About dsw144 : hi! I'm Natalie and... well ya
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dsw144's favorite FMLs
Today, my daughter was putting clothes in the drier when she yelled, "Mom!! The drier won't start!" I had to explain to her that the door needed to be shut. Her response, "Oh. I didn't know that mattered." She's 15. FML
by i_am_forever / 01/05/2015 at 8:59pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I helped a very large elderly man, who thanked me and tried to hand me a dollar bill. I kindly told him, "We are not allowed to accept tips from customers." His reply was, "You're going to take this fucking money," and shoved it in my pocket. I'm now being written up for it. FML
by justinmdent / 11/23/2014 at 10:48pm / United States (Missouri) / Work
by Anonymous / 11/23/2014 at 12:46pm / United States / Kids
Today, in the middle of a boring class, my friend offered me some Smarties. We're not allowed to eat in class, but I had a couple anyway. As I put them in my mouth, my "friend" stood up and yelled that I was doing ecstasy. I might actually get expelled. FML
by drugsforthugs / 11/18/2014 at 12:26pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by elsatheannoyed / 11/11/2014 at 11:34pm / United States (California) / Work
by LittleRed79 / 11/11/2014 at 3:03am / Canada / Animals
Today, I was at my friend's Bar Mitzvah. After he finished his long-winded speech, I sarcastically did the mockingjay sign from the Hunger Games. It took a couple of seconds before I realized how that looked, and a couple more for me to be shouted down and kicked out. FML
by Anonymous / 11/08/2014 at 12:24pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was getting everything ready for mine and my husband's first wedding anniversary. Flowers, check. Crisp new bed sheets, check. Silk underwear, check. Crippling cramps and an early period, check. FML
by betterthanhodor / 11/08/2014 at 9:09am / United Kingdom (Suffolk) / Intimacy
Today, I was in the middle of a shower, and downstairs I heard my 7 year old daughter screaming "Mom!! Help! I need you right now!" I panicked and ran downstairs, not giving myself enough time to put some clothing on. It was my neighbor at the door. FML
by ozozl / 11/06/2014 at 11:29pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids
by HelpMe1 / 11/06/2014 at 1:53am / Indonesia (Jakarta Raya) / Work
by Purple / 11/05/2014 at 8:12pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I learned that the house I've been living in and paying rent for the past two months was never advertised as vacant. I learned this when the actual homeowners walked in, and called the police for an "intruder." FML
by Anonymous / 11/03/2014 at 10:54am / United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset) / Money
by That Guy / 11/01/2014 at 8:58am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I got in an argument with my teacher for always comparing me to my sister that she had a few years before. After I said, "I'm not my sister so please stop comparing me to her," she responded, "Of course you're not your sister, I actually like your sister." FML
by Not so much of a teachers pet / 10/22/2014 at 4:55pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I took my printer to work because the one in my office is broken. When I tried to leave, my boss stopped me and accused me of stealing it from the office. Nobody would believe me when I explained. Now my boss has a new printer. FML
by Anonymous / 10/19/2014 at 12:11am / United States / Work