About dextrementor : I play guitar.
I Don't give a shit if I offend you.
I Don't give a shit what you think of me.
About dextrementor : I play guitar.
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dextrementor's favorite FMLs
Today, at my job of 2 months, I'd taken it upon myself to water the plants around the office every day since they all looked a little sad. My boss then asked why so many of the fake plants were getting mouldy. My co-workers had watched me water plastic plants for 2 months and nobody bothered to tell me. FML
by anonymous / 04/19/2016 at 11:09pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
Today, after handing over the cash to buy my sister's car off her, she refused to sign any of the paperwork, and later put an ad on Craigslist selling the same car. I got scammed by my own sister. FML
by Kassutera / 06/06/2015 at 7:15am / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
by TCRII / 07/23/2014 at 7:52pm / United States (Virginia) / Kids
by kittynapper / 07/17/2014 at 7:32pm / United States (Colorado) / Animals
by toonice / 07/17/2014 at 4:48pm / United States (Oregon) / Love
Today, we decided to go to an aquarium for a little family get-away. At the end was a shark viewing deck, and I leaned over the rails to get a better look. How did I find out that my glasses needed to be adjusted? They fell off and sunk right to the bottom of the shark-infested waters. FML
by Anonymous / 07/17/2014 at 11:57am / United States (Ohio) / Animals
Today, I had to drop off my library book. I thought I'd dropped in into the library book drop, but I'd accidentally put it in the post office mail box. To get the book back, I had to explain this incident five times to three librarians, a mailman, and my sister who called me ridiculous. FML
by lolateverything / 07/17/2014 at 12:25am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
by Is that..? / 07/16/2014 at 11:51pm / United States (Colorado) / Work
Today, I went to a market. I saw stall which had mainly animal furs and things like that. I found a rounded, furry pen and stroked my cheek with it. Wondering what it was, being so soft and oddly shaped, I checked the tag. It was kangaroo testicles. FML
by happypineapple / 07/16/2014 at 11:31pm / Australia (Queensland) / Animals
Today, I was waiting in a line, texting on my phone. I hear what sounded like a sneeze and said, "Bless you" to the man in front of me. He gave me a dirty look as I began to smell something awful. It wasn't a sneeze. FML
by Anonymous / 07/16/2014 at 10:49pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, while working as a barista, a customer yelled about her muffins and butter not being ready since she only had a "short time to eat". There were 7 tip giving customers ahead of her, but I rushed her order. She gave no tip and stayed for over an hour. FML
by anonymous / 07/16/2014 at 10:46pm / United States (Michigan) / Work
Today, I came home early, only to hear a mad scramble in the living room. I found my now ex-girlfriend and best friend in there, sweaty and in their underwear. The idiot actually had the balls to claim he was teaching her how to do push-ups. FML
by betrayed / 07/16/2014 at 4:09pm / United States (Oregon) / Love
Today, I babysat a 9-year-old kid for the first time. The moment his parents left the house, the little shit looked me dead in the eyes and let me know that if I didn't let him do whatever he wanted, he'd tell his parents that I touched him in his "no-no place". Suddenly I hate kids. FML
by fuck you, kid / 07/16/2014 at 2:56pm / Australia (Queensland) / Kids
by ballbreath / 07/16/2014 at 11:44am / United States (California) / Animals
- Today, I got my first handjob. I also found out today that a girl can pull your skin hard enough to… Today, my grandmother walked in on me watching porn on my computer. She looked at the woman on the… Today, I found out that my gorgeous, smart, perfect new boyfriend has an unusual fetish. It doesn't…