elibel

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Offline (the 09/21/2016 at 12:12am)

elibel

3Fucked!

elibelelibel
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3382
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About elibel : Freshman in college

elibel's page activity

Visits<b>iwillreapyou</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 6:02pm<b>Endrex</b> - the 01/28/2016 at 9:53am<b>merikilee</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 6:22am<b>aishah77</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 8:52am<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 4:01pm<b>hayleyblack2u71</b> - the 02/12/2015 at 5:47pm<b>vrossie_</b> - the 02/01/2015 at 11:56pm<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 01/04/2015 at 1:04pm<b>HowieDoIt</b> - the 12/06/2014 at 4:19am<b>imarlee98</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 8:39pm<b>WillowB47</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 6:13pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 5:09pm<b>candyolympics</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 8:41pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 7:28pm<b>Roaryah</b> - the 10/22/2014 at 4:13pm<b>CraftedByHand</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 3:08am<b>maxyutd</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 8:15am<b>jb590</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 8:15am

Fucked!<b>imarlee98</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 2:39am<b>emmaaadotcom</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 4:41am

elibel's FML badges

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You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of elibel's badges

elibel's favorite FMLs

Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML

by fucked by sex ed / 03/29/2013 at 1:18pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got stuck in traffic when a shootout started somewhere behind. I lowered myself and suddenly a bullet punctured a hole in the rear screen. When I managed to get away, I called my wife in a panic. She didn't pick up so I sent her a text about what just happened. Her reply: "K". FML

by n3ov / 02/25/2013 at 11:33pm / Pakistan (Islamabad) / Intimacy

Today, I felt like letting my ex know just how I felt about all the bullshit he put me through. I dug up his number, typed a long paragraph with lots of pain and emotion, and sent it. The reply: "No wonder he broke up with you." Thanks, whoever has that number now. FML

by Anonymous / 02/18/2013 at 4:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking at engagement rings. When the store owner asked about our budget, my boyfriend said with a straight face, "Nothing too expensive, I have a big penis so I don't have to overcompensate by buying a big diamond." FML

by NewlyDread / 02/05/2013 at 9:31pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, while buying paint, I began to help an elderly woman working to lift some heavy boxes. She told me what a nice young lady I was. Then her boss came over, screamed at her for being lazy and fired her. She cried. So did I. FML

by Anonymous / 12/31/2012 at 10:44am / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Miscellaneous

Today, after an extensive talk with a relationship counselor, we concluded that I'm more likely to get run over by a car than be in a stable relationship. FML

by Hit-and-Run / 12/13/2012 at 3:01am / Mexico (Chihuahua) / Love

Today, my mom sold my Magic box at a garage sale because I "never use it." Locked inside it was my fake ID, a couple of hundred bucks, and a bag of weed. She can't remember who she sold it to. FML

by karmaquestionmark / 11/19/2012 at 9:04pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, it was my 2 year anniversary with my boyfriend. As we were about to exchange gifts, he got a call and said he had to go home immediately. What was the emergency? His guild leader couldn't find another healer to finish a raid and promised my boyfriend gear if he would step up. FML

by Marie / 10/17/2012 at 1:16am / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I saw a shady looking person on the street. As I walked past him, he said, "Hey, come here." Thinking he needed something, I went over. He handed me several pictures of my wife, in public and at home. I've never seen this man before in my life. FML

by ahappypenguin / 09/26/2012 at 12:07am / Miscellaneous

Today, at school, a guy walked up to me and said I look a little too young to be at high school. I told him that I'm sixteen years old. He stared at my chest for several long seconds, muttered "What the fuck?" and walked off. FML

by wtf yourself, cunt / 09/17/2012 at 7:14pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was fired for using violence and intimidation in the work place. I was a bouncer at a strip club. FML

by John / 06/30/2012 at 1:08am / United States (New York) / Work

Today, my husband thought it would be "funny" to put laxatives in the cakes for my son's 7th birthday party. Over 40 kids came to the party. FML

by Anonymous / 01/25/2012 at 11:18pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, the quality of my sex life reached a new low. I faked my orgasm. And so did he. FML

by sosadbuttrue / 01/14/2012 at 8:15am / Switzerland (Glarus) / Intimacy

Today, as I was running from the cops I jumped behind a bush to hide. Turns out it was a massive thorn bush. I later had the most painful shower I have ever experienced. FML

by Jess / 12/04/2011 at 10:22pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was struggling to cycle up a steep hill. A guy heading past me on a scooter said I'd lost something. I stopped and looked back. Seeing nothing, I asked him what I lost. He replied, "Your momentum!" FML

by adieuvelib / 10/14/2011 at 9:53pm / France / Miscellaneous