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elfcat

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elfcat

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 1342
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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elfcat's page activity

Visits<b>SmittyJA24</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 10:06pm

elfcat's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of elfcat's badges

elfcat's favorite FMLs

Today, I accidentally sat on my sister's imaginary monkey. She then stabbed me with a pencil. I still can't get the piece of graphite out of my hand. FML

#21430170
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24093) - you deserved it (2078)

On 06/22/2015 at 3:10pm - kids - by vkryss13 - Guam

Today, at a mind-numbingly boring support session, everyone was talking about their hardships. One guy was talking about losing his leg in a car accident. I was half-asleep and asked without thinking, "Did you ever find it?" I almost shat my pants at the roomful of death glares that followed. FML

#21389976
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17324) - you deserved it (32368)

On 04/08/2015 at 12:08pm - misc - by S to the HIT (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my girlfriend keeps my toenails in her deceased grandmother's prized music box. She says it's to, "Keep the box natural." I don't understand why she does this, or what she means by "natural." FML

#21383678
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24256) - you deserved it (2054)

On 03/29/2015 at 5:18pm - misc - by coldasfire - United States

Today, I went to the doctor, because I've been having stomach pains and nausea for weeks. He ended up gravely telling me I'm pregnant. I freaked out and panicked about what my parents would say. Then his laughter reminded me that I'm a guy. A really stupid one. FML

#21367918
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70) - you deserved it (162)

On 03/04/2015 at 10:03am - health - by actually just constipated.. and stupid - Tunisia

Today, I got drunk at a party. I didn't want my parents to know, so I took out my phone, called my parents, and asked them not to tell them I'm drunk. FML

#21354315
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18803) - you deserved it (35673)

On 02/11/2015 at 7:40pm - misc - by SDCore (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while correcting essays, I spilled ketchup on a student's paper. I managed to successfully turn it into a happy smiley face but when proudly looking at the result, noticed it was right next to the big "F" that I had graded it. FML

#21352870
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23805) - you deserved it (9187)

On 02/09/2015 at 5:58pm - work - by tirf -

Today, my boss informed me I couldn't go on my "vacation" because he's leaving for one of his employees' weddings. That just so happens to be my wedding, for which I'm taking the vacation. FML

Today, I got attacked by a monkey. My country isn't even supposed to have monkeys in it. FML

#21346049
96 comments

Today, after I got home from a long day at work. I go inside my room and find a life-size cut out of Miley Cyrus. I don't know how it got here. I'm the only person with a key to my apartment. FML

#21345231
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28884) - you deserved it (1989)

On 01/27/2015 at 6:46pm - misc - by I'm screwed - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I mixed up my chapstick and cork grease. Now my clarinet smells like cherries, and my lips smell like a gym floor. FML

#21340194
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28941) - you deserved it (6339)

On 01/19/2015 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was accused of letting my dog take a shit on the sidewalk and not picking it up. My dog's a chihuahua, and the turd was almost longer than he is. I got fined anyway. FML

#21339093
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28568) - you deserved it (5223) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2015 at 4:12pm - animals - by Titatoum - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)

Today, I was brushing my teeth. When it came time for me to spit, I absentmindedly opened the bathroom drawer and spat in there instead of in the sink. FML

#21328982
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24686) - you deserved it (11261)

On 01/01/2015 at 10:38pm - misc - by 30000 - United States (California)

Today, a customer came in with a laptop smashed beyond repair. She asked if we could recover her files, but thanks to my idiot boss' new store policy I had to ask her a bunch of questions, including if she had tried "turning it on and off". She stared at me, speechless, like I was a complete moron. FML

#21321539
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36035) - you deserved it (4108)

On 12/21/2014 at 2:08pm - work - by anonix (man) - Canada

Today, I was informed that my uneven facial features make me seem "untrustworthy." Glad to know my unchangeable physical appearance doubles as a character flaw. FML

#21317152
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29703) - you deserved it (2233)

On 12/14/2014 at 2:56am - misc - by lopsided (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, at work, due to a mix up, I had to call an answering service. I am also from an answering service. We got the problem fixed but I couldn't hang up due to company policy. She couldn't hang up either. We both had to get our supervisors for permission to hang up. FML

#21312305
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33885) - you deserved it (3302)

On 12/06/2014 at 12:18am - work - by ring-a-ding-ding (woman) - United States (Nevada)



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