About datgamerchick : Jess. I'm 19, and I like funny things. Good grammar is sexy.
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datgamerchick's favorite FMLs
Today, I was browsing the web when I checked the search history. Turns out my son has been searching for "nude grills" and "hot grills." Not only is my 12-year-old son attempting to find porn on the internet, he also can't spell. FML
by Nickname / 07/27/2011 at 10:02pm / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy
Today, while working at Subway, a man ordered a sub with avocado. When I told him it was no longer available, he screamed, spit in my face and ran out, pushing over an innocent bystander in the process. FML
by sandwichmaker / 07/16/2011 at 10:46pm / United States (Illinois) / Work
by katie / 05/25/2011 at 4:23am / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/12/2011 at 10:20pm / Animals
by allgrowedup / 02/11/2011 at 10:10pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/13/2010 at 8:43am / United Kingdom (London) / Work
Today, I was spooning with my wife when I said, "It's cold tonight." Previously when I used that line, my wife would respond by saying, "I know how to warm you up" and we would make love. Tonight, she said "I know how to warm you up" and farted on me. FML
by cold-n-stinky / 01/12/2010 at 1:30am / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
Today, I was at the cinema. There was a really tall woman in front of me and whenever I leaned to the right or left she would lean to the same side I do. Later, she started laughing. They guy next to her was telling her where I moved. FML
by Mogg / 12/18/2009 at 3:42am / Australia (South Australia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I texted a somewhat overweight girl I wanted to hook up with and asked her "Have you been dating anyone lately?" Unfortunately with predictive text, "dating" came out as "eating". I didn't realize it till after it sent. FML
by Proof-Reader / 12/15/2009 at 3:32am / United States (California) / Love
by nosrepamai82 / 07/26/2009 at 12:28am / United States (Florida) / Love
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML
by I_Am_The_Edge / 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was walking when a man pointed a camera at me. I got bitchy about it, and said "Did I say you could take a picture?" He replied with, "No, but can you get the fuck out of the way so I can take one of my wife and kids?" I turned around, and they were right behind me. FML
by PicturePerfect / 03/02/2009 at 4:33pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by peacock_mina19 / 02/10/2009 at 7:08pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
by poisonhand / 01/14/2009 at 10:32am / United States (Michigan) / Love
- Today, I was sexting my boss. I realised that I wasn't texting my boyfriend after I'd sent 2 nudes,… Today, my boyfriend and I ordered sex toys online and had them delivered to my dorm room. I put my… Today, my girlfriend and I were getting heated. I kissed her on the neck, chest, stomach, and threw…