efettes

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Offline (the 09/21/2014 at 10:16pm)

efettes

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Thursday 19 January 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 8197
  • Number of comments : 58
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About efettes : Umm well I really don't know what to say... I've been a fan of the site forever and finally got an account :) message me and I will get back to you as soon as I see it :) (which may or may not be a couple days or even a week or two...)

efettes's page activity

Visits<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 6:22am<b>couchcat</b> - the 05/27/2016 at 7:11pm<b>Niz_DD</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 12:55pm<b>M3DO</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 7:13pm<b>pjpeej13</b> - the 12/05/2015 at 4:04pm<b>YodaMyNameIs</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 12:16pm<b>Keaves41</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 10:30pm<b>sweetgirl89</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 12:36pm<b>Feklfekl2222</b> - the 06/26/2015 at 6:48pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 4:59pm<b>saturday00</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 4:36pm<b>Shalinar</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 2:22pm<b>why_teh_hell</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 12:29am<b>xninix</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 6:46pm<b>devi_916</b> - the 01/24/2015 at 5:21pm<b>cheese7272</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 4:32am<b>tsent8</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 2:27pm<b>chrisseesyou</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 10:35pm

efettes's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

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You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Perfectionist

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efettes's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw my friend's car in front of school. I'd had a bad day and just wanted to talk with her. I got in and sat down, and felt something squish beneath me. Turns out it wasn't actually my friend's car, and I'd just sat on a random woman's cake. FML

by Sherressa / 12/02/2013 at 3:04pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I pulled over a speeding driver. I admit that I'd been hoping for this moment since I joined the police force; the moment a lady put her cleavage on display to get out of a ticket. Sadly, this lady was a senior citizen, and her breasts looked like two semi-deflated balloons. FML

by fuck my eyeballs / 12/01/2013 at 6:07pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I got accused of trying to steal clothes because I was taking so long in the fitting rooms with only a couple of items. I got stuck in one of the shirts I was trying on. FML

by MissDQ / 11/30/2013 at 4:07am / Australia (Western Australia) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It was also the first time he'd ever had sex. How could I tell? He cried all the way through, and called his parents right after. FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2013 at 6:56am / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy

Today, my mother posted a video of me giving birth, on Facebook. FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2013 at 3:23am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, my neighbor brought a ruined napkin holder over and claimed that we drilled a hole through his wall and ruined it. I apologized, not telling him that it was actually a bullet that my boyfriend shot through the wall. FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2013 at 12:53am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML

by MissYouPieceOfSkin / 11/27/2013 at 3:44am / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, I was taking some clean bedsheets down from the top of the wardrobe. As I pulled the top sheet down, a cat jumped onto my face, claws and all, before falling to the floor and running away. Thing is, I don't own a cat and I have no idea where in the house it has hidden now. FML

by Seriously_Scaredy_Cat / 11/27/2013 at 2:08am / United States / Animals

Today, my mom told me that when my sister and I were born, the first thing my dad said was, "I hope they don't turn out vegetarian." I did. FML

by fack / 11/26/2013 at 1:35pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my boyfriend has a fetish for cats. I think I'm going to have to meow before we do anything together. FML

by HaedLei / 11/26/2013 at 7:17am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my workplace had a big employee photoshoot for an ad campaign. I was there all of 30 seconds before the photographer said, "What the fuck? Look guys, this ain't an ad for facial abortions." He then asked me and another colleague to step out of the shot. FML

by fuggers :/ / 11/24/2013 at 4:38pm / United Kingdom (Hampshire) / Work

Today, my workplace had a big employee photoshoot for an ad campaign. I was there all of 30 seconds before the photographer said, "What the fuck? Look guys, this ain't an ad for facial abortions." He then asked me and another colleague to step out of the shot. FML

by fuggers :/ / 11/24/2013 at 4:38pm / United Kingdom (Hampshire) / Work

Today, I realized that no matter what I accomplish in life, I'll always be remembered for being the son of a woman so stupid that she claimed she used to be Elvis Presley's mistress. She was still an infant when he died. FML

by fs / 11/23/2013 at 6:45pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, after getting a root canal, I told my mother how boring it was just sitting there with my mouth open for ages while the dentist did his work. She then told me how she had to do the same kind of thing on her anniversary night with my father. FML

by Anonymous / 11/23/2013 at 4:57pm / Argentina / Health

Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML

by I hate that game / 11/23/2013 at 11:11am / United Kingdom (Wigan) / Miscellaneous