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Offline (the 09/28/2015 at 4:24am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 5 July 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 948
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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elizabethkalyn's page activity

Visits<b>crushcrusher</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 10:27am<b>Roxas_hearts</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 10:32pm<b>sanghera43</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 3:31pm<b>rhiley</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 5:54am<b>butterflies997</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 2:47am<b>Misskreher</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 9:31am<b>PrincessKenny</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 3:57pm<b>Capriciousfox</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 10:16pm<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 12:02am<b>boricualuv</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 8:23pm<b>Googolman</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 1:41pm<b>xninix</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 1:33am<b>TanJew</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 4:12pm<b>madi113</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 1:07am<b>Mc2013</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 11:36am<b>buonotomato</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 9:27am<b>buckydargon</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 1:28pm<b>awesome64760</b> - the 07/02/2014 at 1:35am

Fucked!<b>Roxas_hearts</b> - the 08/02/2016 at 4:32am<b>Misskreher</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 3:31pm

elizabethkalyn's FML badges


You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of elizabethkalyn's badges

elizabethkalyn's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my husband has been talking to another woman on Facebook. His only defense was "I thought I deleted the messages." FML

by gmac0417 / 09/01/2012 at 2:02am / United States / Love

Today, I found out that if a guy you've been dating starts acting weird, there's probably a reason why. Like, perhaps, a wife and two kids. FML

by yonanon / 08/31/2012 at 8:02am / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, I met a girl I used to make fun of in high school. She was taking my fingerprints after I was arrested. FML

by TheBeautifulOne / 08/23/2012 at 9:42am / United Kingdom (South Ayrshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom and I somehow got into a serious argument over the ethics of capturing and training Pokémon. FML

by Anonymous / 07/08/2012 at 5:03pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML

by kalikanna / 07/07/2012 at 2:10am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend got a tattoo of a Rainbow Dash over her pubic mound. Now whenever I go down on her, I'll be eye-to-eye with an adorable pony that shits rainbows. FML

by nobrony / 07/02/2012 at 3:53pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed making out. He then tried to unhook my bra. After a full minute of trying unsuccessfully, he shouted "Fuck you, bra!" before hiding his face in the pillows. FML

by Anonymous / 07/01/2012 at 7:08pm / Intimacy

Today, I saw a large spider carry away the body of a dead spider in the bathroom. In my anthropology class, we learned one of the first signs of civilization is caring for the dead. First, they become civilized, and next, they take over. I will never sleep again. FML

by BloodFaerie / 06/30/2012 at 2:49am / United States (Georgia) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was reading erotic literature and noticed several errors in syntax, resulting in my mood being killed. I was cockblocked by my need for grammatical correctness. FML

by Anonymous / 06/17/2012 at 12:53am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML

by Anonymous / 05/18/2012 at 10:35pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend and I agreed to tell her parents that she's pregnant. When they started freaking out, instead of dealing with the situation maturely, she went into straight-up Tard Mode and said, "It's okay, I'm not the mom." FML

by yamsterr / 03/12/2012 at 12:27pm / United States / Love

Today, I was walking home when an old guy came up to me asking for directions. After I pointed him in the right direction, he held my hand, stroked my face then pushed me into a bush. FML

by SpongeAbii2 / 01/24/2012 at 6:47am / United Kingdom (Milton Keynes) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried exercising. My whole house shook. FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2012 at 10:47pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, I discovered my wife and I have referred to our two-year-old as 'cutie' or 'beautiful' so many times she won't respond to her own name. FML

by BadFather / 11/21/2011 at 1:23am / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend went and bought Skyrim, Modern Warfare 3 and renewed his WoW subscription. Looks like I won't be getting laid for a month or two. FML

by anonymous / 11/17/2011 at 3:22pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy