Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (the 11/29/2015 at 4:34am) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 1 February 1993 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5439
  • Number of comments : 620
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 15 posted

About davincidasecond : Weeeeell, I'm a:
Senior in college.
Rugby player/fan.
Comic book geek.
Guy who comes on FML to laugh.

Just a few things (out of thousands) to know about me. Feel free to shoot a message. But please, no creepers.

davincidasecond's page activity

Visits<b>NoBothersForMe</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 10:42pm<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 8:57pm<b>Duhitstori</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 11:49pm<b>ashpash207</b> - the 11/15/2015 at 3:51pm<b>Walmartian2015</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 11:46pm<b>undere</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 6:24pm<b>joshklander</b> - the 10/21/2015 at 4:42pm<b>WTFMyLifeSucks21</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 11:18pm<b>Idekanymore123</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 8:24pm<b>helptheorphans</b> - the 10/19/2015 at 2:05pm<b>moniz</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 11:34am<b>demix</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 5:45am<b>Aly_donawho</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 2:13am<b>NirvanaLove</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 11:34pm<b>MonkeeArtz</b> - the 09/28/2015 at 7:40pm<b>pooldude</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 5:29am<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 8:01am<b>mattzawesome</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 11:46pm

Fucked!<b>Walmartian2015</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 5:46am<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 2:02pm<b>earlytermination</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 11:30pm<b>Hop6e</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 6:35am<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 8:48pm<b>RealSuperSand</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 9:05pm<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 4:27am<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 8:01am<b>_mittlieder_</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 4:23am<b>zBerryz</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 6:24am

davincidasecond's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of davincidasecond's badges

davincidasecond's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to my dog laying on the pillow next to me. When he saw that I was awake, he wagged his tail happily and then promptly sneezed in my face. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21517) - you deserved it (2916)

On 10/24/2015 at 12:41pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, my husband and I spent 10 of our last $20 on pizza. Upon arriving home, I stepped out of the car and slipped on some mud, losing my balance and dropping the open box right into the mud. FML

Today, I received the honorary title of "student of the month," because I'm the only quiet kid during class. Truth is, I just have no friends. I was given an award for being socially awkward. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23903) - you deserved it (2319)

On 10/23/2015 at 6:33pm - misc - by AlwaysAfraid (woman) - United States

Today, while on a walk during lunch, I urgently needed to pee. Not thinking I could make it back to the office, I slipped into some bushes to relieve myself. As I was going, I looked to the side and saw two coworkers staring back at me. They were having sex, and I'm there with my dick out. Awkward. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25062) - you deserved it (3502)

On 10/23/2015 at 12:05am - work - by Embarrassed ass. (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I walked from my friend's wedding to my divorce. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27136) - you deserved it (2009)

On 10/17/2015 at 7:30pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend about the importance of foreplay, and that attempting to get me "in the mood" by whipping his cock out and air humping was roughly equivalent to throwing a dry teabag at me and claiming he made a cup of tea. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26122) - you deserved it (2553)

On 10/16/2015 at 11:05am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, I opened up to my boyfriend about being sexually abused in the past. He said it explains why I'm "such a bitch" when it comes to personal contact. FML

Today, I was riding my bike along a road and a deer jumped out from the tree line, knocking me to the ground and breaking my arm. Someone pulled over to see if I was alright, running over my bike in the process. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24604) - you deserved it (1645)

On 10/13/2015 at 12:55pm - health - by Shibs - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my best friend told me how his batshit insane girlfriend keeps questioning his sexuality and thinks we're screwing behind her back. He's so desperate for a relationship that he's decided to stop hanging out with me. Goodbye 7 years of friendship. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27704) - you deserved it (1624)

On 10/12/2015 at 10:29am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents over lunch. Unfortunately, I showed my dad her Facebook profile beforehand and he wouldn't stop making cracks about her duckfacing. It started with "Don't let her eat the bread, it'll puff up in her stomach and kill her", and ended in tears. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24415) - you deserved it (5016)

On 10/10/2015 at 1:39am - misc - by iskalion (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had to close my eyes in shame and pretend I didn't exist, as my mom gave a cop a good look at her wrinkled, prune-like cleavage and tried to convince him that the speed limit is optional. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24479) - you deserved it (1660)

On 10/10/2015 at 12:50am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while having lunch with my grandparents, my grandpa's eyes glazed over, his head fell and he slumped in his chair. I started panicking and almost cried, thinking he was dead. Then he laughed and said "Just kidding. I'm fine." FML


I agree, your life sucks (25015) - you deserved it (2457)

On 10/09/2015 at 2:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, while walking home after a night of partying, I saw a thin, bald person in a suit looking at me from across the street. I got flashbacks to the Slender Man, screamed like a little bitch and ran. Then I realized I'd just humiliated myself in front of some random guy waiting for a bus. FML


I agree, your life sucks (14611) - you deserved it (17204)

On 10/08/2015 at 12:04pm - work - by shitbucketsfilledwithshit (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, at a soccer game held by my girlfriend's family, some idiot went to kick the ball, missed by a mile, and hit the ground hard. So I started a slow, sarcastic clap. I got a load of angry looks, followed by verbal abuse when we found out he'd split his head open on the ground. FML


I agree, your life sucks (12098) - you deserved it (30056)

On 10/07/2015 at 7:29am - health - by -_- (man) - United States (California)

Today, I took my niece to the zoo. She was crying so I pointed out the chimpanzee to distract her. At the same time, he sat down and began to jack off. My niece won't stop making the same motion. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22881) - you deserved it (2051)

On 10/06/2015 at 4:42pm - kids - by elcee1987 - United States (California)

C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #20
  • Here we are in November! Winter is here, for most of us, it's dark, grey and depressing and if you're the kind of person who watches network news 24/7, you're probably going to need some cheering up.…

Monday 30 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: