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dpbk

Offline (the 10/07/2014 at 10:21pm) | Search for a member

dpbk

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 21 May 1998 (17 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 190
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About dpbk : why

dpbk's page activity

Visits<b>DarkSmoke591</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 11:47am<b>mfaizsiddiqui</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 3:43pm<b>morondon000</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 9:29pm<b>feeshcake</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 4:53pm<b>baseballx07</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 7:50pm

dpbk's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of dpbk's badges

dpbk's favorite FMLs

Today, I won a gruelling fitness competition, only to find out the mystery prize was a voucher to get 10 free spray tans. I'm black. FML

#21249089
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48426) - you deserved it (4005)

On 08/31/2014 at 2:44pm - misc - by disappointedjamaican - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43577) - you deserved it (27809)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my sister ran into my room unannounced while I was on webcam with a potential employer. Before I could react, she looked at my screen, said "Damn, he's fucking hot." and flashed him. FML

#21191852
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52298) - you deserved it (4748)

On 06/28/2014 at 8:26pm - work - by justno - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as I was standing in line at the checkout, the elderly guy in front turned around and said quietly to me, "Sometimes I shit my pants." He then nodded grimly and turned back around, hitting me with the full force of the stench now coming from his pants. FML

#21158187
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44411) - you deserved it (3816)

On 05/31/2014 at 12:39pm - health - by half-dead in CA (man) - United States (California)

Today, I baked a strawberry cake and I didn't have any fresh strawberries for garnish, so I used a can of strawberry pie filling. My neighbors said it looked like the cake was taken from the dumpster behind an abortion clinic. FML

#21146042
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41232) - you deserved it (8085)

On 05/20/2014 at 5:54am - misc - by sothishappened (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, at my job at a fast-food restaurant, I once again got called into the men's bathroom to break up sex between two homeless people. FML

#21145062
193 comments

Today, a customer cussed me out for hiding behind the counter a jacket she's been "eyeing since it came out". She loudly exclaimed that she was going to report me to my manager and get me "fired." It was my personal jacket that we don't even sell. FML

Today, my guide dog sneezed so hard that it slammed its head on the floor and knocked itself out. I have to trust this dog with my life. FML

#21117679
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53752) - you deserved it (4711)

On 04/20/2014 at 12:03am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today, I was playing monopoly with my boyfriend and a few friends. After I bankrupted my boyfriend, he turned to me and said, "I fucked your best friend last night, so who really won?" I turned to the best friend in question, she looked at the board and said, "I'd like to buy a house please." FML

#20967834
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62357) - you deserved it (4530)

On 11/23/2013 at 11:11am - misc - by I hate that game - United Kingdom (Wigan)

Today, while working at Chipotle, a teenage girl asked in all seriousness if she "could have a steak burrito, but with like, chicken instead?" FML

#20951236
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45152) - you deserved it (3727)

On 11/09/2013 at 9:15am - work - by fmylyfe (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my husband was getting undressed. I told my 2-year-old daughter not to go in our bedroom because he was undressing in there. I turned my back and she instantly ran off to my bedroom. I heard her shout "I can see daddy's tail!" Now, she points to everyone's crotch and shouts "TAIL!" FML

#20943580
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51969) - you deserved it (6655)

On 11/03/2013 at 9:22am - kids - by KittyKat (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, the Chinese student I've been teaching English to got on stage in front of hundreds of people to read her final essay. She ended with, "What a fucking day." I don't swear, and I no longer have a job. FML

#20571924
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35070) - you deserved it (2438)

On 04/02/2013 at 5:14pm - work - by effiestonem154 (woman) - United States

Today, after years of waiting, I finally got to meet the band whose music got me through one of the hardest times I have ever experienced. When I turned down the lead singer for sex, they told me to leave. FML

#19470804
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32777) - you deserved it (12510)

On 04/15/2012 at 3:03am - intimacy - by bummed - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, in high school, we had a presentation about sex, condoms, etc. After a while, the lady explained that we should get to know our sexual organs better. "For example, my daughter looks at her vagina in front of a mirror to check it out." I’m her daughter. FML

#14614725
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59529) - you deserved it (6139) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - Belgium - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, I was bet 100 dollars that I couldn't break a piece off a brick with my head. I couldn't, and I have 2 gashes in my head now. FML

#7467254
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4297) - you deserved it (64754)

On 01/21/2010 at 12:02am - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)



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