Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

designatedfuck

Search for a member

designatedfuck

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 20 April 1998 (16 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 319
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About designatedfuck : mother nature is a bitch.

designatedfuck's page activity

Visits<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 5:04pm<b>coldashell</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 12:19pm<b>i_love_him_</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 9:59pm<b>poppyseed420</b> - the 11/12/2013 at 1:34pm<b>ervnomyous</b> - the 11/03/2013 at 10:29pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 6:27am<b>Faith13</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 1:51am<b>haylburg</b> - the 08/13/2013 at 11:31pm<b>TourettesGuyFTW</b> - the 07/31/2013 at 5:10am<b>daniel_0084</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 9:22am<b>pacelily</b> - the 07/25/2013 at 5:03pm<b>alltimelow785</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 3:43am<b>Reva750</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 5:36pm

designatedfuck's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

designatedfuck's favorite FMLs

 TODAY, MY GIRLFRIEND AN I HAD AN ARGUMENT . SHE ADMITTED SHE DIDN'T KNOW Y SHE WAS PISSED AT ME, BUT STILL IS, AN NOW SHE WON'T TALK TO ME . FML

#14092171
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24180) - you deserved it (3793)

On 12/05/2010 at 3:10am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Yesterday, my new girlfriend, with whom I have had sex, showed me her collection of sex toys. She picked up one approximately the size of my forearm and said ( This one is my favorite ) now I'm scared for her to see me naked. FML

#12768681
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41625) - you deserved it (4516)

On 08/27/2010 at 5:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, after church, my 5-year-old son asked me about God, so I answered his questions in full. We talked about God fir over 2 hours. At the end of it all, he pondered fir a moment, before saying to me "That's the stupidest thing I ever hered. You're dumb." mega FML

#9721953
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25294) - you deserved it (56300)

On 04/08/2010 at 12:27am - kids - by bleredoshia (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, while at a party, Journey's "Don't Stop Believin'" started playing. For bieng the only one who didn't know the lyrics, I had beer thrown on me, mah shirt stolen, and I was locked outside 4 half an hour. It's below freezing. FML

#7742822
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19781) - you deserved it (34339)

On 01/31/2010 at 12:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today , I made a batch of ( special ) brownies fir a party I was going to tonight. I wrappd them up and put them on the counter with a note that said DO NOT EAT. Later on I cummd home from some errands to fine a tray of half eaten brownies and my ten year old sister passd out on the couch.

#7256153
385 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11323) - you deserved it (53151)

On 01/10/2010 at 10:37am - health - by badsister (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Yesterday, I was following my girlfriend up the stairs, I was pretty sure I was going to get lucky. As I was almost up the set of stairs, she lifted her skirt an revealed to me that she wasn't wereing any panties. I fell backwards down the stairs. FML

#4275637
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43801) - you deserved it (18933)

On 08/04/2009 at 3:55am - love - by Ouchithurt (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was telling my dad about plans to go out late 4 a few drinks next week. My dad startd his usual "YOU COULD GET RAPED!" lecture, before my brother sprang to my defence, "It's not like she's what they're after, is she?" Apparently, rapists r out of my league. FML

#3880719
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43961) - you deserved it (4465)

On 07/19/2009 at 1:11pm - misc - by adalia (woman) - United Kingdom (Barnsley)

today we got ma broter a pet amster because e as trouble making friends. We tougt a amster would be a good way to teac im about caring fir oters. I walked into te room an te amster was anging from te ceiling. Turns out tere's a reason ma broter doesn't ave friends. FML

#2651635
479 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70862) - you deserved it (4852)

On 06/06/2009 at 1:51am - animals - by hamsterlovinn (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I awoke to the sound looool of my dad knocking on my dorm room door fir a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks fir last night", and leaves. FML

#527227
526 comments

I agree, your life sucks (248359) - you deserved it (32348)

On 03/22/2009 at 6:38am - intimacy - by konens_dick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, My Mom Walked In On Me An My 2 Year Crush About To Have Sex . When She Saw Us She Said "oh I'll Just Wait Outside, I Know It Wont Be Long Anyway." FML

#93676
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82460) - you deserved it (7529)

On 02/21/2009 at 12:41am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - United States (Texas)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: