dreamering

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dreamering

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3552
  • Number of comments : 614
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About dreamering : I’ve been here forever, practically since the beginning, even though I registered later.
FML it’s the best pastime in the long commute to work.
I like irony and sarcasm and most of the time I’m not serious on what I write.

By the way, do you know about Sirinz.org?

dreamering's page activity

Visits<b>americanafrican</b> - the 08/28/2016 at 11:51pm<b>BanjoCheeseGuy</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 10:10am<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 06/09/2016 at 3:11pm<b>californian21</b> - the 05/07/2016 at 9:26am<b>lollipopfudge2</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 11:35pm<b>andrmac</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 5:07pm<b>Jkalia</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 3:14am<b>quazimozart</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 8:16am<b>thatJerseygirl</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 6:17pm<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 7:07pm<b>sabby7</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 1:49am<b>am1717</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 12:09pm<b>epicx22</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 1:33am<b>brennaunderwood</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 9:33am<b>britbear0731</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 10:17pm<b>jacksonpm23</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 10:34am<b>shupwhup</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 7:10pm<b>barisozdemir</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 7:38am

Fucked!<b>epicx22</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 7:33am<b>theBalloonPerson</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 12:07pm<b>Al97</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 3:55pm<b>badgemaster</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 12:31am

dreamering's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of dreamering's badges

dreamering's favorite FMLs

Today, I shat a magnet. FML

by mimi / 09/26/2011 at 10:51pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, I noticed that when I sweat I smell like bacon. I'm a vegetarian. FML

by sweatstreaks / 09/16/2011 at 5:38am / United Kingdom (Wiltshire) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my husband that I wanted him to stay sober during the week. He responded by saying he wanted me to be a supermodel during the week. FML

by brinn / 09/16/2011 at 1:15am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

by IbetIgotAIDS / 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, I got bored and decided to visit a porn site. I typed in the address and hit enter. A split second later, I realized I wasn't typing into the browser address bar, but in a chat window on my other screen. I'd been chatting with a girl I wanted to get with at the time. FML

by Extended_desktop / 09/11/2011 at 1:53pm / Poland / Intimacy

Today, the girl I've been dating, and starting to fall in love with, walked out of the bathroom claiming we were going to be parents. I jumped off of the couch in disbelief, yelling, "Really?" She replied, "Really. I just gave birth to a huge dump baby." FML

by CaseyFpC85 / 09/11/2011 at 11:13am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, the girl I've been dating, and starting to fall in love with, walked out of the bathroom claiming we were going to be parents. I jumped off of the couch in disbelief, yelling, "Really?" She replied, "Really. I just gave birth to a huge dump baby." FML

by CaseyFpC85 / 09/11/2011 at 11:13am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night feeling sick. I went to the bathroom and knelt in front of the toilet, waiting to throw up. When I finally did, I violently shit my pants at the same time. I was at my friend's house. FML

by sadddddd / 09/10/2011 at 9:54pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Health

Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML

by Anonymous / 09/10/2011 at 2:35am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was masturbating while chewing gum. Halfway into the session, the gum flew down my throat, causing me to violently choke. My mom had to rush in and help me while I still had my pants around my ankles. FML

by omfgnooo / 09/09/2011 at 7:22pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, a car backed into mine. I thought that was pretty bad, until another car backed into me right after I'd finished taking the first guy's info. FML

by Mark / 09/09/2011 at 12:51am / United States (Washington) / Transportation

Today, I needed to pay off a $35 parking ticket. To try and get some sort of revenge, I went to the bank and got 3,500 pennies, dumped them into a bucket, and refused to pay with anything besides the pennies. They called the police. I was arrested and cited $147. FML

by Not_you17 / 09/09/2011 at 12:04am / United States (Georgia) / Money

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I heard on a TV show that it's possible to fit a standard light-bulb in your mouth, but it can't be removed afterwards. I just had to try this out. And then visit the local hospital to get it removed. FML

by Stuck / 09/08/2011 at 6:00am / United States / Health

Today, behind a cabinet, I found a scratch-off lottery ticket I hadn't scratched yet. After scratching it off, I realized it's a $2,500 winner. The lottery commission won't accept it because they stopped using that game 2 years ago. FML

by BigMoney / 09/07/2011 at 1:25pm / United States (Ohio) / Money

Today, my husband compared me to his parent's dog. Why? Because when I sleep I fart and scare myself awake... Just like his parents dog. FML

by anonomys / 09/05/2011 at 3:19pm / Canada (Quebec) / Animals