dinosaurfeet

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dinosaurfeet

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 834
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About dinosaurfeet : Hey guys! I come on here everyday to laugh at the things that happen to people (:
I don't reply often to messages :s So yeah js x
Anyway, I'm done so bye :)

dinosaurfeet's page activity

Visits<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 10:14pm<b>xyris</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 3:19pm<b>danielhartlesss</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 1:16am<b>k_gils</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 4:16pm<b>marcusaa</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 8:45pm<b>abhi95</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 2:25am<b>slizzy</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 12:28pm<b>glowbaby</b> - the 11/24/2013 at 1:14pm<b>nicolesykes</b> - the 05/18/2013 at 5:24pm<b>ydi_4_suking</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 5:59pm<b>ekb777</b> - the 04/25/2013 at 11:34am<b>clareobryan</b> - the 04/24/2013 at 9:33am<b>SirCharles83</b> - the 04/15/2013 at 8:02am<b>nukem4747</b> - the 04/14/2013 at 12:08am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 04/12/2013 at 4:53pm<b>olpally</b> - the 04/12/2013 at 9:16am<b>MWidderAUDI</b> - the 04/11/2013 at 5:36am<b>xxoriginalnamexx</b> - the 04/09/2013 at 10:01pm

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dinosaurfeet's favorite FMLs

Today, I was about to break up with my psycho girlfriend. As I sat her down, she told me she wanted to show me something. She then took off her shirt to reveal my name tattooed across her chest. FML

by guess I'm stuck / 04/16/2013 at 3:23am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was at the park unsuccessfully trying to take a selfie. A stranger walked up to me and offered to take the picture for me. I agreed and gave him my phone. He took it and ran off. FML

by no selfie for me / 04/16/2013 at 12:08am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's my 17th birthday, and the first birthday since my mother died, leaving me to live with my previously-absent father. He gave me pretzels and a laser pointer, and said, "Happy birthday, fuckstick". One more year. FML

by Anonymous / 04/09/2013 at 12:59am / Canada / Miscellaneous

Today, I turned 18. My parents got me a pineapple and a pair of socks. I'm allergic to pineapple, and the socks are too small. FML

by ShellShocked / 03/30/2013 at 12:06am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't share food after I tried taking a chip from him. I made popcorn that night, and when he tried to take some, I said, "I'm sorry, I don't share food" to get him back. His response? "I can tell." FML

by fuckyoutoo / 03/24/2013 at 7:47pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I realized I'd put on my shirt on inside out, so I went to the bathroom stalls to fix it. As I was taking it off, I accidentally dropped it in the toilet. FML

by Anonymous / 11/19/2012 at 4:08pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, our school chorus went to a senior citizens' home. An elderly lady died during my solo. FML

by sorrygrandma / 01/31/2012 at 10:34pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I put a blue toilet cleaner square in the back of toilet. My fiancé called me later on freaking out because he couldn't get the "blue water to go away" when he flushed. FML

by sparklethelette / 12/06/2011 at 8:38pm / United States (Connecticut) / Love

Today, I had to take my son to the emergency room for shooting himself in the ass with a BB gun. FML

by myfamilyisodd / 10/15/2011 at 1:05pm / United States (North Carolina) / Kids

Today, I overheard my husband talking to our 6 year-old about animals for a project. I listened, thinking it was cute, until my husband said gleefully, "Remember to say this in your project: octopuses have 8 testicles." FML

by daddoesn'tknowbest / 10/13/2011 at 8:24am / United States / Kids

Today, while I was waiting in line at McDonalds, I found out I can sneeze, pee, and poop all at the same time. FML

by Anonymous / 10/08/2011 at 12:00pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my phone alarm woke me up. It had fallen under my boyfriend's bed. Naked, I got on all fours to retrieve it. My boyfriend's dog stuck his nose in my ass. FML

by coldwetnose / 05/09/2011 at 2:08am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my daughter went potty. Just as she always does, she came up to me and announced, "I flushed, and wiped, and shut the light off." Then she did something brand new. She covered my face with her hand and asked, "Do these fingers smell?" They did. FML

by Username / 03/17/2011 at 12:04am / Kids

Today, I found my mom eating cat biscuits. We don't have a cat. FML

by Aled / 02/17/2011 at 11:33am / United Kingdom (Derby) / Animals

Today, in dance class, the instructor asked me to demonstrate the splits to the group. I slid down, my legs opening wider as I descended. I then loudly farted for the full 5 seconds it took to reach the ground. FML

by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 11:44am / Switzerland / Health